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Re: Tortured

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> But they had been at his place for over an hour, Sophie later

> confirmed. He did it to torture me. That is the only explanation.

Why does this continue to amaze me? Isn't there anything you can do

legally...on the grounds of emotional abuse? Violation of visitation

agreements? At least get more structured visitation based on his

being a convicted felon with no apparent remorse and showing signs of

being emotionally unstable? I mean, I can see depositions from all

kinds of people who have seen first-hand how abusive he is--just last

week he ripped apart the school folks, right? Are you keeping track

of this all--if not, just go thru the archives here...you've got

names, dates, and posts outlining in detail about the stealing, etc...

> I told him that I was taking the kids home now. He said that they

> were taking a bath. I started to go and get them but he told me

> that I was not welcome. So I waited. >

That is so unreal. He wanders loose in your house, stealing food,

telling the kids all about how *you* kicked him out, and then treats

you like this at his house? Next time he came to my house, I'd be

sure he doesn't get past the porch. What a...

Please call your attorney...maybe an abuse hotline for ideas on

handling potential kidnapping actions? Just from the standpoint of

what this is doing to the kids emotionally, this has to be addressed

by the judge who oversees your divorce (are you divorced yet? I

forget where all that is)...I think the judge should REQUIRE Lou to

get psychological help...can your lawyer request that?

Raena

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I talked with my lawyer's aide this morning (for an hour and a half!) She

was very helpful and relayed a message to my lawyer who said simply, " Don't

let him have the kids. "

The aide pointed out that that was my legal right but might not help things.

We spent that hour and a half discussing all the possible approaches; she

said she was in favor of communication if at all possible and I must say I

am too. But it is hard to communicate with Lou.

Bolstered by the aide's ideas, I called Lou and told him that I objected to

last night. I told him that I had been on the phone with my lawyer and that

he had violated the visitation agreement. He tried to tell me that it had

all been Robbie and Putter's idea; I told him that that was fine but I would

like a phone call. I can be flexible. He said that he could not call

because Putter wanted to use the computer. I tried to call and the phone

just rang and rang; apparently he is online again and he has a dial up

connection. I had asked Sophie why he did not answer the phone and she said

it never rang which led me to believe that he had unplugged it or turned it

off. Apparently Mr. Putt was just online which I can believe. BUT he could

have made a quick phone call before letting Putter online. It does however

look less sinister like that, and I can imagine Putter screaming, " NO! NO!

Computer! Go away, Daddy! " Autistic tantrums are not pretty but the call

could have been very brief and I would have got the point pretty easily.

It remains my personal opinion that this was a planned bit of Salli Torture.

But it might have been cluelessness.

He tried to complain to me about taking the kids for Christmas to my

parents' house. I said I was not going to discuss that and hung. He has a

way of taking us so far off track that it is impossible to get to the

original topic.

The phone rang several times and I ignored it. Finally I heard his voice

over the answering machine, " I just want to know if I should take the big

boys for their work out? "

Well, perhaps. So I picked up the phone and told him that Enrique was not

feeling well enough but would go. Then he tried to return to the

topic of Christmas and I hung up.

He called again. I ignored it. Then I heard his voice saying something

like, " Look, I guess you just want to be treated with some respect and to

know what is going on. That's what I want to... "

This sounded promising so I picked up. He apologized, and said that he

would notifiy me as soon as possible in the future. I actually do believe

him. Remember nothing like this has happened before in almost four years of

separation. I think that this probably will not happen again. We were

perfectly civil with each other when we hung up the last time.

Salli

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Interesting how Lou became more conciliatory when you ignored him.

Maggie

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>maybe it's time to adhere to a more set and strict

> visitation schedule and just get him out of your life.

I thought of suggesting that...but I wonder if Lou wouldn't use that as an

excuse to himself to behave more abominably?

Jacquie

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>>>>>>>>

I call my lawyer tomorrow. If I am not welcome in his apartment, I assure

you all that he is not welcome in my house.

Salli

<<<<<<<<

I certainly hope that this is the case. Enough is enough. He's acting

worse than a 2 year old and should not be allowed to be with his children

until he learns how to behave.

Unfortunately, Salli, by reading this it's VERY obvious that he is bringing

Sophie into the middle of this. This is going to be very detrimental to

her, especially as she moves into adolescence. I hope you and your lawyer

can figure out a way to stop this.

Poor Sophie...the emotional toll is going to be devistating. I'm sorry to

be so blunt, but this man is not worthy of his children.

Penny :/

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DITTO.

Penny - still angry......

Re: Tortured

YOU are not welcome in HIS apartment? After HE sat strumming his guitar

and having his FEET WASHED in your dining room during Lent?

YOU are not welcome in HIS apartment when HE comes into your home and STEALS

FOOD?

You allow him broad and unlimited extremely generous time with his children,

and he keeps them late without a word to torture you?

Do call your lawyer. It is time to stop this man. Granted, he may be aspie

and unaware of social crap, but not all aspies are mean spirited,

vindictive, and spiteful. Aspies can be good or bad people just like any

one else. You can't let it influence your view of him any longer. He's

just plain an evil person.

(((hugs)))

Jacquie

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