Guest guest Posted May 22, 2009 Report Share Posted May 22, 2009 Hi group, I haven't checked in or responded in a while. I have been busy trying to help my mom out since my granddad had several strokes the last of April. I flew home to see him with the week and to spend time with him because I thought he was in pretty bad shape. He was sleeping a lot and hard to awake. The day after I got there he started to become more alert. I think it was some meds that were making him sleep like that. So I stayed for a while because I knew it would be hard on my mom since she lost her mom at an early age and was very close to my granddad. Once the meds were decrease he started coming around and staying up longer and remembering things and talking more. One side was paralyzed a bit but not totally thank God. So my question is what do you do with a woman that only want to take his money and dump him in the rest home? This is not my grandmother and will never be because of her actions. She has tried to get power of attorney over him so she claims so she can pay the bills but all the family believes that she wants his money and to dump him in the rest home. I am so upset by this because my granddad is very loving and kind and has been like a father to me and my sisters since we didn't grow up with one. He did all he could for us and to help my mom and we all love him to death. We are very close to him and want to do anything for him to help him get better. He keeps saying he wants to go home but is currently in the hospital were my mom works so that he can get more therapy and regain strength on the affected side. He is 82 years old and has been through a lot in that last few years. His wife doesn't love him and I don't think she ever did. I think she just saw what he had and figured he wouldn't be around long. As I mentioned earlier, his wife tried to get him to sign in front of witness, power of attorney. He said he didn't think that he would sign anything now. She got mad and blew up at my mom when she told granddad not to sign anything or he was going to the rest home. Does anyone know of anything that can be done so that she will not be able to trick him into signing and take all that he had worked so hard for and be dumped in the rest home? I think he should be living this part of his life in peace and not chaos like she is causing. No one said that they wanted anything of my granddad's but her. He has five children includin my mom and most of it has fallen on her because she is the oldest not to mention the only girl. So she and my grandfather are very close. Any advice on what we could do to keep her from doing something like this? I don't want him to go to the rest home if he doesn't have to go and just because his wife wants to take all of his things and money. I am devastated by the actions of his wife and I hate how she is treating my granddad. If need be I would go home and take care of him myself to make sure the stupid wife doesn't get off the hook and he doesn't have to go to the rest home until absolutely necessary. I From: "Neurosarcoidosis " <Neurosarcoidosis >To: Neurosarcoidosis Sent: Friday, May 22, 2009 6:59:44 PMSubject: Digest Number 4873There are 4 messages in this issue.Topics in this digest:1.1. Re: Hello From: Rose 2a. trace from jessica From: jessicabouhamama3. changes From: Rose 4. Quiz of the Week! From: Rose Messages________________________________________________________________________1.1. Re: Hello Posted by: "Rose " mamadogrose@... mamadawgrose Date: Thu May 21, 2009 6:41 pm ((PDT)), I think it was me you are thinking of. I live in . I don't know about the skin thing; do yhou have a dermatologist that's familiar with sarc? I know there are many different skin manifestations. Do you see the sarc docs at IUMC?Ramblin' RoseModerator"How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these." ~ Washington Carver To: Neurosarcoidosis From: jackie3740@...Date: Thu, 21 May 2009 06:39:01 -0700Subject: Re: Re: HelloHello and hmm was it Kim who came here for the Sarc thing in Indianapolis...she asked me to go considering I live here but I was down at the time...and I never heard of using msm powder...or I don't remember since the ole memory isn't like it was lol and my heart and prayers go out to the mods and members who are down right now boy do I know how you feel...this disease really sucks!-- Re: Hello,I am Greg age 45 From Texas Diag with Neurosarcoidosis a Year ago. I can only say that I empathize with you. I am still learning all about this BS disease. I will say this I will add you to my prayers and wish you many pain free days as possible. I know Tracie and Rose and others will answer questions better then I. So may you be blessed.Greg aka Krumdawg>>> Hello everyone...>> I'm .. .age 46 from Indianapolis and I was a member before and I've> been living with sarcoidosis for 11 years now and it attacked my central> nervous system about 9 years ago I left the group because I just wanted to> get away from anything or anyone having to do with this disease and attempt> to try to forget that I had it but wow this disease is so dreadful it won't> not even for a minute allow you to forget...geesh I have been through so> much since attacking my nervous system I have peripheral neuropathy and> couldn't even walk for 2 years but though I'm walking I stagger like crazy!> UGH!