RE: a stranger to me

[Guest guest]

I am so sorry you are having these problems. I know this must be

breaking your heart.

Sounds like your husband is having a very-very diffficult time

living with the scares cancer puts into you. He feels like his world

is ending. Everypne handles their cancer differently. I feel that

your husband is suffering from severe depression. He needs to get

some counceling to get some help with dealing with his emotions.

Is there anyway you can talk to his doctor and explain what is

going on? Perhaps the doctor can talk to him and get him to take some

anti-depressents.

You have not been able to reach him. The only thing you can do is

let him know you are and will be there for him. Let him know when you

can how much you love him and want to be there for him.

Until he can come to grips with his feelings there is not much you

can do. I am so very sorry you are hurting so much.

Please come here and post and talk about your feelings. That is

what this board is for.

I am hoping there are others here that will anwser you and give you

some better ideas on how to handle this.

Please know I am adding you into my Prayers. Ingrid

>

> Hello,

> My husband was diagnosed w/ colon cancer this summer. He also has

> ulcerative colitus which makes him very sick. He has not been

himself

> for a very long time. We got into an argument a month ago and he

> left. When i would talk to him he would say he was drinking alot

of

> alcohol. He said it was the only thing that would help his stomach

> pains. So I found him & talked to him told him we could get him

> help. So i left for a few hours & when I returned home he was gone-

> no note, no messages. Well, I checked & he is still making his dr

> appointments but he has not got in contact with me for about a

week.

> This is very hard for me because he was my best friend & we have

> always gotten along so well with each other. We didnt get into a

> fight & I gave him a big hug & kiss before I left-- Some people say

> that when someone gets cancer they push thier loved ones away--

Have

> any of you ever experieced this? Maybe I just cant put myself in

his

> place, but I think that if I was told I had cancer I would want to

> spend alot of time with my spouse- I'm heart broken & dont know

what

> to do. He has just abandoned me & all I want is to be there for him

> sorry to ramble- just needed to write

>

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 12/9/2005 8:40:14 AM Eastern Standard Time,

myfaith05@... writes:

Everyone, thank you for your replies & for adding us to your prayers.

I hope you dont mind, but i think I will continue to post here. I didnt

realize that I would need support also. This has been very hard for me & I

know

my husband is having such a difficult time, I just pray he allows me back

into his life.

We are all praying for you and hubby...that his heart will soften and he'll

realize that he needs you as much as you need to be there for him. Please

stay and hopefully we can give you the support you need to get through

this...CANCER stinks...and just doesn't care what " it " does to families!!!

I must have missed your name...sorry!! But welcome, nevertheless...

Lots of hugs and prayers, Donelle

Caregiver to Glenn