Daughters

[Guest guest]

Dear Sharon,

RE: "My daughter does not want tosee how my health has gone downhill, but this is timefor her to look very honestly at me"

I don't know if it's a mother/daughter thing or what, but I went thru a time when I just couldn't accept my mother's decline in health. My own daughter (whose daughter my husband and I are practically raising) can't or doesn't want to accept what's happened to me. She likes to keep a safe distance so she doesn't have to deal with it. But I remember having a similar attitude with my mom. Mother passed away Dec. 5, died in her sleep at the age of 87. But I remember a week last April when I stayed with her. I was just feeling the affects of Cytoxan and mostly laid on her couch. She talked a lot about accepting things because that's just the way it is sometimes. Now I know where I got my faith from. She taught me a lot that week. And probably all my life, but I wasn't listening as well! We daughters are a complicated lot and all I can do is pray for mine!

[Guest guest]

--- wrote:

> I don't know if it's a mother/daughter thing or

> what, but I went thru a time when I just couldn't

> accept my mother's decline in health. My own

> daughter (whose daughter my husband and I are

> practically raising) can't or doesn't want to accept

> what's happened to me. She likes to keep a safe

> distance so she doesn't have to deal with it. But I

> remember having a similar attitude with my mom.

> Mother passed away Dec. 5, died in her sleep at the

> age of 87. But I remember a week last April when I

> stayed with her. I was just feeling the affects of

> Cytoxan and mostly laid on her couch. She talked a

> lot about accepting things because that's just the

> way it is sometimes. Now I know where I got my

> faith from. She taught me a lot that week. And

> probably all my life, but I wasn't listening as

> well! We daughters are a complicated lot and all I

> can do is pray for mine!

>

>

Hi ,

I think most of us tend to do that-distance ourselves

from our mothers/parents illnesses. I can remember

when I was taking care of my parents and thinking they

were not as sick/in as much pain as they led us to

believe. My parents had always been such strong

people, and I just couldn't accept what was happening

to them. So, I do understand my daughters position.

Also, it is partially my responsibility because I tend

not to talk to any of my children about my disease.

Don't want to give them the " organ recital " , know what

I mean? I love my daughter with all my heart and she

and I are close, except when it comes to my being

sick. She really closes me out about talking about

it-or at least I feel she does. And yes, I do pray

for mine also! It is the best thing we can do for our

children!

Love, Sharon

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