>> I have fallen and broke my elbow and my ankle in the past due to the> neuropathy and have fallen many other times but I managed to get up without> too much damage though it hurt.>> I've had plasma freesis or whatever it's called lol and I've had this other> thing done where you go in and they UT the iv in until the fluid is used but> my memory is bad now so I can't remember what it was called which is another> thing...bad memory.>> My eyesight is bad and I get legions around my nose which I go get> injections for that hurts like heck! The doc says that I even have legions> in my brain so go figure.>> I have a new thing that is happening now...>> The skin on my face has developed light spots!?>> What the hey is going on!>> I am so mad at this disease!>> It has and continues to destroy my life and oh yeah I'm on disabilty!>------------ --------- --------- ------~~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~~The Neurosarcoidosis CommunityCHATROOM LINK: http://www.sarcbudd ies.com -- Open all the time.....Message Archives:-http://groups. yahoo.com/ group/Neurosarco idosis/messagesMembers Database:-Listings of locations, phone numbers, and instant messengers.http://groups. yahoo.com/ group/Neurosarco idosis/database Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 22, 2009 Report Share Posted May 22, 2009 That messages about my granddad was from Shauna in Atl.. Sorry I wrote so long but I need some advice and needed to release some tension. Shauna in Atl.!! Thanks for the response. From: "Neurosarcoidosis " <Neurosarcoidosis >To: Neurosarcoidosis Sent: Friday, May 22, 2009 6:59:44 PMSubject: Digest Number 4873There are 4 messages in this issue.Topics in this digest:1.1. Re: Hello From: Rose 2a. trace from jessica From: jessicabouhamama3. changes From: Rose 4. Quiz of the Week! From: Rose Messages________________________________________________________________________1.1. Re: Hello Posted by: "Rose " mamadogrose@... mamadawgrose Date: Thu May 21, 2009 6:41 pm ((PDT)), I think it was me you are thinking of. I live in . I don't know about the skin thing; do yhou have a dermatologist that's familiar with sarc? I know there are many different skin manifestations. Do you see the sarc docs at IUMC?Ramblin' RoseModerator"How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these." ~ Washington Carver To: Neurosarcoidosis From: jackie3740@...Date: Thu, 21 May 2009 06:39:01 -0700Subject: Re: Re: HelloHello and hmm was it Kim who came here for the Sarc thing in Indianapolis...she asked me to go considering I live here but I was down at the time...and I never heard of using msm powder...or I don't remember since the ole memory isn't like it was lol and my heart and prayers go out to the mods and members who are down right now boy do I know how you feel...this disease really sucks!-- Re: Hello,I am Greg age 45 From Texas Diag with Neurosarcoidosis a Year ago. I can only say that I empathize with you. I am still learning all about this BS disease. I will say this I will add you to my prayers and wish you many pain free days as possible. I know Tracie and Rose and others will answer questions better then I. So may you be blessed.Greg aka Krumdawg>>> Hello everyone...>> I'm .. .age 46 from Indianapolis and I was a member before and I've> been living with sarcoidosis for 11 years now and it attacked my central> nervous system about 9 years ago I left the group because I just wanted to> get away from anything or anyone having to do with this disease and attempt> to try to forget that I had it but wow this disease is so dreadful it won't> not even for a minute allow you to forget...geesh I have been through so> much since attacking my nervous system I have peripheral neuropathy and> couldn't even walk for 2 years but though I'm walking I stagger like crazy!> UGH!>> I have fallen and broke my elbow and my ankle in the past due to the> neuropathy and have fallen many other times but I managed to get up without> too much damage though it hurt.>> I've had plasma freesis or whatever it's called lol and I've had this other> thing done where you go in and they UT the iv in until the fluid is used but> my memory is bad now so I can't remember what it was called which is another> thing...bad memory.>> My eyesight is bad and I get legions around my nose which I go get> injections for that hurts like heck! The doc says that I even have legions> in my brain so go figure.>> I have a new thing that is happening now...>> The skin on my face has developed light spots!?>> What the hey is going on!>> I am so mad at this disease!>> It has and continues to destroy my life and oh yeah I'm on disabilty!