Re: Ordering from Amazon USA

[Guest guest]

Is anyone on the list in or going to America shortly? (?

Ruthie?) If so, perhaps it could be delivered to their hotel for them

to bring back for you? Postage within USA is far far cheaper

especailly if under 1kg than if sending abroad, even allowing postage

within the UK. Or if not in a hurry, can Amazon send by surface mail

(about 4 weeks delivery I think) which should be cheaper.

>

> Miranda

> www.twinkleontheweb.co.uk

I hope to go *sometime* this autumn but as yet I have no idea when.

I'll keep you posted.

Ruthie ( In Jerusalem atm!)

[Guest guest]

I'm happy for stuff to be sent to my house, and then to send it on to the

UK. Not sure if the double shipping charges would make it worthwhile or

not. You can check out the price of US to UK postage at

http://www.usps.com

Stuff I've sent recently has taken around 5 days to arrive in UK. I've

always just told the recipients to reimburse my postage costs by making a

donation to NCT, but that's always been in the range of a couple of

dollars.

Joyce

[Guest guest]

I have just got back from California. I'm definitely off to Boston on 4th

November, and possible to New York before that - so let me know.

> Is anyone on the list in or going to America shortly? (?

> Ruthie?) If so, perhaps it could be delivered to their hotel for them

> to bring back for you? Postage within USA is far far cheaper

> especailly if under 1kg than if sending abroad, even allowing postage

> within the UK. Or if not in a hurry, can Amazon send by surface mail

> (about 4 weeks delivery I think) which should be cheaper.

> >

[Guest guest]

> I have just got back from California. I'm definitely off to Boston

on 4th

> November, and possible to New York before that - so let me know.

>

>

>

seems a better transatlantic bet than me; my plans are all

in the air at the moment, a sort of vague " I *want* to go

sometime... "

Right now I'm a bit shell shocked cos Tavya Dov and Rafi have just

announced they are coming back to the UK with us for a few days. I

knew Dov was coming for a wedding, but Tavya and the baby were going

to stay here. After some discussions at lunch yesterday Tavya

decided what the heck, she had the time, and so long as her Daddy

would pay the airfare... (hmm!)

Of course I am delighted to have them always, I guess I just have to

get my head around having a family in the London house when I come

back from this extremely family-concentrated trip to Israel. I knew

Zehava would be with me for a week before she went back to " sem " but

I had imagined otherwise the house would be quiet. Can anyone out

there understand my very slight mixed feelings? Or am I being

extremely selfish?

In truth it will be useful having Tavya there. Zehava is going to

meet her very first young man by introduction the day after we get

back... (sort of matchmaker, matchmaker thing, that's the way things

are done with us; all background investigations are done by both

families, it's up to the young couple to see if they find each other

compatible) and she'll appreciate her big sister's support. I'm not

sure this one will be " the one " ...well one is never sure, but I don't

have that *feeling* about it. I could be wrong. But either way

she'll get good experience and have a better idea about what she

*does* want, next time she is introduced to someone. It's not

arranged marriage, as she has complete freedom to accept or reject

the young man, it's just a more researched way of getting to meet

someone she might otherwise never meet; in this case the young man

is driving down from the North East to meet her. Dov, *and* Avigayil

and Doniel have met him, and whereas they aren't wildly " YES YES he

is perfect for you Zehava!! " they all think he is worth while

meeting.

So we will see.

So you see why I am ambivalent about going to the USA. I don't know

*what* the next few weeks/months will bring.

Ruthie

[Guest guest]

I will let you know , but they would be rather heavy (although

fascinating, especially the costume one!!) - will try through Amazon

UK first...thanks very much to you and Joyce for your offers!

love

Caro

[Guest guest]

Hypothetically if this young man were suitable, how fast might

things

> move? Would we be talking months or over a year? Or perhaps

that's

> just up to them..

>

> Caro

You are going to be very shocked at my answer, and I feel I have to

defend it before I say it. Because all the investigations into

suitability have been done *before* the couple meet, and all they

have to sort out is if they like each other, are compatible, are

sexually attracted etc, the procedure can move pretty fast. It is

not unusual for a couple to get engaged within a couple of weeks. I

got engaged to DH three months after first meeting him, but that was

because he was in Cambridge and we didn't see each other very often.

By today's standards that would be considered a long time!

Engagements are short. Average 3-6 months, as no phyiscal contact at

all is allowed before marriage, so it really isn't fair to drag it

out. The couple spend the engagement in a more relaxed " getting to

know each other " mode, and a very small percentage break off during

this period. I would say no more than 10%.

I know this method must sound very alien to you, but it seems to work

for us. Marriages are, on the whole, happy and our divorce

statistics lower than the national average. There is no social

coercion to stay in an unhappy marriage, and divorce is not made

difficult, so the matchmaking method, known as a " shidduch " , must

have *something* going for it!

Ruthie

[Guest guest]

<grin> Ruthie - not having changed the title looks as if you might be

matchmaking with raw material from Amazon!! (I should have changed

it!)

> Engagements are short. Average 3-6 months

Doesn't surprise me greatly, the short engagement for reasons stated

is obviously a good idea; I knew a Seikh girl for whom things moved

fairly fast - she had only seen the boy twice and unfortunately her

family hadn't done enough research :-( but she's still with him, and I

think divorce is a very shocking thing in that community (the words

betrayal of my family I think I've heard on her lips)

Errrum, all this means, Ruthie, perhaps a big social event to arrange

at fairly short notice, though again you are used to it all!!

Caro

Happy waving of foliage etc!!

[Guest guest]

> <grin> Ruthie - not having changed the title looks as if you might

be

> matchmaking with raw material from Amazon!! (I should have changed

> it!)

>

> > Engagements are short. Average 3-6 months

>

>

> Doesn't surprise me greatly, the short engagement for reasons

stated

> is obviously a good idea; I knew a Seikh girl for whom things

moved

> fairly fast - she had only seen the boy twice <snip>

Well...I didn't want to shock you TOO much, but in fact the " few

weeks " was erring on the large side:-) My girls met their intendeds

on average 6 times before getting engaged. Tavya and Dov got engaged

on the 5th meeting, so did Avigayil and Doniel, Sara and Benzy

" dragged it out " to 8 times <grin> Tammy and Allan also 8 times I

think. Uri and Leora got engaged pretty fast too, 3 or 4 meetings.

So yes I could be making a winter wedding if this one works...

If it doesn't...there *is* another boy we are interesting in her

meeting, but his parents think he's too young to begin shidduchs yet,

and have agreed to reconsider his readiness *after* Sukkot, so...

(personally even though I haven't met either boy the second one

sounds more her type, but one never knows!)

Anyway, Zehava fancies shopping for her trousseau in NY so either way

I hopefully will get a trip there :-))

Ruthie