Re: off topic - my son's behavior, again....long!

August 31, 2001

Post a babysitting/special ed teacher sign at the local college. So sorry to

hear your troubles. My son is not in school yet but I am so nervous about it.

Just be an advocate for your child and don't try to win any popularity contests

with the staff. Sounds like you know that though.

Sorry,

Juli

off topic - my son's behavior, again....long!

Well, my son is having a very difficult time at school. He's in a spec. ed

Kindergarten class. Things were getting better last week, and than it took a

turn for the worst. He did quite well on Thursday and Friday of last week, and

again on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday this week. However, yesterday and today

he was out of control. They put him in the office

for 1-1/2 hours today, and made him eat his lunch there too. They returned him

to the class at noon, and he behaved miserably. I was called at 1:15 to pick

him up from school. Apparently, he has no attention span at school, and can't

stay on task. He trys to get up from his seat, and wander around, doing as he

pleases. If the teacher returns him to his work or tells him no, he screams at

her and talks back saying things like, " I don't have to " , " you can't make me " ,

" no, I won't " , etc...... I'm sure you all get the picture. Well, I called an

emergency IEP meeting, and asked them to set it for sometime next week. I told

them that I understand their concern, and I want to get this nipped, but I'm

also starting a new job on Wednesday (big bucks, and we need it), so I can't run

to school and pick him up everytime they can't deal with him. I was very nice

about the whole thing, but I told them that they were still obligated to provide

him an education, in the least restrictive environment, and if he's too much to

handle for 1 teacher and 2 aides in a class of 12, than the school needs to

higher a 1 on 1 aide for him. The Principal brought up medicating him, and I

agreed with wanting to try it, but I'm having difficulty finding a doc to help

me. My Ped brushed us off onto some Psychologist who told me he would need to

do some testing, and that it costs between $500 and $1,000, and I would be

required to pay up front. Well, I can't do that, and that's nuts..... So, I

spent yesterday calling one doctor after another and getting the brush off, or

no return phone calls. Well, the school is getting the director of Spec Ed

involved to help me with this task, and to get the IEP meeting set. Here's the

biggest kicker. I've got a friend who's willing to take the boys to school in

the morning, but I have no after care. I went to the YMCA and signed and

Alec up for the latch key program. They would be in it from 3:15 to 4:15. I

spoke with the director of this program and explained what we were dealing with,

in terms of 's behavior. She said she had a son with defiant behavior, so

she could relate. She felt they could handle it, not to worry etc...... Well,

the Principal told me that she WILL NOT allow into that program, because

they are not equipped to handle him, and the school can't be responsible if

something happened to him, while there. I told her that I would loose my job,

and without a job, we would end up homeless. My husband pays a fair amount of

support, but not enough to raise 3 kids on, without employment. The Principal

said that they would help me find somewhere to put him, but that he definately

couldn't go to the latch key program. Well, I left there in tears, because I've

called many day cares and they either don't have room or they basically tell me

their program isn't right, because of being a " special needs child " . I

don't know what to do. I did get lucky when I went back to pick up Alec. The

Principal saw me and asked to speak to me again. She said that she wanted to

apologize for possibly " over stressing me " , because her secretary over heard the

whole conversation on day care, and pointed out to her that I would probably be

a basket case over the weekend and that she probably ruined my weekend. That's

an understatement. She told me that she called the director of the latch key

program, and they agreed to allow him to come next week, until I find something

else. What else, I don't know. There is a silver lining to this whole mess.

My sister has been playing match maker with a divorced father of two, so I've

made a new friend, thanks to my sister. Well, we are going out tonight and he

called right when I got home and I was in tears. He's incredibly generous and

offered to take his lunches during the school dismisal time, so he could pick up

from school and deliver him to me at work, permanently or temporarily. How

thoughtful, but that would get old quickly. So, I turn to all of you for

advise..... Advise on the IEP issue and where to go for daycare with my

hyperactive, defiant, child. He really does have a lovely side to him, I just

wish others would witness it, as much as I do. I don't have any friends here,

so finding someone to care for him at home is out. Any

ideas???????????????????? I hate to loose this job. I can't even begin to tell

you how incredible the pay is. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would

land a job like this.

