Glenn update...11/20/05

[Guest guest]

Good morning to all our friends and family...

First of all, thank you to all who have called, visited, brought food, sent

cards, emails, positive thoughts and prayers....one of those prayers has been

answered. And, I'm feeling so grateful today. Glenn has been agonizing

silently, deep within, (my opinion) for quite a while, but more so the last

week, about the situation with his Mom and brother (ILL) and sister (TX). Out

of the blue, he quietly said, " I think I should call Dennis and let them come "

and I quietly said, " I think you should and hopefully, unburden your heart " .

He immediately called his brother last night and told him to come and bring

his Mom...didn't call his Mom....told Dennis to do it for him. But, would

not agree for to come... I hope she comes anyway. With Glenn, there is no

" gray " , it's either " black " or " white " ...right or wrong. He doesn't agree

with 's life-style, simply put. But I'm still working slowly on him about

this...he really has no right to judge and she is his sister. His Mom had

sent me a check, unbeknownst to Glenn, to help out with expenses... I'm so glad

I didn't tell him about it BEFORE he made this decision. At least I know

the decision came from his heart and not out of a feeling of obligation. I'm

very relieved about this...and just pray he doesn't change his mind again. I

had asked her to make copies of any childhood photos she or Dennis have or

scan them and email them to me...I wanted to try that tactic, thinking

childhood memories would jog his heart. I still want the photos, as I'm

attempting

to gather things for a scrapbook for his son and daughter.

Health-wise...what health?? LOL I've lost almost 30 lbs., which won't hurt

me a bit, btw...in the last couple months. First of all, Glenn is not

cooking and 2nd, I'm having some tummy problems, which I'm sure are

stress-related

and just plain being heart-broken and sad. Glenn is just plain tired and

so very weak, sleeping a lot, which will just increase as time goes on. Some

times, his voice is but a whisper...or nothing comes out at all. But, thank

God, he's not suffering daily with any pain...the pain patch is working

marvelously. And whenever there is break-through pain of any kind, I give him

an

oxycodone. His color is, as Narice calls it, a golden glow. He has days

where he's very lightheaded all day long. Yesterday was one, again. I

checked

his b/p (82/54...low but has been running low for a while), blood sugar

(116...never ever that low before) and temp. All were fine, so just started

forcing salt, water and gatorade, b/c of the diarrhea. His appetite is great,

he

eats anything he wants, even knowing there might be diarrhea repercussions,

which he has anyway. The " bruising " marks we talked about before caused by

the liver not functioning properly are now all over both arms, shoulders and

back with some on his knees and upper thigh. He itches all the time (part of

the progression) and when he scratches, the " bruising " bleeds, even if he

just uses his fingertips and not nails. Dr. prescribed a Sarna Lotion, which

Hospice brought last week and Benadryl for the itching...the lotion helps, but

he had an adverse reaction to the Benadryl of stomach irritation, so we

stopped that and the pain is gone.

For those that asked, we prepared a Will, DNR, Medical Directives and all

that stuff 2 yrs. ago...so that's all taken care of. I've verified with

Arlington that he is eligible, just for his knowledge and comfort.

Hospice is great so far...comfort, physically, emotionally and mentally, is

the name of the game. Nurse comes on Mondays to check vitals, fix a light

lunch for him, etc. and Social Worker is coming one day a week to help Glenn

get some memories recorded on tape, so I don't have to write it all down... he

may be more open with her than me, too, about some things. Bath Aide is

coming one day a week, fix a light lunch and just to be here while he showers,

if he wants to that day, but mostly just to get to know her, so he's

comfortable with her when the time comes she is needed. She will also change

the

sheets, if need be. A volunteer will come one day, fix a light lunch for him

and just sit and talk with him or watch TV or just " be " with him for a couple

hrs (on a day I'm working). I'm working from home on Tues. now and off Fri.

Sat. and Sun. So, at least for now, he'll be given lunch and fluids at least

once a day, while I'm gone to work, on those days that he's in bed all day

long...

It is definitely the proverbial " roller coaster " ride these days...running

the gambit on emotions. All I can do for him is try to make him comfortable

and let him know I love him and God loves him. Anything more than that

becomes too emotional for me to handle without tears...and there are things I

want

to say and things I want him to say...but most have all been said somewhere

along the way in the last 6 yrs.

Hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving...My sister is bringing us dinner

and I'll cook a turkey, so we have the smell of Thanksgiving going on...and

lots of turkey sandwiches to enjoy..yummy!! Guess I'll have to make a

pumpkin pie, too!! Can't have thanksgiving without pumpkin pie!!! Enjoy and

give

thanks for each day we've been given and we will, too!!!

Lots of hugs and prayers, Donelle

Caregiver to Glenn