>------------ --------- --------- ------~~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~~The Neurosarcoidosis CommunityCHATROOM LINK: http://www.sarcbudd ies.com -- Open all the time.....Message Archives:-http://groups. yahoo.com/ group/Neurosarco idosis/messagesMembers Database:-Listings of locations, phone numbers, and instant messengers.http://groups. yahoo.com/ group/Neurosarco idosis/database Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 22, 2009 Report Share Posted May 22, 2009 Shauna, Your Grandfather needs to sit down with an attorney and set up a Living Trust. He can make your mom or one of the grandkids Trustee. He needs to put down what he wants should he end up with another stroke that leaves him incapable of making his own decision re: his health care. DNR--Do Not Resuscitate or Medical Directives only take care of the medical wishes. They are not a will, and if your step mom can prove him incapable of making decisions, then she could get this going her direction. He really does need an attorney to help with this-- and that way if they are in a community property state (spouse automatically gets all) then there is specific language this document needs to have. I know he probably does not want to deal with this-- most of us don't want to deal with this subject -- but it is so very important. It sounds like he has been with this woman for some time? Is the home in "joint tenancy"? Are his 401's or IRA's in both names? What about stocks and bonds? Savings accounts? How do they have things set up. Your mom needs to sit down with him, go with him to the attorney's-- and the step mom has the right to go also. However, it is your Grandfa's call on what to do with his assets to some extent-- and it needs to be addressed. If your stepmom is overwhelmed taking care of him, then look into getting some care-giver support where there is someone who can come in and make sure he's being taken care of, and not being abused or taken advantage of. Once this issue is on paper, then it will close the fight down-- so get them working on this very soon. Take care, Tracie NS Co-owner/moderator From: Ministry <jackie3740 (AT) indy (DOT) rr.com>Subject: Re: Re: HelloTo: Neurosarcoidosis@ yahoogroups. comDate: Tuesday, May 19, 2009, 11:45 PMHello Greg and thanks!How long have you had this dreaded sarcoidosis?-- Re: Hello,I am Greg age 45 From Texas Diag with Neurosarcoidosis a Year ago. I can only say that I empathize with you. I am still learning all about this BS disease. I will say this I will add you to my prayers and wish you many pain free days as possible. I know Tracie and Rose and others will answer questions better then I. So may you be blessed.Greg aka Krumdawg>>> Hello everyone...>> I'm .. .age 46 from Indianapolis and I was a member before and I've> been living with sarcoidosis for 11 years now and it attacked my central> nervous system about 9 years ago I left the group because I just wanted to> get away from anything or anyone having to do with this disease and attempt> to try to forget that I had it but wow this disease is so dreadful it won't> not even for a minute allow you to forget...geesh I have been through so> much since attacking my nervous system I have peripheral neuropathy and> couldn't even walk for 2 years but though I'm walking I stagger like crazy!> UGH!>> I have fallen and broke my elbow and my ankle in the past due to the> neuropathy and have fallen many other times but I managed to get up without> too much damage though it hurt.>> I've had plasma freesis or whatever it's called lol and I've had this other> thing done where you go in and they UT the iv in until the fluid is used but> my memory is bad now so I can't remember what it was called which is another> thing...bad memory.>> My eyesight is bad and I get legions around my nose which I go get> injections for that hurts like heck! The doc says that I even have legions> in my brain so go figure.>> I have a new thing that is happening now...>> The skin on my face has developed light spots!?>> What the hey is going on!>> I am so mad at this disease!>> It has and continues to destroy my life and oh yeah I'm on disabilty!>------------ --------- --------- ------~~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~~The Neurosarcoidosis CommunityCHATROOM LINK: http://www.sarcbudd ies.com -- Open all the time.....Message Archives:-http://groups. yahoo.com/ group/Neurosarco idosis/messagesMembers Database:-Listings of locations, phone numbers, and instant messengers.http://groups. yahoo.com/ group/Neurosarco idosis/database Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 22, 2009 Report Share Posted May 22, 2009 Tracie, You impress me again and again. I was in the middle of writting about same thang when your posting hit my mail box. Shauna, Tracie has given you sage advice. I have just updated my " Living Will " just a few days ago. Please get with your mother and grandfarther and discussed it. Wishing all with Pain free loving days. Greg > > > > Subject: Re: Digest Number 4873 > To: Neurosarcoidosis > Date: Friday, May 22, 2009, 9:36 PM > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hi group, >  > I haven't checked in or responded in a while. I have been busy trying to help my mom out since my granddad had several strokes the last of April. I flew home to see him with the week and to spend time with him because I thought he was in pretty bad shape. He was sleeping a lot and hard to awake. The day after I got there he started to become more alert. I think it was some meds that were making him sleep like that. So I stayed for a while because I knew it would be hard on my mom since she lost her mom at an early age and was very close to my granddad. Once the meds were decrease he started coming around and staying up longer and remembering things and talking more. One side was paralyzed a bit but not totally thank God. >  > So my question is what do you do with a woman that only want to take his money and dump him in the rest home? This is not my grandmother and will never be because of her actions.  