RE: What is your empathy quotient?

[Guest guest]

> TWELVE.

>

> OMG. I must be a horrible person to be around -- how is it I have friends

> at all???

Well, Jacquie, I actually like people for reasons other than how much I can

whine to them and get their sympathy. If you are an interesting person,

then that is often enough for me. I like different people. Of course, I

married Lou, thinking he was interesting so perhaps I should not judge.

You know, some people give you empathy and that is nice. And some people

give you other things: good conversations, unusual viewpoints, wit, and a

very nice online list like PA!

Salli

[Guest guest]

> My SQ was 17, thick as pig shit springs to mind *smirk*

>

Oh, what is the SQ and WHERE can it be found?

Salli

[Guest guest]

I got a 56.

Does that make me whimpy

[Guest guest]

Mine isn't much better IMO....34

Still below average.

I suck ;0)

Georga

What is your empathy quotient?

> http://www.guardian.co.uk/life/flash/page/0,13249,937836,00.html

>

> I scored a 20. Hmmm.

>

> Tuna

>

> =====

> mom to:

> , 8, ASD

> , 4, NT

>

> Normal is just a setting on the washing machine.

> - Whoopi Goldberg

>

> ______________________________________________________________________

> Post your free ad now! http://personals.yahoo.ca

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

36 here, sigh, I bite too, hehe

Missy

What is your empathy quotient?

> http://www.guardian.co.uk/life/flash/page/0,13249,937836,00.html

>

> I scored a 20. Hmmm.

>

> Tuna

>

> =====

> mom to:

> , 8, ASD

> , 4, NT

>

> Normal is just a setting on the washing machine.

> - Whoopi Goldberg

>

> ______________________________________________________________________

> Post your free ad now! http://personals.yahoo.ca

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Sheesh, no wonder I'm an emotional basketcase! I scored a 58!!!!!

ellen

What is your empathy quotient?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/life/flash/page/0,13249,937836,00.html

I scored a 20. Hmmm.

Tuna

=====

mom to:

, 8, ASD

, 4, NT

Normal is just a setting on the washing machine.

- Whoopi Goldberg

______________________________________________________________________

Post your free ad now! http://personals.yahoo.ca

[Guest guest]

47 here, just your average woman. Leggs

[Guest guest]

I scored a 67. Ruh Roh.

Maggie

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[Guest guest]

Maggie,

HOLY COW!!!!!! Do people walk all over you too?!?

ellen

Re: What is your empathy quotient?

I scored a 67. Ruh Roh.

Maggie

________________________________________________________________

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[Guest guest]

LOL!

My problem is it depends on the day how assertive I am. Some days, for

whatever reason I put up with more shit and take more shit than any person

should be allowed to by law.

Georga

Re: What is your empathy quotient?

> >

> >

> > Well, sometimes. Last year, my new year's resolution was to become

> more

> > assertive. After people stopped being flabbergasted, it was easier.

> > Being empathetic doesn't have to mean being a doormat, yes?

> >

> > Maggie

> >

> > ________________________________________________________________

> > The best thing to hit the internet in years - Juno SpeedBand!

> > Surf the web up to FIVE TIMES FASTER!

> > Only $14.95/ month - visit www.juno.com to sign up today!

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

I also scored 20. It honestly doesn't surprise me. My mother did a

real good job knocking the empathy out of me. Never mind the fact

that I've always had issues. Half the time I'm as cold as ice. It

doesn't mean I don't care because I do, I have a crappy way of

showing it and expressing it.

No Questions at to why.

[Guest guest]

I scored 12.

TWELVE.

OMG. I must be a horrible person to be around -- how is it I have friends

at all???

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

Mine was 56.

Sue

[Guest guest]

Nope, it makes you just like me and ellen!

Sue

[Guest guest]

Wow Maggie! You must be the one that EVERYONE comes to with their problems!

Sue, who is caretaker to several friends and family members here :-)

[Guest guest]

> Being empathetic doesn't have to mean being a doormat, yes?

Not in the least! I don't think I let people walk on me, but I do tend to

get involved and try to make things better for those who need it.

Sue

[Guest guest]

> My score was a 72

>

> Debbie E

Zoikies!! If I'm ever having a horrible time, I now know who to go to!!

Sue

[Guest guest]

> OMG. I must be a horrible person to be around -- how is it I have

friends

> at all???

