Really Bad Week!!! - very long sorry.

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone, and thanks again for all of the help you

have given me in the past. Right now I am really at a

loss (what else is new). My older son, , started

2nd grade last week. Just a quick background - last

yr for 1st grade he was on a 1/2 day schedule with

most of it spent in a self-contained classroom. He

had a set schedule that consisted of gross motor

sensory work when he got off of the bus and set breaks

and scheduled visits to the mainstream classroom. It

was my understanding (and its in the IEP) that this

year that was supposed to continue, with the only

difference being that they were going to start him off

on full days. Because of this, over the summer we had

him in summer school starting at 1/2 days, but working

up to whole days by the end of the session.

Unfortunately they didnt have an afternoon special ed

summer school program so for the afternoon they took

him to the park and had activities for him there.

Anyway, I also started the GFCF diet 3 weeks ago after

an allergist recommended getting rid of wheat and

dairy. Because of his sensory issues and Aspergers I

figured I would go all the way and do Gluten and

Casein instead of just wheat and dairy. Before that

he had been on Feingold diet for almost 2 years with

minimal changes - there were some slight changes that

were more noticeable when he slipped. Anyway, when I

started the GFCF diet we concentrated more on this

diet and he started to have foods that werent

necessarily approved on the Feingold diet (like fruit

snacks and Capri Sun drinks). The first 2 days of

school went great. He actually stayed most of the day

in the 2nd grade mainstream classroom and had no

meltdowns. Then we had the 3 day weekend and then

Tuesday I got a call from the principal that he was in

her office because he had lost control of himself when

it came time to make a transition and he hit his aid.

He also threw a book and it hit the principal in the

face. When she called me he was back under control

and he made it through the rest of the day. When he

got home, he spent the rest of the afternoon (until

supper) in his room and lost TV and Computer. We also

threw out all the fruit snacks and rollups. On

Wednesday I got another call from the principal that

was very out of control and that I needed to

come get him (this was at about 11:30am). Again, he

was in the middle of doing something and it was time

to clean up and he got upset because he couldnt finish

what he was doing and he started throwing the legos

and one hit another student. He also kicked his aid

and when they were bringing him downstairs he tried to

scratch, bite, kick and hit all the way down. When I

got there the administrator from the BOE was there and

both he and the resource room teacher were on either

side of him dragging him out of the school (with no

shoes on) to my car. The administrator hinted at the

possibility that the school he is at may not be the

best place for him, but that they will try to make

some changes first and hopefully it will work out. At

this time I found out that they have not been

following his IEP at all!!! He has not been getting a

morning workout before class, wednesday was the 1st

day he saw the OT out of 4 days of school, he hadnt

seen the school psychologist yet or the speech

therapist, and instead of being in the self contained

classroom most of the day and brought down gradually

to the mainstream, they just threw him in the

mainstream classroom (with his 1 on 1 aid) and took

him to self contained room for short breaks - not what

is in his IEP. When I asked about this they said that

they wanted him mainstreamed but that if it wasnt

working they would switch it back. They also said

that since he did good during the morning opening part

of class they didnt want him to miss that by having a

workout in the gym. The administrator commented that

his summer went so well and he finds it interesting

that school isnt going so well, and he was also amazed

that was able to calm himself down so quickly

once he got in the car - so this must not be a sensory

issue, just a manipulative one. I said that at summer

school he spent most of the day at the park running,

climbing, swimming and jumping so of course it went

good. And he said, well his aid is giving him deep

pressure - DUH! I also found out from our consultants

that we had the school hire (an OT specializing in DSI

and a family therapist from 0-3) that they have a

meeting scheduled for Monday to discuss my son and

when I asked the administrator why I wasnt told he

said it was a case management meeting I didnt need to

be there. I told him it was my son and I was going to

be there and he was pissed but told me the time. What

do I do??? I am so upset with the school but at the

same time I dont know why my son has become so

aggressive and what to do to help him. I really dont

want him on medication. Is this in response to the

school, the diet, me or what???? How can I help him.

No one wants us around with him, my husband is totally

frustrated with him, has spent the last couple

of days in his room all day for hitting the teachers,

and I dont know what else to try. The OT suggested

looking into a private, spec ed school and getting the

public school to admit they cant handle him, but that

scares me to death. Then to top it all off, my 2 year

old has started to line up shoes. I mean non-stop and

they have to be perfect and no one can touch them. I

start taking care of 2 little girls in a couple of

weeks because we really need the money, especially now

with the diet and everything else going on, and I dont

know how I am going to do this. Please, any advice

will be appreciated.

=====

Phyllis Parmelee

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