Re: Just a thought related to MLK Day and a movie we saw- on topic,though

[Guest guest]

I think a lot of all this bad stigma about clubfoot is because of

the name itself- clubfoot. The name inspires negativity, because you

immediately associate it with a deformity. It's more of a

descriptive word rather than a medical term, KWIM? I believe that

the simple term talipes would allow people to see it more from a

medical perspective rather than a degrading status. That's just my

two cents. I think I may have mentioned this thought on here before -

when I found out that my son was going to have " clubfoot " , my mind

immediately went to a movie that I saw when I was younger (much

younger). It was an old black and white movie (I don't even remember

the name). It was about a guy who had clubfoot and he was seen as

some sort of a mean freak (though he wasn't). But in all the scenes,

whenever he would walk into a room, the shot would be on his foot

with the big shoe and they would play that spooky music. Anyway,

that's the visual I had because the name clubfoot really stuck. Of

course it's nothing like that, but if I saw it in such a negative

way, I'm sure others may see it that way too.

>

> Hi all,

>

> Today is Luther King Day in the US and it got me thinking,

> how far have we really come towards the equality of all people?

> After the movie I saw last night, I really wonder how far we have

> come when it comes to disabilities. The movie is Return to Me. It

is

> a wonderful romantic comedy made in 2000 with Duchovny and

> Minnie Driver as the leads. My husband and I have seen this movie

> dozens of times. It is one of his all time favorites. I guess we

> must not have seen it since my daughter was born 14 months ago

with

> bilateral clubfeet because there is this scene which I will

briefly

> describe to you, which was really rather upsetting....

>

> Minnie Driver plays a woman who had a heart transplant. She is

> dating a man played by Duchovny and is afraid to tell him

> about the transplant for fear he will consider her damaged and

leave

> her. They have been dating for some time when she decides it is

the

> night to tell him. Her grandfather and his buddies are playing

poker

> in the other room and they are discussing the fact that she is

going

> to tell him about the transplant. One says " I don't know what the

> big deal is...I dated a girl with a clubfoot once and she had the

> big shoe and everything. " Another says " Oh, you're a Saint " , still

> another says " Oh, you'll be remembered in heaven for that one " .

> Needless to say, it just wasn't funny to us now. There is sarcasm

in

> it and they are picking on the guy for his stupid comment, but to

us

> it just made us think of our precious daughter and how some boy or

> man may some day think that about her. Thanks to Dr. P. no one

will

> ever know unless she chooses to tell them, but it was still

> upsetting.

>

> Now this was just a movie, but some writer somewhere thought that

> picking on clubfeet would be funny to people, and I am ashamed to

> say that we used to think this was a very funny scene. Not the

part

> about the girl having a clubfoot, but the sarcasm about him being

> remembered in Heaven for it. I consider myself to be pretty

> enlightened when it comes to disabilities since I have volunteered

> with the New York State Parks Games for the Physically Challenged,

> worked for two years at an Easter Seals camp, and volunteered as a

> respite care provider for a little boy with Cerebral Palsy, but I

> guess I never really understood until my daughter was born. I

guess

> there is still a large part of the population that thinks it is

> funny to pick on disabilities.

>

> I was really upset because I tend to forget that my daughter was

> born with a disability, until something like this reminds me that

> others might see her as different. We all know that clubfoot is a

> disability. Thanks to Dr. Ponseti and all of the wonderful doctors

> who are choosing to use his method, it is not a handicapping

> condition for our children. But the fact remains that they were

born

> disabled, and without treatment they would bear the labels that

are

> so negative still... " crippled " , " handicapped " , " disabled " . Knowing

> this just strengthens my desire to get the word out about Dr. P

and

> his work, to do everything in my power to prevent children with

> clubfeet from being disabled.

>

> I urge you on this Luther King Day to think about what you

> can do to improve the equality of all people, not just of all

races,

> but of all abilties too! I know I will be taking the time to thank

> 's doctor for going to the trouble to research and travel to

> Iowa to learn from Dr. Ponseti, thus saving my child from a future

> of pain and potential disability. Thanks to my daughter, I now

know

> better than ever before that people born with disabilities are

just

> like those who were not. My daughter is just like her brothers.

