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Re:Sharon and Donelle

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Sharon

You are so right about the low potassium, when I had that during chemo my

Onc was quite worried about that and stressed that it was life threatening.

It was good he told me because aside from the diarrhea and the usual chemo

tiredness I didn't feel as if I was at death's door.

Yes I too hope Donelle and Glenn's day went well was not too traumatic for

him or Donelle. I just hope his family behaved themselves. Yes the Lord is

celebrating His glorious feast with a remarkable crew from our group here

and more than a few from others groups and families as well. Your mom is in

good company.

Take care, am off to do some errands before I go to work at 1pm, already had

to wash two loads of clothes --- am out of underwear and slacks.. LOL..

Hopefully I will lose some weight soon and fit my jeans again. God Bless and

Hugs Jolene

_____

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Len, You are so very right about that. I have also noticed how often

I have to remind my Onc for this or that. But they have so many

patients that they just glance at your chart and wing it from there.

That can be dangerous if we are not careful. We all should take our

treatments and check and double check them. Love, Ingrid

> >

> > Sharon

> >

> > You are so right about the low potassium, when I had

> that during

> chemo my

> > Onc was quite worried about that and stressed that

> it was life

> threatening.

> > It was good he told me because aside from the

> diarrhea and the

> usual chemo

> > tiredness I didn't feel as if I was at death's door.

>

> >

> >

> >

> > Yes I too hope Donelle and Glenn's day went well was

> not too

> traumatic for

> > him or Donelle. I just hope his family behaved

> themselves. Yes

> the Lord is

> > celebrating His glorious feast with a remarkable

> crew from our

> group here

> > and more than a few from others groups and families

> as well. Your

> mom is in

> > good company.

> >

> > Take care, am off to do some errands before I go to

> work at 1pm,

> already had

> > to wash two loads of clothes --- am out of underwear

> and slacks..

> LOL..

> > Hopefully I will lose some weight soon and fit my

> jeans again. God

> Bless and

> > Hugs Jolene

> >

> >

> >

> > _____

> >

> >

> >

> > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> removed]

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

> For an an extensive collection of colon cancer related

> links go to

> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links

> or

> http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

>

> yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links or

> http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

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When I see my onc again will ask him if there is anything he forgot to tell

me. Duh! I can plead ignorance to the MRI, say what MRI, no one told me

about it. LOL. I just have to find time to do it now. My bones ache

especially tonight. Have two more days and I will be off for the weekend.

Have two gals out sick from fabric department. Hope I don't get it. Hugs to

all Jolene

Re:Sharon and Donelle

Len, You are so very right about that. I have also noticed how often

I have to remind my Onc for this or that. But they have so many

patients that they just glance at your chart and wing it from there.

That can be dangerous if we are not careful. We all should take our

treatments and check and double check them. Love, Ingrid

> >

> > Sharon

> >

> > You are so right about the low potassium, when I had

> that during

> chemo my

> > Onc was quite worried about that and stressed that

> it was life

> threatening.

> > It was good he told me because aside from the

> diarrhea and the

> usual chemo

> > tiredness I didn't feel as if I was at death's door.

>

> >

> >

> >

> > Yes I too hope Donelle and Glenn's day went well was

> not too

> traumatic for

> > him or Donelle. I just hope his family behaved

> themselves. Yes

> the Lord is

> > celebrating His glorious feast with a remarkable

> crew from our

> group here

> > and more than a few from others groups and families

> as well. Your

> mom is in

> > good company.

> >

> > Take care, am off to do some errands before I go to

> work at 1pm,

> already had

> > to wash two loads of clothes --- am out of underwear

> and slacks..

> LOL..

> > Hopefully I will lose some weight soon and fit my

> jeans again. God

> Bless and

> > Hugs Jolene

> >

> >

> >

> > _____

> >

> >

> >

> > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> removed]

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

> For an an extensive collection of colon cancer related

> links go to

> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links

> or

> http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

>

> yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links or

> http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

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Len & Ingrid,

You are 100% correct about being on guard. Mom often heard things

very differently from what I did. Often no explanation was given,

and Mom, bless her, never wanted to " put anyone out " or question the

doctors. I was on offense as much as possible, but Mom would get

mad if she thought I was too tough on the docs.

I still believe that Mom would have lived longer(but maybe for the

worse)if the docs had not been so blunt. The radiation onc said he

was going to waste his time on small spots; the onc told her that

her CEA was over 1000 ( this was 4 weeks after it was below 40), and

the PCP told her it was time to call in hospice. Not one of them

ever addressed her deep depression that had been there for months.

