Re: Cant seem to shake this guilt

[Guest guest]

,

Have you thought about putting it all in all writing and mailing it off to yours

siblings. This way you can free yourself of the guilt and you don't have to

talk to them. Just write one letter, print off several copies and off they go

in the mail. Leave it up to them to do with the info. as they choose. If you

write in a letter you won't have to deal with them and they can respond or not.

Free yourself of the guilt and get it off your chest. Maybe start your New Year

off this way. This is a burden that you do not need to bear. Think of yourself

first because obviously they won't. I wish you the best in what ever you choose

to do but I just thought mailing them the info, gets the burden off of you, and

then the info is theirs to deal with.

Lots of Luck!

Simi Valley, CA

Cant seem to shake this guilt

Some of ya'll may know that I have not spoken to my siblings in well

over a year.

[Guest guest]

,

I wanted to reply that I too have had my share of problems with my

family. I have written about them quite recently. And I am " not " sick

in their eyes as I have not survived cancer like my mom. And please,

believe that I am not taking anything away from my mom. She is a

survivior and I'm happy for that. But what I have is a disease too. I

wish that they could realize that.

Anyway, when I mentioned to my sister one day that since my CP is

idiopathic, it could turn out to be herditary from our mother or father

and I worry for the rest of my siblings that they don't get it. She

couldn't have been more offended that I even mentioned this

possibility. My CP is ONLY from a bad surgery and couldn't possibly be

hereditary in any POSSIBLE form!!! Ok, no problem I will never mention

that again. But this from a 42 year old woman that hasn't even had her

first mamogram even after our mother having a masectomy 4 years ago.

Your siblings won't care one way or another to what you have to say

regarding your health or your concerns for theirs. It just won't sink

in to any of them at all. And there isn't anything you can do for them

to prevent this in the first place. They know youre sick. They know

you have a disease. And they know there's a chance that they too could

have it, but they won't let themselves realize this or think about it.

So don't feel guilt over something you have no control over in the first

place. Give yourself a break from all the stress and go see a shrink if

it helps. I did over my family problems and it empowered me like I

could have never imagined.

Sandy/California

>

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[Guest guest]

Hi,

One idea: mail them a card with a letter. In the letter you can inform

them of the possibility of the hereditary nature of your pancreatitis

and that you are sharing this with them because you do not want to

withhold information that they may find useful. You can suggest that

your siblings share this info with their family doctors just so it is

included in their histories and then their docs can decide if some

basic testing should be done. This way you are not withholding

important information but you also do not have to tell it to them face

to face which would be hard to do emotionally and might not be well

received. You can do this in a business-like fashion keeping the

emotions out of the letter. You will feel the emotions but you can

avoid voicing them in the letter.

Its just an idea and what I would do if I were in your shoes.

Happy New years!

Bert