On top of all this, I've been asked to attend a special team meeting on my older

son Alec. I suspected back last year that he has an LD, and his new 2nd grade

teacher agrees. She feels he's way too far behind, and lacks in maturity. He's

sweet, quiet, but emotional (cries easily). He has a horrible time staying on

task, focusing, and completing work. Must be a family trait! At least he has

great behavior!

Boy do I need a glass of wine....................... or a

sedative........(LOL)

a - Peoria IL mom to Alec 7, 5.4 (ASD/SID/Resolved Apraxia - and boy

can he speak now!), and 3.6

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August 31, 2001

Your son sounds like the PDD-NOS child I had in my room. He had a one

on one aide who shadowed him alllll day, even in the lunch room. I

would think you need to ask for that at your IEP. As for daycare-

that's a tough one. Could you afford to pay someone(church, college

student,another parent)to pick him up and care for him? I feel for

you.

Janelle

August 31, 2001

*

Hey a,

Hope you let us know how the date turns out!!!

(LJs mom) in New York

*

On Fri, 31 Aug 2001 15:50:40 -0500 " a Sessing "

writes:

.. There is a silver lining to this whole mess.

> My sister has been playing match maker with a divorced father of

> two, so I've made a new friend, thanks to my sister. Well, we are

> going out tonight and he called right when I got home and I was in

> tears. He's incredibly generous and offered to take his lunches

> during the school dismisal time, so he could pick up from

> school and deliver him to me at work, permanently or temporarily.

> How thoughtful,

________________________________________________________________

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September 5, 2001

My daughter had a horrible kindergarten experience too. I had her

moved to a new teacher that was much kinder to her. I also had a

meeting with the lead autism teacher for the county. She was so good

about coming up with suggestions. Unfortunately it didn't completely

eliminate the problems. I knew she was getting gluten/casein/soy etc

from somewhere. I started giving her the enzymes and the Kirkman's

folic acid w/B12 before school and putting enzymes in her drink for

lunch. This helped a lot!!

She is in first grade now. She has only had one bad day, and that

day I found a wrapper from someone else's lunch in her lunch box. I

am now giving her the folic acid with B12 and one alka seltzer gold

tablet dissolved in the morning before school. I took some to the

clinic at school and told them the minute she gets aggressive or

aggitated to GIVE HER AN ALKA SELTER TABLET. So far so good.

It is so hard to tell if some other child spilled milk on something

and they touch or lick it. There are so many possiblilites. Good luck

to you. It does get better. (I thought it was interesting that it

took one week of summer vacation for her to have a formed bowel

movement when we had been on the diet for the whole school year. She

was getting something somewhere!)

-- In GFCFKids@y..., " a Sessing " <pjandkids@m...> wrote:

>

> Well, my son is having a very difficult time at school. He's in a

spec. ed Kindergarten class. Things were getting better last week,

and than it took a turn for the worst. He did quite well on Thursday

and Friday of last week, and again on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday

this week. However, yesterday and today he was out of control. They

put him in the office

> for 1-1/2 hours today, and made him eat his lunch there too. They

returned him to the class at noon, and he behaved miserably. I was

called at 1:15 to pick him up from school. Apparently, he has no

attention span at school, and can't stay on task. He trys to get up

from his seat, and wander around, doing as he pleases. If the

teacher returns him to his work or tells him no, he screams at her

and talks back saying things like, " I don't have to " , " you can't make

me " , " no, I won't " , etc...... I'm sure you all get the picture.