I'm not saying this would have changed the outcome, but it might

have given her some " good " time. I just can't seem to let go of my

resentment of the docs.

Sorry, still venting after 8 months.

Sharon

- In colon_cancer_support , " Ingrid Lowe "

<lowenco@h...> wrote:

>

> Len, You are so very right about that. I have also noticed how

often

> I have to remind my Onc for this or that. But they have so many

> patients that they just glance at your chart and wing it from

there.

> That can be dangerous if we are not careful. We all should take

our

> treatments and check and double check them. Love, Ingrid

>

>

>

>

> > >

> > > Sharon

> > >

> > > You are so right about the low potassium, when I had

> > that during

> > chemo my

> > > Onc was quite worried about that and stressed that

> > it was life

> > threatening.

> > > It was good he told me because aside from the

> > diarrhea and the

> > usual chemo

> > > tiredness I didn't feel as if I was at death's door.

> >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > Yes I too hope Donelle and Glenn's day went well was

> > not too

> > traumatic for

> > > him or Donelle. I just hope his family behaved

> > themselves. Yes

> > the Lord is

> > > celebrating His glorious feast with a remarkable

> > crew from our

> > group here

> > > and more than a few from others groups and families

> > as well. Your

> > mom is in

> > > good company.

> > >

> > > Take care, am off to do some errands before I go to

> > work at 1pm,

> > already had

> > > to wash two loads of clothes --- am out of underwear

> > and slacks..

> > LOL..

> > > Hopefully I will lose some weight soon and fit my

> > jeans again. God

> > Bless and

> > > Hugs Jolene

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > _____

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> > removed]

> > >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > For an an extensive collection of colon cancer related

> > links go to

> > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links

> > or

> > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> >

> > yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links or

> > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

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Dear Sharon,

You are absolutely correct that had Your mom been given any hope it might have

changed the outcome or at least given her more time. It is very well known that

people without hope just give up. Studies have proven that people that have

hope, purpose, plan for a future & are positive about their lives have better

outcomes & longer survival rates. Why do some doctors have to take that away

from people? Why can't they be honest without destroying all hope? Why not

say " we will do all that we can. Don't stop fighting there is always hope " ? Or

tell people " statistically these are the facts, but I have seen people beat the

odds before don't give up hope. " I know a man " Cliff Beckwith " that was

diagnosed fifteen years ago with stage 4 PC & was given a few months to live as

doctors said there was nothing that could be done. If Cliff had listened to the

doctors he would have died a long time age. He didn't give up he searched for

answers & found the Budwig Protocol. Not only is he

alive fifteen years later he has established a yahoo group & helps others on

this journey find the answers they are searching for. What a waste of a

compassionate, useful, beautiful human being if he had just done what the

doctors told him to do (die in a few months). I am so sorry that you are

suffering the loss of your mother & feeling such resentment towards her doctors.

You must find a way to release those feelings & free yourself from any guilt.

It sounds as though you were a devoted & loving daughter to her & I'm sure she

saw everyday how very much you loved her.

Sincerely,

Trase

tarcav23 wrote:

Len & Ingrid,

You are 100% correct about being on guard. Mom often heard things

very differently from what I did. Often no explanation was given,

and Mom, bless her, never wanted to " put anyone out " or question the

doctors. I was on offense as much as possible, but Mom would get

mad if she thought I was too tough on the docs.

I still believe that Mom would have lived longer(but maybe for the

worse)if the docs had not been so blunt. The radiation onc said he

was going to waste his time on small spots; the onc told her that

her CEA was over 1000 ( this was 4 weeks after it was below 40), and

the PCP told her it was time to call in hospice. Not one of them

ever addressed her deep depression that had been there for months.

I'm not saying this would have changed the outcome, but it might

have given her some " good " time. I just can't seem to let go of my

resentment of the docs.

Sorry, still venting after 8 months.

Sharon

- In colon_cancer_support , " Ingrid Lowe "

<lowenco@h...> wrote:

>

> Len, You are so very right about that. I have also noticed how

often

> I have to remind my Onc for this or that. But they have so many

> patients that they just glance at your chart and wing it from

there.

> That can be dangerous if we are not careful. We all should take

our

> treatments and check and double check them. Love, Ingrid

>

>

>

>

> > >

> > > Sharon

> > >

> > > You are so right about the low potassium, when I had

> > that during

> > chemo my

> > > Onc was quite worried about that and stressed that

> > it was life

> > threatening.

