TO: but all please read!

[Guest guest]

Hey :

Your post really pulled at my heart strings. I have been exactly

where you are before. Thinking my family would be better off

without me, etc. etc. etc. What is the saying " been there done

that? "

I still have days (the bad days) when I still think the same thing.

But, the way I decided to finally look at it is that this disease is

certainly not for wimps is it? God said he would not put more on us

than we could bear. So, the way I look at it is that God must

think I am awfully strong! But, I will be honest on the days when

the pain gets bad and when I get an SOD spasm that is also a " 50 "

all that logic goes out the window until the pain is gone. That is

just human nature.

, I know you take care of tons of patients and you can't

remember them but believe me the patients remember their caregivers,

good or bad and I remember the good care that you gave me and the

conversations about this horrible disease and I never knew at the

time that you had it. That in itself is a testimony as to the kind

and caring person that you are. Having to listen to a

patient " whine and moan " and you are sick yourself. God knows, the

medical profession needs more folks just like you. If you can't

work in that particular capacity as a nurse maybe you can take a

nursing job in a different department that is not as stressful. But

plesae don't think that anyone especially your family would be

better off without you! I am a firm believer that we are on this

earth for a purpose and the trials we go through give us the wisdom

to help someone else!

I certainly know the despair of that horrible pain ............ I

call it the " pain from the sky " that comes from nowhere with no

warning! Its at those times I too would like to just give up. But

that is the pain talking. Before I found out what this was and

before I actually got pancreatitis I had the SOD spasms for 14 YEARS

and the docs were telling me it was irritable bowel. Only after I

got hte pancreatitis and went to MUSC did they put two and two

together and figure out those pains were SOD spasms. I have been

hauled off in an ambulance so many times you cannot imagine only to

have the pain leave as quick as it came and most of hte time before

I got to the hospital. At one point it was so bad and with the

limited medical knowledge I have from doing transcription, I figured

I had an aneurysm that was just blowing and I was going to die. I

and everybody else does know what you are going through! You are

certainly not alone here. Lots of times my pain starts in my right

ear and down my right jaw before it ever hits my abdomen. Try

telling that to a doc!!!!!!!!!!! Sometimes it feels like my ear

drum is going to blow and my ear is still sore the next day. I am

beginning to think my nerves are wired wrong! ha-ha.

Long story short, your family needs you, the medical professin

certainly needs your compassion and expertise in pancreatitis and

this group needs you too!

You are in my prayers for a pain free day. One pain free day at a

time!

God bless

Kaye