Guest guest Posted September 3, 2001 Report Share Posted September 3, 2001 > sorry went on a rant here really did I not?? I guess it is a bit of a raw > spot for me.. > > Lonnie Phoebe & Eloisa's mama > & expecting a Christmas delivery... Raw spot for me too Lonnie - though much better now we've moved away. Put briefly my younger sister basically rejected her son when he was born (they're okay now) and my Mum bonded with him instead! She thinks the sun shines out of his ar** and he can do no wrong - and it's very hurtful when my kids don't get the same deal. It used to wind me up something chronic, as we all used to visit together on a Sunday - anything he wanted, any toy he desired etc etc had to be handed over from my children because 'he doesn't understand' 'just let him have a little turn' etc etc or he'd have a temper tantrum - and this went on even with Verity who was younger than him! Since we've moved it's much better because M+D will come and visit us on their own for the weekend, and my kids get to have their unrivalled attention, without having to compete with No1 child. Although my Mum will still do the comparing thing on the phone and I know she talks about how badly behaved etc my kids are behind my back to my sisters (they're not btw!) . It really doesn't get to me anymore - he will always be special to her - and you can't help who you fall in love with can you? Hannah, 27 (who's had sisters and kids to stay for a long weekend and hasn't been able to post) Mum to Bethany 7, Lawrence 5 1/2, Verity 3, Alfie 6 months Visit me on the web at :- http://hannahshome.20m.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 3, 2001 Report Share Posted September 3, 2001 Lonnie I can relate to this but from the reverse. My DB lives in Trondheim with his gf and dd3, his dd2 lives in Bergen with her mum and DD1 in UK with her mum ( Still with me!). I live 15mins away from M & D so obviously they see my 2 far more often and I also go every friday without dks to do some work for dad and to give mum some respite from caring for him. Anyway two years ago DB had a blazing row with M & D about the amount of time we spend with them in relation to the amount of time they do - this was because at 6pm DB had announced that he and gf were going out leaving his dd2 (aged 11) to babysit the little one. Mum hit the roof saying that they were being unfair on both children and her as she had just started cooking them a large family meal etc and had dad to care for. DB whinged that they sat for us far more often etc till dad thoroughly p***d off by him behaving like a 16yo explained that they sat for us about 3 time a year - that I gave advanced warning about 3 months before, in writing that we cooked the girls dinner there, bathed them ,read their bed time story and put them to bed and then came back to sleep the night. so that all m & d do is just listen out to make sure dd2 hasn't fallen out of bed ( All true its like a military maneuver). We do the same at Christmas - decamp down to them lock stock & barrel and last year I did the whole lot myself - mum was 'allowed ' to advise from a chair in the kitchen with a wine in one hand and time table in the other lol and a good job I did too. DB has since realized that it is not favoritism but I am here and therefore shoulder the burden of caring for elderly parents and although he cannot help me I do keep him upto date as far as I can - its not always easy as he is not too well at the moment and his gf is being treated for chronic depression. Caroline Jersey > My mother is one for favouritism.. she would never see it that way and I am > certain thinks she is very fair and non judgemental over all her family.. ... Thing is however, that because it > is not enjoyable to tell her about what my daughters do I don't really offer > much information anymore.. Where as when I speak to my father (my parents > divorced when I was 5) he is interested and asks questions and have never > ONCE compared his granddaughters.. so it is far more pleasurable to tell my > father about this sort of thing than it is my mother. So in doing this she > actually looses out.. > > sorry went on a rant here really did I not?? I guess it is a bit of a raw > spot for me.. > > Lonnie Phoebe & Eloisa's mama > & expecting a Christmas delivery... > My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what > you start. > So far today, I have finished 2 bags of chips and a Chocolate cake. > > I feel better already. Germain Jersey British Channel Islands Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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