> > > It was good he told me because aside from the

> > diarrhea and the

> > usual chemo

> > > tiredness I didn't feel as if I was at death's door.

> >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > Yes I too hope Donelle and Glenn's day went well was

> > not too

> > traumatic for

> > > him or Donelle. I just hope his family behaved

> > themselves. Yes

> > the Lord is

> > > celebrating His glorious feast with a remarkable

> > crew from our

> > group here

> > > and more than a few from others groups and families

> > as well. Your

> > mom is in

> > > good company.

> > >

> > > Take care, am off to do some errands before I go to

> > work at 1pm,

> > already had

> > > to wash two loads of clothes --- am out of underwear

> > and slacks..

> > LOL..

> > > Hopefully I will lose some weight soon and fit my

> > jeans again. God

> > Bless and

> > > Hugs Jolene

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > _____

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> > removed]

> > >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > For an an extensive collection of colon cancer related

> > links go to

> > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links

> > or

> > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> >

> > yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links or

> > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

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Sharon, I am so sorry that your mom's doctors did not treat you and

your mom with more heart. But I also understand that the doctors

cannot give false hope. Just wish they would at least not be so

morbid.

Doctors should by now know that there is always some hope. Even if

it is just a glimmer, there has been miralces that have occured

before. Even they should know that.

Seems that the cancer doctors now a days are so busy making the

almighty dollar that they forget that they are treating humans who

have feelings and a soul. Not all doctors are like this but some are.

I know that when I am nervous and scared at a doctors visit, the

way the doctor talks to me and tells me what to expect is how my

feelings will be. We all depend on the doctor so much and the way

they interact with us can cause us to give the fight up or try to

fight this.

I hope and Pray that you can find some peace within yourself and

know that your mom is looking down on you and wanting you to be Happy

and Peaceful. Love, ingrid

> > > >

> > > > Sharon

> > > >

> > > > You are so right about the low potassium, when I had

> > > that during

> > > chemo my

> > > > Onc was quite worried about that and stressed that

> > > it was life

> > > threatening.

> > > > It was good he told me because aside from the

> > > diarrhea and the

> > > usual chemo

> > > > tiredness I didn't feel as if I was at death's door.

> > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > Yes I too hope Donelle and Glenn's day went well was

> > > not too

> > > traumatic for

> > > > him or Donelle. I just hope his family behaved

> > > themselves. Yes

> > > the Lord is

> > > > celebrating His glorious feast with a remarkable

> > > crew from our

> > > group here

> > > > and more than a few from others groups and families

> > > as well. Your

> > > mom is in

> > > > good company.

> > > >

> > > > Take care, am off to do some errands before I go to

> > > work at 1pm,

> > > already had

> > > > to wash two loads of clothes --- am out of underwear

> > > and slacks..

> > > LOL..

> > > > Hopefully I will lose some weight soon and fit my

> > > jeans again. God

> > > Bless and

> > > > Hugs Jolene

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > _____

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> > > removed]

> > > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > For an an extensive collection of colon cancer related

> > > links go to

> > > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links

> > > or

> > > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> > >

> > > yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links or

> > > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

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Dear Trase,

Why is it that docs think they are giving false hope? Your words

are so much kinder and yet still convey the situation. I know that

I have to let go, but I'd really like to see the docs develope some

compassion.

Sharon

> > > >

> > > > Sharon

> > > >

> > > > You are so right about the low potassium, when I had

> > > that during

> > > chemo my

> > > > Onc was quite worried about that and stressed that

> > > it was life

> > > threatening.

> > > > It was good he told me because aside from the

> > > diarrhea and the

> > > usual chemo

> > > > tiredness I didn't feel as if I was at death's door.

> > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > Yes I too hope Donelle and Glenn's day went well was

> > > not too

> > > traumatic for

> > > > him or Donelle. I just hope his family behaved

> > > themselves. Yes

> > > the Lord is

> > > > celebrating His glorious feast with a remarkable

> > > crew from our

> > > group here

> > > > and more than a few from others groups and families

> > > as well. Your

> > > mom is in

> > > > good company.

> > > >

> > > > Take care, am off to do some errands before I go to

> > > work at 1pm,

> > > already had

> > > > to wash two loads of clothes --- am out of underwear

> > > and slacks..

> > > LOL..