They

> are all different, yet they all bear the same family resemblance

in

> physicality and behavior. They all have value. They are equal.

>

> Donna

> mother to (13), (6), Jakob (4), and (14

> months, bilateral clubfeet, FAB 12/7)

>

[Guest guest]

Wow - what a great post and words to grow on I think! People worldwide could

learn about acceptance. I had a husband once (once - he be long gone now...)

who told me to change the channel while we were eating in front of the t.v. one

night because the Special Olympics were on and it made him sick. I was

SHOCKED! He had absolutely no compassion and I'm glad I dumped his ASS!

That being said, my current dh has a hard time using the term " clubfoot " in

front of anyone but professionals (doctors, nurses, etc.). To any of his

friends he'll say " his feet are turned in " , that is unless I get to them first

and say " he's CLUBFOOT " very loudly so my dh can hear! I haven't asked him why

he can't say it, but I suspect it is because it implies disability and he

doesn't want to acknowledge it for what it is: a birth defect, albeit a

correctable one.

Thanks for your post - I found it inspiring!

donnabrooke1 wrote: Hi all,

Today is Luther King Day in the US and it got me thinking,

how far have we really come towards the equality of all people?

After the movie I saw last night, I really wonder how far we have

come when it comes to disabilities. The movie is Return to Me. It is

a wonderful romantic comedy made in 2000 with Duchovny and

Minnie Driver as the leads. My husband and I have seen this movie

dozens of times. It is one of his all time favorites. I guess we

must not have seen it since my daughter was born 14 months ago with

bilateral clubfeet because there is this scene which I will briefly

describe to you, which was really rather upsetting....

Minnie Driver plays a woman who had a heart transplant. She is

dating a man played by Duchovny and is afraid to tell him

about the transplant for fear he will consider her damaged and leave

her. They have been dating for some time when she decides it is the

night to tell him. Her grandfather and his buddies are playing poker

in the other room and they are discussing the fact that she is going

to tell him about the transplant. One says " I don't know what the

big deal is...I dated a girl with a clubfoot once and she had the

big shoe and everything. " Another says " Oh, you're a Saint " , still

another says " Oh, you'll be remembered in heaven for that one " .

Needless to say, it just wasn't funny to us now. There is sarcasm in

it and they are picking on the guy for his stupid comment, but to us

it just made us think of our precious daughter and how some boy or

man may some day think that about her. Thanks to Dr. P. no one will

ever know unless she chooses to tell them, but it was still

upsetting.

Now this was just a movie, but some writer somewhere thought that

picking on clubfeet would be funny to people, and I am ashamed to

say that we used to think this was a very funny scene. Not the part

about the girl having a clubfoot, but the sarcasm about him being

remembered in Heaven for it. I consider myself to be pretty

enlightened when it comes to disabilities since I have volunteered

with the New York State Parks Games for the Physically Challenged,

worked for two years at an Easter Seals camp, and volunteered as a

respite care provider for a little boy with Cerebral Palsy, but I

guess I never really understood until my daughter was born. I guess

there is still a large part of the population that thinks it is

funny to pick on disabilities.

I was really upset because I tend to forget that my daughter was

born with a disability, until something like this reminds me that

others might see her as different. We all know that clubfoot is a

disability. Thanks to Dr. Ponseti and all of the wonderful doctors

who are choosing to use his method, it is not a handicapping

condition for our children. But the fact remains that they were born

disabled, and without treatment they would bear the labels that are

so negative still... " crippled " , " handicapped " , " disabled " . Knowing

this just strengthens my desire to get the word out about Dr. P and

his work, to do everything in my power to prevent children with

clubfeet from being disabled.

I urge you on this Luther King Day to think about what you

can do to improve the equality of all people, not just of all races,

but of all abilties too! I know I will be taking the time to thank

's doctor for going to the trouble to research and travel to

Iowa to learn from Dr. Ponseti, thus saving my child from a future

of pain and potential disability. Thanks to my daughter, I now know

better than ever before that people born with disabilities are just

like those who were not. My daughter is just like her brothers. They

are all different, yet they all bear the same family resemblance in

physicality and behavior. They all have value. They are equal.

Donna

mother to (13), (6), Jakob (4), and (14

months, bilateral clubfeet, FAB 12/7)