Humor: How to Keep a Healthy Level of Insanity

[Guest guest]

I thought we could all use a laugh today. :-) Read below my signature.

Debbie with twins

- Jordan (ASD) 2.5yo

- (NT) 2.5yo

How To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a

hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries

with

that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it " in "

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has Gotten

over

their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write " for sexual favors " .

7. Finish all your sentences with " in accordance with the prophecy. "

8. Dont use any punctuation marks

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

11. Specify that your drive-through order is " to go " .

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle

sounds all day.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party

because you're not in the mood.

16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard

Kim.

17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream " I won! " , " I won! " " 3rd

time

this week!!!!! "

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling

" run for your lives, they're loose!! "

19. Tell your children over dinner. " due to the economy, we are going to

have to let one of you go. "

And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity.......

20. Send this e-mail to everyone in your address book, even if they sent

it

to you or asked you not to send them stuff like this.

[Guest guest]

ROTFLMAO

If I had gotten it in my email, I would have deleted it. I don't

read forwards but this one was so cute, thanks for posting it.

>

>

> How To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity

>

> 1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and

point a

> hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

>

> 2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

>

> 3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want

fries

> with

> that.

>

> 4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it " in "

>

> 5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has

Gotten

> over

> their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

>

> 6. In the memo field of all your checks, write " for sexual favors " .

>

> 7. Finish all your sentences with " in accordance with the prophecy. "

>

> 8. Dont use any punctuation marks

>

> 9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

>

> 10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they

answer.

>

> 11. Specify that your drive-through order is " to go " .

>

> 12. Sing along at the opera.

>

> 13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

>

> 14. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of

jungle

> sounds all day.

>

> 15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their

party

> because you're not in the mood.

>

> 16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock

Hard

> Kim.

>

> 17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream " I won! " , " I won! " " 3rd

> time

> this week!!!!! "

>

> 18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot,

yelling

> " run for your lives, they're loose!! "

>

> 19. Tell your children over dinner. " due to the economy, we are

going to

> have to let one of you go. "

>

> And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity.......

>

> 20. Send this e-mail to everyone in your address book, even if they

sent

> it

> to you or asked you not to send them stuff like this.

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

ROFL!!!

Thanks, I needed that.

Tuna

>>>>>>>> >

I thought we could all use a laugh today. :-)

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

=====

mom to:

, 8, ASD

, 4, NT

Normal is just a setting on the washing machine.

- Whoopi Goldberg

______________________________________________________________________

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