Top 8 Morons of 2001

[Guest guest]

Gosh I really shouldn't be sending this, I'm from Calif and I actually do

remember some of there. LOL

> > Here are some people who should be nominated for the Darwin awards,

> > unfortunately it appears these morons didn't remove themselves from the

> > gene

> > pool.

> >

> >>

> >> 1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP?

> >> AT & T FIRED President Walter after nine months, saying he lacked

> >> intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package.

> >> Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.

> >>

> >> 2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS:

> >> Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a

> >> gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten

> > tear

> >> gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside

> > them

> >> in the police line, shouting " Please come out and give yourself up. "

> >>

> >> 3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???

> >> An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and

> > forced

> >> him to drive to two different automated teller machines,wherein the

> >> kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

> >>

> >> 4. THE GETAWAY!

> >> A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop, and asked for all the

> > money

> >> in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up

> > the

> >> store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until

> > police

> >> showed up and grabbed him.

> >>

> >> 5. DID I SAY THAT???

> >> Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just

> >> couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each

> > man

> >> in the lineup to repeat the words, " Give me all your money or I'll

> > shoot, "

> >> the man shouted, " That's not what I said! "

> >>

> >> 6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??

> >> A man spoke frantically into the phone, " My wife is pregnant and her

> >> contractions are only two minutes apart! " " Is this her first child? "

> > the

> >> doctor asked. " No! " , the man shouted, " This is her husband! " .

> >>

> >> 7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!! In Modesto, California,

> >> King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of

> > America

> >> branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a

> > gun,

> >> but unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.

> >> (hellllllooooooo!)

> >>

> >> 8. THE GRAND FINALE

> >> Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an

> > hour

> >> east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to boating, were

> > having a

> >> problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand

> > new

> >> 22 ft. boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no

> >> matter how much power was applied. After about an hour of trying to

> > make

> >> it go, they putted to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could

> > tell

> >> them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in

> >> perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive went up

> > and

> >> down, the prop was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina

> > guys

> >> jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water,

> > he

> >> was laughing so hard. NOW REMEMBER ... THIS IS TRUE . Under the boat,

> >> still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.

> >>

> >> Does any one else find it frightening that the majority of these took

> >> place in California?????

> >