Re: Pacing tiger

[Guest guest]

Vicki: that is why I eat six meals. I can't go too long between each or I

will graze. I have a really big salad in the evening. All that chewing really

helps. Always some kind of cheese or other protein with it.

Fay Bayuk

**300/168

10/23/01

Dr.

Open RNY 150 cm

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[Guest guest]

Dear Buds,

I have thought about this post all day, and I finally decided to

come back and respond to it.

What I see described below (I took the pertinent part and deleted

the rest because my good friend, theDebutante, dislikes keeping an

entire original message) is exactly what I was pre-op. I would try

so hard... I would starve or exercise to excess or do whatever I was

going to do to try and lose all that weight. I would be successful

for some length of time and then *BAM*... I could not hold myself to

that self-sacrificing forever and would fall off the wagon and go

bezerk. Oftentimes, I could not get a grip on myself until the

damage I had done during the BAM time was such a steep climb that I

found it almost impossible to get back with it.

My opinion is about as good as nothing because the only person who

can address this situation is you, Vicki. But... I am going to

express my opinion anyway because I am old and stupid and cannot

resist sharing what little comprehension I have of this situation.

No one can live on a diet forever. No one can live on an extreme

exercise program forever. What must be found is something that can

be lived with. What I have discovered about eating and weight

maintenance is that I have to eat like I am eating for the rest of

my life. If I want to look a certain way, I have to eat a certain

way. Oh, there's moments when I can do this or that... but the

truth of the matter is, if I want to be thin, I have to eat like a

thin person. Thin people (who get at and remain at the same weight

for years) do not diet all the time; they eat the way they eat

because they are comfortable eating that way. People who are regular

exercisers do not exercise to extreme everyday; they find something

that is not an all consuming part of their day, and they do it

regularly like brushing their teeth. If an exercise program

requires one to give up the rest of a person's life (or even majorly

interferes with it), then chances are that a person will give up the

exercise program when anything in their life intervenes (and that

happens often with the way life seems to go).

So, what I think is that if anyone is white knuckling it, then they

have to find a way to live without doing that. Because no one can

suffer forever. If we could, then we would have done it before

surgery. I know I would have. And if I am starving to death, then

I am not following the right eating plan for me. And, if I am

eating a normal amount and I am still starving, then something is

wrong, and I have to find out what it is. Am I not getting the

right amount of nutrients? Do I have some kind of chemical

imbalance that needs to be addressed? Do I need to work with

someone or some group to overcome whatever my emotional needs are

that seem to need to be fed?

I don't know the answers, and I don't know you, Vicki. But, I know

what I read reminded me of the me who suffered daily preop. There's

gotta be a solution. I hope you won't wait until you can't suffer

anymore and then have a fall that finds you having more difficulty

getting back up from the fall than the white knuckling you are doing

now.

written out of admiration and empathy,

Okie Jan

Who doesn't know all the answers but sure knows a lot of the

questions.

I find myself pacing like a tiger at

> night, fighting the absolutely all consuming compulsion to snack.

I

> try to keep myself busy but it's like fighting an alien being in

my

> head.

>

>

> Smiles,

>

> Vicki A.

[Guest guest]

I'm with you, Fay. I know it was that old 3 meals a day routine that

got me over 300 pounds, so I decided to go with the 5-6 small meals a

day. So far it's working. (fingers, eyes, legs & everything else

crossed)

in NJ

**********************

> Vicki: that is why I eat six meals. I can't go too long between

each or I will graze.

> >

> Fay Bayuk

>