Because you are not a horrible person at all. You are just not as

empathic, or able to 'read' people as well as others, but it does not

mean that you are not kind or thoughtful, for we know that you are.

Everyone had different talents and abilities. You have many others

which lead to the formation of this list and the hope and support you

have extended to many through this list. So be NICE to yourself! ;-)

[Guest guest]

> Everyone had different talents and abilities. You have many others

> which lead to the formation of this list and the hope and support you

> have extended to many through this list. So be NICE to yourself! ;-)

Well, thanks.

You know, I've been thinking since that test: how could someone with zero

empathy create a list like this, where it abounds? Then I realized: I'm

the only one who COULD do it!

When it comes to enforcing the basic tenets of the list like not

criticizing, not sniping, not judging, not forcing your opinions on someone

else, I am totally capable of doing that because I truly don't CARE about

anyone's reasons for doing negative and hurtful things. It's just not

acceptable. There's a good and moral way of treating other people, and on

THIS list, you WILL treat other people morally and respectfully or you're

gone. Period. Your motives are your own business, and if they interfere

with the peace of the on-list collective, then that's your problem.

I don't think I could do that if I were more empathetic; I think a more

empathetic person might get caught up in reasons and motives and

behind-the-scenes problems and feelings that one person might be more right

or justified than another. Or feel that everyone has a right to express

every opinion, even if it's hurtful to someone else. Or who knows what. I

know that more empathy leads to more shades of gray - but for me, everything

is black and white. There's a right and wrong to treat people. Period.

This doesn't always make me the easiest list owner to deal with, as some

people could testify, but every time I log on to this list and see everyone

'palying by the rules' and the supportive and loving environment doing so

has created, I KNOW that I've been doing the right thing. I may not be the

most empathetic or sympathetic person out there, but my way has seemed to

make 300 people happy, so I have a lot of pride and a lot of contentment.

And I KNOW that in this case, a lack of empathy has actually made it all

happen.

:-)

Jacquie

PS - my right and wrong viewpoint does not extend to behind the scenes of

the list. If two members have personal problems that do not encroach on

list space, I don't get involved. That's a personal policy. I refuse to

judge who's right or wrong off list.

[Guest guest]

Thanks, Sue. The presentation in front of 40 people was very difficult

for me, but I just thought about the children who are served by the FRC.

I've repressed all memory of it, however.

Maggie

________________________________________________________________

The best thing to hit the internet in years - Juno SpeedBand!

Surf the web up to FIVE TIMES FASTER!

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[Guest guest]

> I got a 56.

>

> Does that make me whimpy

Only if my 57 makes me whimpy.

I don't think I am. I've been accused of being bitchy more often than

considerate.

Tina

[Guest guest]

> Being empathetic doesn't have to mean being a doormat, yes?

>

Absolutely not.

But I think it's the reason I'm accused of being bitchy at times. I

understand where people are coming from and why they feel the way

they do but I don't always 'act' sympathetic if I feel I need to

behave in another manner to protect my kids or myself.

I used to be a doormat. I used to be a victim. Not anymore. Just

because I'm very empathetic and I want everyone around me to be happy

doesn't mean that I should sacrifice my own well-being for theirs.

*wiping brow* but dang it's hard sticking to my principles some days!

Tina

[Guest guest]

and my SQ is 13 :-|

~~~ Imagine all the people, living life in peace - Lennon ~~~

-------------------------

gina, 31, ny

single mom to -

kailey, 8, autism, hyperlexia, depression, anxiety, OCD, DSI

trevor, 3, multiple developmental delays, no " official " dx yet

parker jade, due 7-25-03 :-D

[Guest guest]

> http://www.guardian.co.uk/life/flash/page/0,13249,937836,00.html

>

> I scored a 20. Hmmm.

>

> Tuna

>

> =====

> mom to:

I got a 45.. I thought I'd be lower, as I get older, I seem to get

more blunt and cynical.

Kerri

[Guest guest]

I scored a 68.

Jacquie H

What is your empathy quotient?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/life/flash/page/0,13249,937836,00.html

I scored a 20. Hmmm.

Tuna

=====

mom to:

, 8, ASD

, 4, NT

Normal is just a setting on the washing machine.

- Whoopi Goldberg

______________________________________________________________________

Post your free ad now! http://personals.yahoo.ca