Yard art

[Guest guest]

I thought we could all use a laugh-- so I'm telling a true story-- on myself.

A couple of years back, my son feel in love, brought the young worman home and they needed to stay here for a few days until she could find work for the summer and they could find a place to share.

Well, she ends up with 2 cars in my front yard. Torey, our son, had 2 trucks in various stages of being rebuilt, lifts added, 37" tires, beds modified, chasis cut and rebuilt, -- all the stuff a kid has when he has no overhead and lives at home-- making great money building custom homes.

Next, we get the 13ft sailboat out of our backyard, and turn it upside down and start fixing it-- there were a few problems. Tor had an aluminum fishing boat, also out in the driveway, and my husband and I each had our vehicles.

Now, we live in a property owners assoc-- which I think is abbreviated po ass. It's the "tude" of those that worked for the big bucks in LA and then came up here to retire. There are 3500 lots in this area, and only 280 people (the same 280) that ever take advantage of the "get togethers" at the po ass center. They also are the only ones that have the time to go to the po ass board meetings and make the po ass rules. The newest is that you can't have canvas awnings in your yard to protect your cars for more than 30 days. After that, you have to request permits from the po ass mafia to build a permanent building-- which isn't going to happen because we don't have enough fire protection to handle more building structures-- according to the po ass manager.

Anyway, I digress.

Back to the front yard full of vehicles, boats, oh, a canoe, and now, the septic tank and leach lines in the back yard-- fail. So, I have effluent in my yard, they have to dig up parts of the front yard to see where they can put new leach lines, along with all the back yard. I think this place had a wonderfully landscaped back yard- but it was a rental before we bought it. The old couple that lived here-- needed thier Depends. They flushed them down a septic tank, and filled the leach lines wth adult diapers. We discovered we have a backyard full of leach lines. The property map showed only 4-- so we figured we were safe. No-- there were already 10 lines out back-- and now we have 12.

So-- being the country Californian I am, I called a girlfriend and asked her is she still had the metal horse trough up at her property. When she said yes-- I begged her to bring it down-- you see, the other thing about my home, we still have the Christmas lights up-- for the 3rd yr in a row.

so-- 6 cars, 3 boats, a dug up front and back yard-- effluent (poop) floating out back, and I want the horse trough. I figured if we put it out front with all the rest of the stuff, not only would we solve the bathtub issue-- we could get the neighbors over with big straws (or just fart while in the tub) and call it a jacuzzi!

So-- how do you like me now!!

LOL!

Tracie-- who will not admit to any of this again- maybe.