Re: weight gain causing EXTREME sadness--long - trisha (collen)

[Guest guest]

I understand what you are saying because i went through the same

thing when i was pregnant but my gosh 2 pnds i would have jumped for

joy lol i gained a wopping 33 pnds i was all baby and i ate 24/7 too

and junk food i am 6 months post partum now and need to lose about

10/15 pnds i was 133/135 and now 143/147 fluctuating..its mainly my

butt and hips my baby weighed 5 pnds 13 oz and now he is 6 months

old weighing 16 pnds 12 oz hehe healthy as can be too...i so

understand the fear of gaining but had i not gained with him i think

he would have been smaller i dont know..?

> >

> > you only gained 2 pnds??? and your 32 weeks???

>

> Still, I KNOW exactly what Trisha is saying!!! I am 30 weeks, and

at

> my last appt I had gained 6 lbs in 4 weeks (I think 3lbs was water

> weight as the day before I was 3 lbs less and chugged h2O for the

> bloodwork). ugh!!!! I was 12 months post-op when I started

pregnancy

> at 237 lbs. I fell back into ketosis and dropped to 219 around week

> 18 I think and then gained it back kicking and screaming (and

enforced

> carb-loading on my nutritionists orders) and made it back to 227/229

> for most of my pregnancy. went from 229 at week 24 to 235 at week

28.

> Doc has said from week 18 on she wanted me to gain a lb a week but

I

> sure HATE that concept. I was trying anyway and eat constantly, I

> mean from the time I wake up to middle of the night snacks when I

get

> up to tinkle.

>

> The baby has measured on target each time (not the high side of

> average, more like the lower end of expected size, but still) Each

> bite in my mouth is forced because I know the baby needs it. That

> fear tho that I will wake up and be 360 again, it gives me

> nightmares. I will be no use to my son if I cannot get to goal and

> stay healthy, or if I gain too much. My family is supportive but

they

> don't understand how I can be upset about the weight gain. only 1

lb

> net gain at 30 weeks sounds fabulous to them, but to many of us,

every

> lb higher is 1 lb closer to the nightmare of health and emotional

> issues we thought we'd left behind us.

>

> If the scale goes higher, we are happy for our growing child, but

sad

> for our own bodies... if the scale goes lower or stays the same we

are

> happy for our healthy future but worried we are hurting our baby by

> not eating enough. there is no happy joy joy feeling for any of the

> weight changes. nothing but mixed emotions and fear for me. I am

> trying so hard to stay calm and just focus on my wonderful growing

son

> and that is what makes me eat on schedule and get in all the

calories

> I can. If I am really struggling I take out a baby outfit or toy

and

> set it on the table in front of me to remind me why I have to stuff

my

> face

>

> I am praying I do NOT gain another 12 lbs in the 10 weeks I have

left

> but my doc sure would be happier if I did. All I can do is eat on

> time, eat the measured amounts and love on my big swollen tummy and

> hope my baby is going to be just fine. My hubby hugs me and tells me

> there will be plenty of time to torture myself about my weight after

> is born and he has SWORN to exercise with me to make sure I

get

> back into shape and then some. He knows I still need to lose 50-70

> more lbs after the baby is born and we also want to try again for

> another baby 6 months after is born. he thinks we can make

it

> happen and I have to have that hope in my mind, but that evil evil

> scale sure can torture us in the meantime!

>

> hugs!!!!!

> Colleen

> Open RNY 5-9-03

> 361/236/160 (after delivery)

> due 1-23-05