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Thanks Fay,

I can't change the fact that those complications occured, but I felt

a strong urge to " intervene " and confront her about the choices she

has made since then, but knew deep down that this wasn't the time or

place for an intervention. The real shame is that she is setting

herself up for more trouble, and RNY surgery (and Dr. Harrington in

particular) will no doubt be blamed for this also.

Thanks Again,

Monte in VA

LAP RNY 1/30/02

Dr. Harrington/Commonwealth Surgeons

01/30/02 Wt. - 660

05/09/02 Wt. - 298 (-362)

> In a message dated 6/15/2003 10:22:12 PM Eastern Standard Time,

> rhapsdyblu@h... writes:

>

> > Well, thanks to all who read this... I guess I just needed to

vent.

> > >The more I think about our conversation, the more frustrated

I've

> > >become, and I'm at a loss for whether or not I should have

handled

> > >it differently.

> >

>

> It has been my experience, that people like this are talkers and

never

> listeners. She would not have heard you. Congrats on not wasting

your time. By

> the way, I was in therapy for many years, it was the questions the

doc asked

> (like you were asking) that did more than any lecture could have

done.

>

>

>

> Fay Bayuk

> **300/168

> 10/23/01

> Dr.

> Open RNY 150 cm

> Click for My Profile

> <A HREF= " http://obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/profile.phtml?

N=Bayuk951061008 " >http://obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/profile.phtml?

N=Bayuk951061008</A>

>

>

>

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Thanks Lorraine,

I guess the most frustrating aspect of the situation is that I felt,

for the first time ever, a brief moment of hesitation about whether

or not I would recommend " my " surgeon and " my " surgery group to

those who could benefit. That moment has passed.

Thanks Again,

Monte in VA

LAP RNY 1/30/02

Dr. Harrington/Commonwealth Surgeons

01/30/02 Wt. - 660

06/09/02 Wt. - 298 (-362)

> I posted a response earlier, but i realized I might have just sent

it

> to Monte. I'll try again,

>

> Monte,

>

> Please don't beat yourself up for how you feel. First of all your

> experience with Dr. Harrington is yours and that woman's mother's

was

> hers. Even if he did butcher her, he did not butcher you. No

matter

> her experience it doesn't take away that you had a good one.

>

> Also, we are all so different psychologically, physically,

> intellectually. I have been working in the field of human

behavior

> for over 20 years and even I can't fully understand why people

self

> destruct. I have met so many people who jumped into this surgery

> without really researching and even more who will not follow post

op

> protocol. Even when they are ill and malnourished, they say, " I

> don't want to do all that " , or it's too much trouble, or " I did

this

> (wls) so I wouldn't have to think about my weight any more " .

>

> You did what was best. You have to pick and chose your battles &

> this one didn't seem like it was worth your energy. Save that

energy

> for a battle worth your efforts.

>

> BTW, your weight loss has been phenomenal. Congratulations.

>

> Lorraine

>

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