Re: Share room or not - eternal dilemma

[Guest guest]

What we are planning to do (when we tackle this in a month or so is

to put the travel cot in DD1's room and keep the cot in ours. The idea

is that initially DD2 will sleep in DD1's room during the day (gets DD1

used to the idea of leaving her alone and DD2 used to some 'noise') and

in with us at night.

Then at some point swap the cots over so that DD2 will sleep with DD1

wherever possible, but leaving the possibility of her sleeping in with

us if ill/likely to disturb/etc.

As I said - this is just a plan ATM, but it might work...

Oh - sudden thought - could you put a curtain or screen in the other

room so they couldn't see each other? Would this help?

....

--

Helen Armfield

helen@...

[Guest guest]

It might help them bond - e.g. DD can entertain DS in the morning if

they wake early? Depends on how well they get on, also on your long

term plans, where will they sleep in 3 years time? Will you for example

have bunk beds in the one room? IMVHO if you are planning for them to

sleep in the same room in the future - well you have to start sometime.

My 2 DDs (3 yrs apart) have always slept in separate rooms - we have

been fortunate (in 1 way) to have the space - *however they find it

difficult to adjust to sleeping in the same room on holiday, or if

staying with friends. And as for sleeping in the same bed (a double one,

in a quad room en route to holiday destination) - they were scandalised

!

I know people who deliberately put their children into the same

bedroom, even if they have enough space for separate rooms - then make

one of the rooms into a playroom

Barbara

> I just quarrelled (debated, sorry) with DH yet again about where to

> move DS' cot. DS is going to be 15 months this coming week and we are

[Guest guest]

We always put our kids together, at least until they were older teens.

We had three small boys in one room for quite a while, my foster son

, Azariah, and baby Yeshaya from a very young age indeed. (about

4 months). He learned to sleep through *anything*, including the two

boys, aged 9 running total riot in the bedroom as they always did last

thing at night and first thing in the morning. LOL he can still sleep

through anything including all alarm clocks, a good bash on the head,

several attempts to drag him out of bed, and removal of his covers. So

far the only thing that works is a bucket of water poured over his

head.

We get so hung up about the kids waking each other up, but in places

like Israel where the norm is to have loads of kids and only two or

three bedroom apartments, kids sleep all over the place, including the

living room, and learn to sleep through a medium sized earthquake!

Ruthie

[Guest guest]

<<<I know people who deliberately put their children into the same

<bedroom, even if they have enough space for separate rooms - then <make one of

the rooms into a playroom>>>

Kind of our situation though we did not initially intend for them to share a

room, had a very bad evening with both of them and at the end in desperation put

dd2 in her travel cot into dd1's room and left them to it. dd1 climbed into

dd2's cot (she was 8 months at the time) and they fell asleep within 15 mins

cuddling each other. the next evening I tried to put dd2 back into her own room

only to be told very sternly from dd1 NO mummy elisa (what she calls Eloisa) in

MY ROOM.. and that kind of was it. after 4 nights we put dd2's cot into the bed

room and they have shared ever since, they get a lot of enjoyment out of it and

some evening yes they do keep each other awake for a while but it is mainly

giggles and rarely fights. and I often come upstairs and find them both snuggled

up fast asleep in dd1's bed.. I think it took a couple of months before the one

room became a bedroom and the other a playroom, but the current plan is baby

will share with them once s/he moves out of our bedroom. And we have actually

got a 4th bedroom that we could use if we wanted to (currently a guestroom and

store room) but we have decided against it. The sleeping arrangements works well

and whilst they happened kind of accidental I would recommend the kids sleeping

in the same room for us at least it has worked really well..

Lonnie Phoebe & Eloisa's mama

& expecting a Christmas delivery...

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what you

start.

So far today, I have finished 2 bags of chips and a Chocolate cake.

I feel better already.

[Guest guest]

Yes, I was going to ask you Ruthie, I was wondering whether you had 8

separate bedrooms/nurseries for them :-) But I wouldn't mind them

sharing when he's older when at least I can talk to him - but now

he's in that limbo stage, not old enough to understand and not little

enough to be 'fooled'...

I guess it's just the 'will learn to sleep through' phase that

frightens me - how long is that interruption going to take before it

supposedly gets better I wonder. After nearly 15 months of having

very little success with getting DS to sleep through anything at all

I am so happy whenever he sleeps through the night that I just

couldn't bear him being woken up by DD as well.

And no I haven't been too protective of him either... he's the worlds

sunniest baby with a huge smile for everyone, and lots and lots of

laughter - but he is also just a terribly sensitive type and can't

cope with any form of ache, pain, loneliness, cough - especially not

at night. I guess also he's going through some form of separation

anxiety at the moment.

Last night he cried from 3 to 5 again - ie gets comforted, wakes up

again, gets comforted, wakes up again, repeat ad inifinitum. If only

I knew whether he is just missing me, or has earache, or has food

allergies and gets stomach cramps or whatever.

Aarghhh.

Karina

> We always put our kids together, at least until they were older

teens.

>

[Guest guest]

For a light sleeper I read in a book once Toddler Taming!?! that to " cure " a

light sleeper, you should put a radio on very low in the same room the child

is sleeping in, and each night turn the volume up a little, until they can

sleep with the radio playing at a quiet/normal level.

I know it's not oververly practical as you share a room at present, but

maybe worth a thought?

Joanne King

SAHM to Ethan - HB 29.06.00

Minute Secretary Colchester & District

[Guest guest]

>

> I guess it's just the 'will learn to sleep through' phase that

> frightens me - how long is that interruption going to take before it

> supposedly gets better I wonder. After nearly 15 months of having

> very little success with getting DS to sleep through anything at all

> I am so happy whenever he sleeps through the night that I just

> couldn't bear him being woken up by DD as well.

We put our two in together when DD2 went into a bed at 18 months,

before that she had been in her own room in her cot. DD1 had been

asking for Susy to come in her room for a while and had not been too

great at settling as she felt " all alone " in her room (age 3 ish at

this point)

For a while (month or so) after they were in together the bedtime

settling was awful!! they were so excited about being together, but

ignoring the mania and a few threats to DD1 that 2 would go back to

her room eventually did the trick. We really didn;t *want* to renege

on the agreement as by this time we were thinking about #3 and while

we have 4 bedrooms, we wanted to keep one (albeit the smallest one) as

a guest room as our parents often stay.

Despite the evening shenanigans the mornings became *much* better,

combined with a bunny clock, the girls left us alone much more as they

would play because there were 2 or them, DD2 has the potential to

sleep longer that DD1 and when this happens DD1 will often come into

us, which is fine when it's just the one!!

Even when one has been upset or sick, it rarely disturbs the other

(and DD2 was never a good sleeper!!) I think they get used to it.

However occasionally we get mornings like this morning, when they wake

fighting:-)) but were they in sep rooms the same thing would happen as

they would gravitate to one room or the other.

In general they love sharing a room, it makes for easy

bedtime/storytime now, and they often chat for a while at bedtime.

which is highly amusing. It also does make it easy when we go away as

they are used to room sharing.

I guess this doesn;t help too much... but in summary, it was hardish

for a while but is definitely worth it for our two now.

(and as #3 looks like being male he will have his own room, and thus

it will stay till the girls demand their own space inthe preteen

stage -when the spare room will go.....!!)

Angi