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I'm new here...testing...could someone let me know if your able to read

this.....

Thanks,

Sonja

282/170-now.

Lap RNY-12/19/2001

Funny things...

Over the past week I've really noticed a couple of things that have

struck me as funny. The reason is probably because being 418 lbs I

had forgotten how things really are. Things like; sitting in a

restaurant booth without having to move the table or hoping that the

table wasn't attached to the wall. Now I have at least two or three

inches between the table edge and my body, this hasn't happened for

maybe 12 years or more. Another thing is that I can now look straight

down and see my feet, not just my toes, but most of my feet (and some

unmentionables I haven't been able to see in quite a while). Then

today, I put on a pair of jeans that I probably couldn't have fit

into over 20 years ago.

So when those of you that are considering the WLS. I want you to

think about where you are now, happiness wise. I believe, men (and

women) are on this earth to enjoy their lives. For those of us, for

one reason or another, aren't really living, we're just in survival

mode, I'm convinced that WLS is a tool by which we can break the

chains of depression, paranoia, and self-doubt. I am only 90+ days

post-op, but I am convinced that if I had not stuck with my decision

to follow through with the surgery, I would be in the same place

mentally and physically that I was just three months ago. I now have

a new start on life and being 47 years old, I am more than ready to

live my life as it was intended, with Joy. That joy includes my wife,

my children, and perhaps more importantly myself.

Thanks for this group's support. This type of medium to convey and

converse is a great way to touch lives and show others that there are

many other souls in the very same or similar position in life. Thanks

again.

-Ray

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I WAS ABLE TO READ IT.

TINA

> Re: Funny things...

>

> I'm new here...testing...could someone let me know if your able to read

this.....

> Thanks,

>

> Sonja

> 282/170-now.

> Lap RNY-12/19/2001

> Funny things...

>

>

>

> Over the past week I've really noticed a couple of things that have

> struck me as funny. The reason is probably because being 418 lbs I

> had forgotten how things really are. Things like; sitting in a

> restaurant booth without having to move the table or hoping that the

> table wasn't attached to the wall. Now I have at least two or three

> inches between the table edge and my body, this hasn't happened for

> maybe 12 years or more. Another thing is that I can now look straight

> down and see my feet, not just my toes, but most of my feet (and some

> unmentionables I haven't been able to see in quite a while). Then

> today, I put on a pair of jeans that I probably couldn't have fit

> into over 20 years ago.

>

> So when those of you that are considering the WLS. I want you to

> think about where you are now, happiness wise. I believe, men (and

> women) are on this earth to enjoy their lives. For those of us, for

> one reason or another, aren't really living, we're just in survival

> mode, I'm convinced that WLS is a tool by which we can break the

> chains of depression, paranoia, and self-doubt. I am only 90+ days

> post-op, but I am convinced that if I had not stuck with my decision

> to follow through with the surgery, I would be in the same place

> mentally and physically that I was just three months ago. I now have

> a new start on life and being 47 years old, I am more than ready to

> live my life as it was intended, with Joy. That joy includes my wife,

> my children, and perhaps more importantly myself.

>

> Thanks for this group's support. This type of medium to convey and

> converse is a great way to touch lives and show others that there are

> many other souls in the very same or similar position in life. Thanks

> again.

>

> -Ray

>

>

>

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Thank you Ray. You spoke directly to my heart on that one. I agree. The only

way I am going to be able to enjoy the time God has given me is to have this

surgery. I know that God does not want us sitting cooped up in a house unable

to enjoy the wonders he has provided for us in the world. Keep up the good

work, you are an inspiration to us all.

Dora

Still waiting on insurance approval.

Funny things...

Over the past week I've really noticed a couple of things that have

struck me as funny. The reason is probably because being 418 lbs I

had forgotten how things really are. Things like; sitting in a

restaurant booth without having to move the table or hoping that the

table wasn't attached to the wall. Now I have at least two or three

inches between the table edge and my body, this hasn't happened for

maybe 12 years or more. Another thing is that I can now look straight

down and see my feet, not just my toes, but most of my feet (and some

unmentionables I haven't been able to see in quite a while). Then

today, I put on a pair of jeans that I probably couldn't have fit

into over 20 years ago.

So when those of you that are considering the WLS. I want you to

think about where you are now, happiness wise. I believe, men (and

women) are on this earth to enjoy their lives. For those of us, for

one reason or another, aren't really living, we're just in survival

mode, I'm convinced that WLS is a tool by which we can break the

chains of depression, paranoia, and self-doubt. I am only 90+ days

post-op, but I am convinced that if I had not stuck with my decision

to follow through with the surgery, I would be in the same place

mentally and physically that I was just three months ago. I now have

a new start on life and being 47 years old, I am more than ready to

live my life as it was intended, with Joy. That joy includes my wife,

my children, and perhaps more importantly myself.

