Re: thanks for checking on me

[Guest guest]

,

I feel so horrible for having written and then I didn't read my

email. Some days I can read and post and other days it is so

difficult to read about pain and suffering.

Of course, I am glad to see you did write me back. I am saddened to

know that you are still not feeling much better. And girlfriend, we

all have had those moments when all you can do is clutch the heating

pad and sob. I just pray that you are feeling a little less

stressed with being so upset about everything. I hope the crying is

helping release a little anxiety.

I have been on Marinol for about a week. I have found that I need a

pill in the middle of the day. I am currently taking 2.5 mg/3 times

a day. In the middle of the week, I felt the effects of the apetite

stimulant...I am taking an interest in food and I am even craving

some different foods, like pancakes. I am going to try one later

this weekend. Eating new food is still a pretty big deal, as I got

very sick last weekend from eating something my body just wasn't

having. That was the first time I had actually vomited in weeks and

it wasn't pretty, but sometimes it is better out than in. Sorry if

that was too much info. The pain has become a little more

prominent, but have already decreased the amount of Roxicet I am

taking and continue to decrease the amt. each week. I am kicking a--

with not getting into trouble with the pain meds. Besides the

meth. incident I've been very lucky to have been on a LOT of pain

meds and not had issue with getting off of them.

I am still longing to work out. If I continue to do this well,

maybe I'll be able to start doing some activity by mid-Dec??? We'll

see how motivated I am, because I am damn good at being a lazy,

couch potato.

I am most touched and very happy to hear that you still have close,

girlfriends. I've talked a lot (this past year) about how letdown

and hurt I've been by people who I considered to be very close

friends. I am trying to see this in a different light, but I still

regress from time to time. It is important to have those moments to

be mindful and let go. I am sorry to hear about your weekend trip

cancelation. My mom is trying to talk me out of going to

Thanksgiving, which I am very upset about. I haven't done anything

for the last year and if I am well, there is nothing more than me

wanting to be with my family. Granted, there are going to be 30

different people with germs and I am praying that I don't get the

flu, but I really want to go. Hope I don't live to regret that

choice.

Anyways, maybe now isn't the best time to be away from home. When I

don't feel well it is nice to be in my own surroundings. Enjoy Sat.

with the kids and oysters. It sounds like fun. I am going to

attempt the grocery store today and the movies on Sunday.

Well, I am very glad to hear that the doc isn't going to scope ya.

What made him change his mind?

You have helped me tremendously since I've joined. You are so

sweet, caring, always have great advice, and you just listen when I

need to vent. Thanks for being a great friend!

Love,