Guest guest Posted February 13, 2004 Report Share Posted February 13, 2004 Dear Rhonda, I am so sorry you were going through so much emotional stress b/c of this horrid illness. I can so realte...I've had 3 suicide attempts in the past 10 years. And was VERY angry that the first 2 attempts were intercepted. (I've only been able to actually talk about it out loud for a couple of years) Mainly b/c I didn't feel like I could stand this anymore. I was treated so horrible by docs, & suffered more than a dog would ever be made suffer going to a vet's. The same dark thought are always lurking. Since I ended up in the hospital a couple of weeks ago, these feelings are in my thoughts a lot. I've tried to get hold of my doc since Monday. I finally talked to the nurse this morning & she promised to be sure to tell him to call me. When I do start down this road I focus on God, what Jesus has done for me, what's in store for us in heaven, my family, & especially my son. I also keep reminding myself that in the past, the pain has eventually subsided to tolerable levels. And will again. I just have to hang in there until it does. I'm glad you have such a wonderful boyfriend. Having someone who loves you helps you want to keep fighting. I love the way he stands up for you to your ex. I appreciate the encouragement, but in total honesty, I'm not that strong. I've been sick for so long that the only good thing coming out of having this stupid illness is to help & encourage others. So it's sort of selfish, in a way. Big hugs, Deanna Tubb New Mexico PAI Rep Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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