Thanks for this group's support. This type of medium to convey and

converse is a great way to touch lives and show others that there are

many other souls in the very same or similar position in life. Thanks

again.

-Ray

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Great !!

I have been wanting to join this groupoi for sometime now, however I wasn't

quite sure how to sign up. So it's great I'm finally here.

I'm not sure where to begin. I would like to think that there are other men,

women out there that has had bypass and has lost a large amount of weight have

gone thru a simular situation that I have had and still have.....do I make any

sense at all ?????? I guess is what I'm trying to say is that since my weight

loss I have had many, many men approach me and that was something that I was not

use to. I have had a number of affairs. I'm married with 2 boys. I want to stop,

but being wanted by other men (good looking) feels so incredibly wonderful. I

dont mean to be so blunt about this, I just know that there are people out there

that know what I'm feeling and can help me thru this.

Funny things...

>

>

>

> Over the past week I've really noticed a couple of things that have

> struck me as funny. The reason is probably because being 418 lbs I

> had forgotten how things really are. Things like; sitting in a

> restaurant booth without having to move the table or hoping that the

> table wasn't attached to the wall. Now I have at least two or three

> inches between the table edge and my body, this hasn't happened for

> maybe 12 years or more. Another thing is that I can now look straight

> down and see my feet, not just my toes, but most of my feet (and some

> unmentionables I haven't been able to see in quite a while). Then

> today, I put on a pair of jeans that I probably couldn't have fit

> into over 20 years ago.

>

> So when those of you that are considering the WLS. I want you to

> think about where you are now, happiness wise. I believe, men (and

> women) are on this earth to enjoy their lives. For those of us, for

> one reason or another, aren't really living, we're just in survival

> mode, I'm convinced that WLS is a tool by which we can break the

> chains of depression, paranoia, and self-doubt. I am only 90+ days

> post-op, but I am convinced that if I had not stuck with my decision

> to follow through with the surgery, I would be in the same place

> mentally and physically that I was just three months ago. I now have

> a new start on life and being 47 years old, I am more than ready to

> live my life as it was intended, with Joy. That joy includes my wife,

> my children, and perhaps more importantly myself.

>

> Thanks for this group's support. This type of medium to convey and

> converse is a great way to touch lives and show others that there are

> many other souls in the very same or similar position in life. Thanks

> again.

>

> -Ray

>

>

>

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Sonja,

I don't mean to be blunt, but you just have to stop. You married your husband

and entered into vows with him that you are to hold sacred. You did not say I

will love you until someone else comes along and wants me. Not to mention that

what you are doing could do lasting harm to your children. If your children

find out what you are doing that teaches them a lesson that no parent would ever

want their children to learn. You are teaching them that you keep your word as

long as it is easy. But as soon as there is temptation and things get a little

hard to resist you just give in and go for it without thing caring that it will

hurt everyone in your life. Be proud that you look good. Enjoy the complements

and grow into your new self-esteem that you deserve, but don't think that

because you are now thin and attractive to these men that it gives you the right

to break the sanctity of your marriage. If you are a Christian pray about it.

God will give you the strength to get through this and will give you and your

husband the tools you will need to repair your marriage. If you are not a

Christian and want to know what God has for you email me privately and I will

share with you. But bottom line, you must stop and you must stop now. You are

doing damage that you alone are not going to be able to fix. Being thin and

attractive does not give you the right to be ugly and hateful to those who have

stood beside you through the thick and the thin (literally).

Dora

Re: Funny things...

Great !!

I have been wanting to join this groupoi for sometime now, however I wasn't

quite sure how to sign up. So it's great I'm finally here.

I'm not sure where to begin. I would like to think that there are other men,

women out there that has had bypass and has lost a large amount of weight have

gone thru a simular situation that I have had and still have.....do I make any

sense at all ?????? I guess is what I'm trying to say is that since my weight

loss I have had many, many men approach me and that was something that I was not

use to. I have had a number of affairs. I'm married with 2 boys. I want to stop,

but being wanted by other men (good looking) feels so incredibly wonderful. I

dont mean to be so blunt about this, I just know that there are people out there

that know what I'm feeling and can help me thru this.

Funny things...

