's wisdom

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> Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00> > apiece on those little> > > bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian> > backwards. NAIVE> > >> > > Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant> > like making a peeing> > section> > > in a swimming pool?> > >> > > OK...so if the ville Jaguars are known as> > the "Jags" and the Tampa> > > Bay> > > Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs", what does> > that make the Tennessee> > > Titans ?> > >> > > If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does> > that mean that one> > enjoys> > > it?> > >> > > There are three religious truths:> > > 1. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.> > > 2. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the> > leader of the Christian> > > faith.> > > 3. Mormons do not recognize each other in the> > liquor store.> > >> > > If you take an Oriental person and spin him> > around several times, does he> > > become disoriented?> > >> > > If people from Poland are called Poles, why> > aren't people from Holland> > > called> > > Holes?> > >> > > Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a> > whack?> > >> > > Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy> > adultery?> > >> > > If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?> > >> > > If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?> > >> > > When someone asks you, "A penny for your> > thoughts" and you put your two> > > cents> > > in . . . what happens to the other penny?> > >> > > Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't> > they just stale bread> > to> > > begin with?> > >> > > If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked,> > doesn't it follow that> > > electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted,> > cowboys deranged,> > models> > > deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners> > depressed?> > >> > > If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call> > it Fed UP?> > >> > > Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?> > >> > > What hair color do they put on the driver's> > licenses of bald men?> > >> > > I thought about how mothers feed their babies> > with tiny little spoons and> > > forks so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use?> > Toothpicks?> > >> > > If it's true that we are here to help others,> > then what exactly are the> > > others here for?> > >> > > You never really learn to swear until you learn> > to drive.> > >> > > Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the> > Post Office? What are we> > > supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they> > just put their pictures on> > > the> > > postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them> > while they deliver the> > > mail?