Re: what a night! and morniong!

[Guest guest]

k is doing great. He is growing and that is very hard to do. I

remember being like that myself.

Cecilia from Perú, mom to Dessirée (05/07/99)

Lovely husband

_____

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-----Mensaje original-----

De: tamara laskowski

Enviado el: Martes, 29 de Abril de 2003 08:58 p.m.

Para: parenting_autism

Asunto: Re: what a night! and morniong!

WOW!! That is quite a connection.

Tamara

mom to Ebony, 5 years old, asd, adhd, bipolar

and , 2, polish (lol)

wife to Terry

>

>Reply-To: parenting_autism

>To: <parenting_autism >

>CC: " Janet "

>Subject: what a night! and morniong!

>Date: Tue, 29 Apr 2003 08:39:16 -0500

>

>

>Haven't read any of my messages yet; just had to get this down before I

>forgot some of it...

>

>Last evening, Marc and were playing on the video game. Now,

is

>MUCH better at this game than either Marc or I, and he's getting quite

>obnoxious about it. When the other person doesn't to as well as him,

he

>makes nasty snide comments that I guess he thinks are teasing.

>

>AFter a particularly nasty one he said to dh, I had some strong words

with

>him about the way he was talking. Two seconds later, dh said something

to

>ME, and sniped him again. I told him daddy was talking to me, and

>that he had no RIGHT to talk to peop,e the way he was talking.

>

>Well, he pounded upstairs to his room, SLAMMED the door, and began

wailing

>and screaming like a banshee. Completely out of proportion to what had

>just happened. It was a HUGE trantrum, bigger than we'd witnessed in a

>long long time.

>

> " You'd better go up there, " dh said, " or do you want me to? " " No, I'll

go.

> I was the one involved in this... "

>

>I went upstairs to find on his bed in a foetal position, his throw

rug

>over his head, wailing and sobbing. I sat on the bed, and soon he

stopped

>crying and started yelling at me for talking to him like that.

>

>I said, " But , you can't talk the way YOU did. It's not NICE to be

so

>mean when someone isn't as good at something as you are. It's also not

OK

>to get so angry when someone beats you at something. "

>

> " But I want to always WIN! "

>

>:I know, but that's not how it works. Sometimes you get to win, and

>sometimes other people get to win. That's how everyone has fun

together. "

>

>He freaked AGAIN! LOUDER! And then he wailed, 'THAT'S WHY I DON'T

HAVE

>ANY FRIENDS ANY MORE!!!! "

>

><oh my god>

>

> " What do you mean, you don't have any friends anymore? "

>

>So he told me this story about how he and Greg (his seatmate in class

and

>playmate) raced to the door at the end of recess and Greg won the race,

and

>so screamed, " YOU'RE NOT MY FRIEND ANY MORE! I HATE YOU! "

Obviously,

>Greg didn't speak to him for the rest of the day.

>

>I told him that if he wanted Greg to not be mad anymore, he needed to

>apologize tomorrow right away.

>

>AFter that he calmed down.

>

>This morning, he sat down with a piece of paper and wrote a note. I

can't

>transcribe it all here, but basically it said please come to my house

and

>play. I'm sorry I said you aren't my friend anymore. I love you.

>

>I am just entirely stunned. STUNNED!

>

>Jacquie

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Jacquie-

You are totally amazing.

Do you realize what you have done with this child!

Wow.

Penny :-D

what a night! and morniong!

Haven't read any of my messages yet; just had to get this down before I

forgot some of it...

[Guest guest]

does this help??

http://www.polyxo.com/socialstories/

M.G.mum to

Sebastian, 11 kinda quirky(NT)

Rowan, 6 extra quirky (ASD)

married to and living in Northern Ontario

Re: Re: what a night! and morniong!

> Maybe you need to write a list of rules for friendship for and tell

him

> if he follows these he will have more luck/fun with friends?

That's a VERY good idea, Sue!

Thanks!

Jacquie

-wondering where the heck to start....

[Guest guest]

> Maybe you need to write a list of rules for friendship for and tell

him

> if he follows these he will have more luck/fun with friends?

That's a VERY good idea, Sue!

Thanks!

Jacquie

-wondering where the heck to start....

[Guest guest]

> Wow WTG !! and good lesson Mom. Can you come teach my NT son who is 4

that EVERY toy in the house is NOT his pleaseeeeeeeeeee? I will feed you

lobster?

>

Oh, , I'd try, but I don't understand NTs! LOL.

Can I still have the lobster???? ;-)

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

Re: Re: what a night! and morniong!

>

> > Maybe you need to write a list of rules for friendship for and tell

> him

> > if he follows these he will have more luck/fun with friends?

>

>

> That's a VERY good idea, Sue!

>

> Thanks!

>

> Jacquie

> -wondering where the heck to start....

Hey, I never said I had ALL the answers.......;-)

Sue

[Guest guest]

Tony Attwood actually talked about this. He called it " winning the

Friendship game " , basically while if you don't win (or do) at a game and

learn to act gracefully, that you will have won the Friendship game. I'll

dig out my notes.

Penny :-D

Re: Re: what a night! and morniong!

> Maybe you need to write a list of rules for friendship for and tell

him

> if he follows these he will have more luck/fun with friends?

That's a VERY good idea, Sue!

Thanks!

Jacquie

-wondering where the heck to start....

[Guest guest]

> Tony Attwood actually talked about this. He called it " winning the

> Friendship game " , basically while if you don't win (or do) at a game and

> learn to act gracefully, that you will have won the Friendship game. I'll

> dig out my notes.

I read about that at Connections Centre.

Of course, learned to circumvent by saying, " thanks for letting me

lose, mom. "

<sigh>

Jacquie