>

>

>

> Over the past week I've really noticed a couple of things that have

> struck me as funny. The reason is probably because being 418 lbs I

> had forgotten how things really are. Things like; sitting in a

> restaurant booth without having to move the table or hoping that the

> table wasn't attached to the wall. Now I have at least two or three

> inches between the table edge and my body, this hasn't happened for

> maybe 12 years or more. Another thing is that I can now look straight

> down and see my feet, not just my toes, but most of my feet (and some

> unmentionables I haven't been able to see in quite a while). Then

> today, I put on a pair of jeans that I probably couldn't have fit

> into over 20 years ago.

>

> So when those of you that are considering the WLS. I want you to

> think about where you are now, happiness wise. I believe, men (and

> women) are on this earth to enjoy their lives. For those of us, for

> one reason or another, aren't really living, we're just in survival

> mode, I'm convinced that WLS is a tool by which we can break the

> chains of depression, paranoia, and self-doubt. I am only 90+ days

> post-op, but I am convinced that if I had not stuck with my decision

> to follow through with the surgery, I would be in the same place

> mentally and physically that I was just three months ago. I now have

> a new start on life and being 47 years old, I am more than ready to

> live my life as it was intended, with Joy. That joy includes my wife,

> my children, and perhaps more importantly myself.

>

> Thanks for this group's support. This type of medium to convey and

> converse is a great way to touch lives and show others that there are

> many other souls in the very same or similar position in life. Thanks

> again.

>

> -Ray

>

>

>

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Thank you Dora.....all that you said makes perfect sense. Believe me I know my

husband has stuck with me through thick and thin...I think about this all the

time. I never want to hurt him or my kids. I think I got very selfish in the

begining and didn't think about anybody else but me....over the past few months

my ugly behavior has toned down quite a bit. I almost think that I got it out of

my system.

I'm very grateful for this web site. It feels sooooooo good to be able to talk

with people who have been through WLS or how are planning to have it. :)

Funny things...

>

>

>

> Over the past week I've really noticed a couple of things that have

> struck me as funny. The reason is probably because being 418 lbs I

> had forgotten how things really are. Things like; sitting in a

> restaurant booth without having to move the table or hoping that the

> table wasn't attached to the wall. Now I have at least two or three

> inches between the table edge and my body, this hasn't happened for

> maybe 12 years or more. Another thing is that I can now look straight

> down and see my feet, not just my toes, but most of my feet (and some

> unmentionables I haven't been able to see in quite a while). Then

> today, I put on a pair of jeans that I probably couldn't have fit

> into over 20 years ago.

>

> So when those of you that are considering the WLS. I want you to

> think about where you are now, happiness wise. I believe, men (and

> women) are on this earth to enjoy their lives. For those of us, for

> one reason or another, aren't really living, we're just in survival

> mode, I'm convinced that WLS is a tool by which we can break the

> chains of depression, paranoia, and self-doubt. I am only 90+ days

> post-op, but I am convinced that if I had not stuck with my decision

> to follow through with the surgery, I would be in the same place

> mentally and physically that I was just three months ago. I now have

> a new start on life and being 47 years old, I am more than ready to

> live my life as it was intended, with Joy. That joy includes my wife,

> my children, and perhaps more importantly myself.

>

> Thanks for this group's support. This type of medium to convey and

> converse is a great way to touch lives and show others that there are

> many other souls in the very same or similar position in life. Thanks

> again.

>

> -Ray

>

>

>

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Guest guest

VERY WELL said!!! Thank you for putting that so nicely.... = )

When this topic came up (again), I cringed because of some of the harsh

responses. I don't condone affairs but if someone comes to you for help or

advice I don't think we should be harsh in delivering our answer otherwise,

it could hurt someone or at the very least, make them tune us out.

I am very happy to see your compassionate, yet *to-the-point* answer.

Thank you,

ICE (who is not flaming anyone - just making an observation)

-- Re: Funny things...

This is one side affect that the doctors don't warn you about, and I

can see how it is all too common. Like the proverbial kid in a candy

store, positive attention is a first to some, and can be just as

addicting as any candy or drug. A lot of us have never had the wolf

whistles from cars or the bad pick up lines when we were younger, and

don't quite know what to do with them now. It is thrilling to have

someone acknowledge us. Even now, after only 4 months, I get treated

differently, but only by people who weren't interested in me as a

person a hundred pounds ago.

To get by in the world when we were bigger, a question we had to ask

ourselves was what is more important, WHO we are, or HOW we appear to

others. The question is no different now than it was a hundred

pounds ago. A better question might be how good is your self

esteem? The lower the self esteem, the more easily swayed by the

thoughts and attitudes of others.

You realize now what is happening, and it is up to you to do

something about it. If you need to revamp your marriage, there are

many ways. It can become almost, if not more, exciting as any

affair. Plus added the benefits of strengthing your marriage and the

lack of guilt that affairs can bring. It is all up to you.

Good luck.

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