Well, I called an emergency IEP meeting, and asked them to set it for

sometime next week. I told them that I understand their concern, and

I want to get this nipped, but I'm also starting a new job on

Wednesday (big bucks, and we need it), so I can't run to school and

pick him up everytime they can't deal with him. I was very nice

about the whole thing, but I told them that they were still obligated

to provide him an education, in the least restrictive environment,

and if he's too much to handle for 1 teacher and 2 aides in a class

of 12, than the school needs to higher a 1 on 1 aide for him. The

Principal brought up medicating him, and I agreed with wanting to try

it, but I'm having difficulty finding a doc to help me. My Ped

brushed us off onto some Psychologist who told me he would need to do

some testing, and that it costs between $500 and $1,000, and I would

be required to pay up front. Well, I can't do that, and that's

nuts..... So, I spent yesterday calling one doctor after another and

getting the brush off, or no return phone calls. Well, the school is

getting the director of Spec Ed involved to help me with this task,

and to get the IEP meeting set. Here's the biggest kicker. I've got

a friend who's willing to take the boys to school in the morning, but

I have no after care. I went to the YMCA and signed and Alec up

for the latch key program. They would be in it from 3:15 to 4:15. I

spoke with the director of this program and explained what we were

dealing with, in terms of 's behavior. She said she had a son

with defiant behavior, so she could relate. She felt they could

handle it, not to worry etc...... Well, the Principal told me that

she WILL NOT allow into that program, because they are not

equipped to handle him, and the school can't be responsible if

something happened to him, while there. I told her that I would

loose my job, and without a job, we would end up homeless. My

husband pays a fair amount of support, but not enough to raise 3 kids

on, without employment. The Principal said that they would help me

find somewhere to put him, but that he definately couldn't go to the

latch key program. Well, I left there in tears, because I've called

many day cares and they either don't have room or they basically tell

me their program isn't right, because of being a " special needs

child " . I don't know what to do. I did get lucky when I went back

to pick up Alec. The Principal saw me and asked to speak to me

again. She said that she wanted to apologize for possibly " over

stressing me " , because her secretary over heard the whole

conversation on day care, and pointed out to her that I would

probably be a basket case over the weekend and that she probably

ruined my weekend. That's an understatement. She told me that she

called the director of the latch key program, and they agreed to

allow him to come next week, until I find something else. What else,

I don't know. There is a silver lining to this whole mess. My

sister has been playing match maker with a divorced father of two, so

I've made a new friend, thanks to my sister. Well, we are going out

tonight and he called right when I got home and I was in tears. He's

incredibly generous and offered to take his lunches during the school

dismisal time, so he could pick up from school and deliver him

to me at work, permanently or temporarily. How thoughtful, but that

would get old quickly. So, I turn to all of you for advise.....

Advise on the IEP issue and where to go for daycare with my

hyperactive, defiant, child. He really does have a lovely side to

him, I just wish others would witness it, as much as I do. I don't

have any friends here, so finding someone to care for him at home is

out. Any ideas???????????????????? I hate to loose this job. I

can't even begin to tell you how incredible the pay is. Never in my

wildest dreams did I think I would land a job like this.

>

> On top of all this, I've been asked to attend a special team

meeting on my older son Alec. I suspected back last year that he has

an LD, and his new 2nd grade teacher agrees. She feels he's way too

far behind, and lacks in maturity. He's sweet, quiet, but emotional

(cries easily). He has a horrible time staying on task, focusing,

and completing work. Must be a family trait! At least he has great

behavior!

>

> Boy do I need a glass of wine....................... or a

sedative........(LOL)

>

> a - Peoria IL mom to Alec 7, 5.4 (ASD/SID/Resolved

Apraxia - and boy can he speak now!), and 3.6

>

> Get more from the Web. FREE MSN Explorer download :

http://explorer.msn.com

>

> Get more from the Web. FREE MSN Explorer download :

http://explorer.msn.com

>

September 6, 2001

I know my son isn't having any contamination issues, because I've got the school

totally paranoid about it. Also, my son refuses to touch any food unless an

adult tells him its ok. He has reached the age where he recognizes that gluten

and casein makes him feel yucky. He will scream if you try to feed him food he

isn't sure of, even if its candy.

The situation hasn't gotten much better, but I suspect it's more related to the

teacher and rather than my son. Anyway, I got them good on the YMCA refusal. I

sent in a letter stating that I had been advised that I needed written

confirmation that my disabled son was refused to participate in the after school

latch key program, and that I needed the principal or superintendant to sign it.

Well, it was sent back with a small note at the bottom: " Please feel free to

send your son to the latch key program. " Needless to say, he's been doing great

in it, which leads me to believe the teacher is the problem and not my son. For

one thing, he reports that she holds his wrist so tight it makes him cry!

Apparently, it's her way of keeping him from wandering. Well, I informed the

principal that this was not ok, no way. Our emergency IEP is scheduled for

monday, so wish me luck!

a

>>>>>>>.My daughter had a horrible kindergarten experience too. I had her