She has tried to get power of attorney over him so she claims so she can pay the bills but all the family believes that she wants his money and to dump him in the rest home. >  > I am so upset by this because my granddad is very loving and kind and has been like a father to me and my sisters since we didn't grow up with one. He did all he could for us and to help my mom and we all love him to death. We are very close to him and want to do anything for him to help him get better. He keeps saying he wants to go home but is currently in the hospital were my mom works so that he can get more therapy and regain strength on the affected side.  He is 82 years old and has been through a lot in that last few years. His wife doesn't love him and I don't think she ever did. I think she just saw what he had and figured he wouldn't be around long. >  > As I mentioned earlier, his wife tried to get him to sign in front of witness, power of attorney. He said he didn't think that he would sign anything now. She got mad and blew up at my mom when she told granddad not to sign anything or he was going to the rest home. >  > Does anyone know of anything that can be done so that she will not be able to trick him into signing and take all that he had worked so hard for and be dumped in the rest home? I think he should be living this part of his life in peace and not chaos like she is causing. No one said that they wanted anything of my granddad's but her. He has five children includin my mom and most of it has fallen on her because she is the oldest not to mention the only girl. So she and my grandfather are very close. >  > Any advice on what we could do to keep her from doing something like this? I don't want him to go to the rest home if he doesn't have to go and just because his wife wants to take all of his things and money. >  > I am devastated by the actions of his wife and I hate how she is treating my granddad. If need be I would go home and take care of him myself to make sure the stupid wife doesn't get off the hook and he doesn't have to go to the rest home until absolutely necessary. >  > I > > > > From: " Neurosarcoidosis@ yahoogroups. com " <Neurosarcoidosis@ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 23, 2009 Report Share Posted May 23, 2009  I totally agree My sister had to do the same thing with her late husband. Well almost. The children wanted to have him retire to a home. She is their stepmother but the love of his life. His children left and didn't return until he had been told he had cancer. Then some 25 years later they decided they were going to take him back as dad. It was very disappointing for my sister and her husband. They came in and tried to take over. Jim and my sister went to a lawyer some 6 months before he passed. The children tried to protest to no avail. I have a living will myself so does my spouse. It tells everyone what I want done incase of my passing. It really isn't that hard and well worth the effort for the piece of mind for you, your siblings, and your mother. Go for it and good luck. Jackie from Wisconsin Re: Hello,I am Greg age 45 From Texas Diag with Neurosarcoidosis a Year ago. I can only say that I empathize with you. I am still learning all about this BS disease. I will say this I will add you to my prayers and wish you many pain free days as possible. I know Tracie and Rose and others will answer questions better then I. So may you be blessed.Greg aka Krumdawg>>> Hello everyone...>> I'm .. .age 46 from Indianapolis and I was a member before and I've> been living with sarcoidosis for 11 years now and it attacked my central> nervous system about 9 years ago I left the group because I just wanted to> get away from anything or anyone having to do with this disease and attempt> to try to forget that I had it but wow this disease is so dreadful it won't> not even for a minute allow you to forget...geesh I have been through so> much since attacking my nervous system I have peripheral neuropathy and> couldn't even walk for 2 years but though I'm walking I stagger like crazy!> UGH!>> I have fallen and broke my elbow and my ankle in the past due to the> neuropathy and have fallen many other times but I managed to get up without> too much damage though it hurt.>> I've had plasma freesis or whatever it's called lol and I've had this other> thing done where you go in and they UT the iv in until the fluid is used but> my memory is bad now so I can't remember what it was called which is another> thing...bad memory.>> My eyesight is bad and I get legions around my nose which I go get> injections for that hurts like heck! The doc says that I even have legions> in my brain so go figure.>> I have a new thing that is happening now...>> The skin on my face has developed light spots!?>> What the hey is going on!>> I am so mad at this disease!>> It has and continues to destroy my life and oh yeah I'm on disabilty!>------------ --------- --------- ------~~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~~The Neurosarcoidosis CommunityCHATROOM LINK: http://www.sarcbudd ies.com -- Open all the time.....Message Archives:-http://groups. yahoo.com/ group/Neurosarco idosis/messagesMembers Database:-Listings of locations, phone numbers, and instant messengers.http://groups. yahoo.com/ group/Neurosarco idosis/database Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.