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>

>

> > 1. Give me a sentence about a public servant, " said a teacher. The

small

> > boy wrote: " The fireman came down the ladder pregnant. " The teacher took

> the

> > lad aside to correct him. " Don't you know what pregnant means? " she

> asked.

> > " Sure, " said the young boy confidently. " Means carrying a child. "

> >

> > 2. A grandmother was surprised by her 7-year-old grandson one morning.

> He

> > had made her coffee. She drank what was the worst cup of coffee in her

> life.

> > When she got to the bottom, there were three of those little green army

> men

> > in the cup. She said, " Honey, what are the army men doing in my

coffee? "

> Her

> > grandson said, " Grandma, it says on TV, 'The best part of waking up is

> > soldiers in your cup!' "

> >

> > 3. Susie Sunshine asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of

their

> > favorite Bible stories. She was puzzled by Jimmy's picture which showed

> four

> > people on an airplane, so she asked him which story it was meant to

> > represent. " The flight to Egypt, " said Jimmy. " I see...And that must

be

> > , ph, and Baby Jesus, " Ms. Susie said. " But who's the fourth

> > person? " " Oh, that's Pontius-the Pilot. "

> >

> > 4. An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief,

> > finally asked him, " How do you expect to get into heaven? " The boy

thought

> it

> > over and said, " Well, I'll just run in and out and in and out and keep

> > slamming the door until St. says, 'For heaven's sake, Jimmy, come

> in

> > or stay out.' "

> >

> > 5. A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids

> home

> > one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the

> fire

> > truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's

> duties.

> > " They use him to keep crowds back, " said one youngster. " No, " said

> another,

> > " he's just for good luck. " A third child brought the argument to a

close.

> > " They use the dogs, " she said firmly, " to find the fire hydrant. "

> >

> > 6. Little ny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream

> on

> > her face. " Why do you do that, mommy? " he asked. " To make myself

> > beautiful, " said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a

> tissue.

> > " What's the matter? " asked Little ny. " Giving up? "

> >

>

>

>

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