> > > > Hopefully I will lose some weight soon and fit my

> > > jeans again. God

> > > Bless and

> > > > Hugs Jolene

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > _____

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> > > removed]

> > > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > For an an extensive collection of colon cancer related

> > > links go to

> > > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links

> > > or

> > > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> > >

> > > yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links or

> > > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

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Share on other sites

Re:Sharon and Donelle

Dear Trase,

Why is it that docs think they are giving false hope? Your words

are so much kinder and yet still convey the situation. I know that

I have to let go, but I'd really like to see the docs develope some

compassion.

Sharon

> > > >

> > > > Sharon

> > > >

> > > > You are so right about the low potassium, when I had

> > > that during

> > > chemo my

> > > > Onc was quite worried about that and stressed that

> > > it was life

> > > threatening.

> > > > It was good he told me because aside from the

> > > diarrhea and the

> > > usual chemo

> > > > tiredness I didn't feel as if I was at death's door.

> > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > Yes I too hope Donelle and Glenn's day went well was

> > > not too

> > > traumatic for

> > > > him or Donelle. I just hope his family behaved

> > > themselves. Yes

> > > the Lord is

> > > > celebrating His glorious feast with a remarkable

> > > crew from our

> > > group here

> > > > and more than a few from others groups and families

> > > as well. Your

> > > mom is in

> > > > good company.

> > > >

> > > > Take care, am off to do some errands before I go to

> > > work at 1pm,

> > > already had

> > > > to wash two loads of clothes --- am out of underwear

> > > and slacks..

> > > LOL..

> > > > Hopefully I will lose some weight soon and fit my

> > > jeans again. God

> > > Bless and

> > > > Hugs Jolene

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > _____

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> > > removed]

> > > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > For an an extensive collection of colon cancer related

> > > links go to

> > > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links

> > > or

> > > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> > >

> > > yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links or

> > > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

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On the OTHER hand when Phil began bleeding last month he had emergency

colonoscopies and endoscopies to try to find the source. As the bleeding was

from the liver they did not find it. And it had stopped for the moment. 3 GI

doctors all proceeded to tell him this was NOT a big deal.

I remember Joyce called me to warn me differently and I must admit I had some

false hope because (forgive me Joyce) but 3 doctors should know more right?

The following week Phil went to the oncologist who told him he was (and he used

stronger language) furious with those doctors for giving false hope. He then

told him You ARE amazing Phil and there is always the chance of a miracle but

barring that it really looks as if we have reached the end of the journey and

that you only have weeks.

Was it rough? OF COURSE but I always wonder WHY the doctors were not honest.

Compassion is appreciated but honesty just as much. I so felt for our oncologist

Dr. Rothman who not only had to break the news to us but had to tell Phil that a

doctor we had trusted for 3 years basically lied to make him feel better. Poor

Dr. Rothman had formed so close a relationship with Phil that he had to step out

of the examining room 3 times while trying to tell him. He so wanted Phil to

beat the odds. And he felt completely helpless!! He was not harsh but he was

honest and caring and never sugar coated the truth.

My son Dan and I have a different doctor for our testing who is a colo-rectal

surgeon rather than the GI guys who worked on Phil.

Narice

Re:Sharon and Donelle

Dear Trase,

Why is it that docs think they are giving false hope? Your words

are so much kinder and yet still convey the situation. I know that

I have to let go, but I'd really like to see the docs develope some

compassion.

Sharon

> > > >

> > > > Sharon

> > > >

> > > > You are so right about the low potassium, when I had

> > > that during

> > > chemo my

> > > > Onc was quite worried about that and stressed that

> > > it was life

> > > threatening.

> > > > It was good he told me because aside from the

> > > diarrhea and the

> > > usual chemo

> > > > tiredness I didn't feel as if I was at death's door.

> > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > Yes I too hope Donelle and Glenn's day went well was

> > > not too

> > > traumatic for

> > > > him or Donelle. I just hope his family behaved

> > > themselves. Yes

> > > the Lord is

> > > > celebrating His glorious feast with a remarkable

> > > crew from our

> > > group here

> > > > and more than a few from others groups and families

> > > as well. Your

> > > mom is in

> > > > good company.

> > > >

> > > > Take care, am off to do some errands before I go to

> > > work at 1pm,

> > > already had

> > > > to wash two loads of clothes --- am out of underwear

> > > and slacks..

> > > LOL..

> > > > Hopefully I will lose some weight soon and fit my

> > > jeans again. God

> > > Bless and

> > > > Hugs Jolene

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > _____

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> > > removed]

> > > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > For an an extensive collection of colon cancer related

> > > links go to

> > > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links

> > > or

> > > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> > >

> > > yahoo.com/group/colon_cancer_support/links or

> > > http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/suthercon/

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

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