off topic - my son's behavior, again....long!

[Guest guest]

Well, my son is having a very difficult time at school. He's in a spec. ed

Kindergarten class. Things were getting better last week, and than it took a

turn for the worst. He did quite well on Thursday and Friday of last week, and

again on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday this week. However, yesterday and today

he was out of control. They put him in the office

for 1-1/2 hours today, and made him eat his lunch there too. They returned him

to the class at noon, and he behaved miserably. I was called at 1:15 to pick

him up from school. Apparently, he has no attention span at school, and can't

stay on task. He trys to get up from his seat, and wander around, doing as he

pleases. If the teacher returns him to his work or tells him no, he screams at

her and talks back saying things like, " I don't have to " , " you can't make me " ,

" no, I won't " , etc...... I'm sure you all get the picture. Well, I called an

emergency IEP meeting, and asked them to set it for sometime next week. I told

them that I understand their concern, and I want to get this nipped, but I'm

also starting a new job on Wednesday (big bucks, and we need it), so I can't run

to school and pick him up everytime they can't deal with him. I was very nice

about the whole thing, but I told them that they were still obligated to provide

him an education, in the least restrictive environment, and if he's too much to

handle for 1 teacher and 2 aides in a class of 12, than the school needs to

higher a 1 on 1 aide for him. The Principal brought up medicating him, and I

agreed with wanting to try it, but I'm having difficulty finding a doc to help

me. My Ped brushed us off onto some Psychologist who told me he would need to

do some testing, and that it costs between $500 and $1,000, and I would be

required to pay up front. Well, I can't do that, and that's nuts..... So, I

spent yesterday calling one doctor after another and getting the brush off, or

no return phone calls. Well, the school is getting the director of Spec Ed

involved to help me with this task, and to get the IEP meeting set. Here's the

biggest kicker. I've got a friend who's willing to take the boys to school in

the morning, but I have no after care. I went to the YMCA and signed and

Alec up for the latch key program. They would be in it from 3:15 to 4:15. I

spoke with the director of this program and explained what we were dealing with,

in terms of 's behavior. She said she had a son with defiant behavior, so

she could relate. She felt they could handle it, not to worry etc...... Well,

the Principal told me that she WILL NOT allow into that program, because

they are not equipped to handle him, and the school can't be responsible if

something happened to him, while there. I told her that I would loose my job,

and without a job, we would end up homeless. My husband pays a fair amount of

support, but not enough to raise 3 kids on, without employment. The Principal

said that they would help me find somewhere to put him, but that he definately

couldn't go to the latch key program. Well, I left there in tears, because I've

called many day cares and they either don't have room or they basically tell me

their program isn't right, because of being a " special needs child " . I

don't know what to do. I did get lucky when I went back to pick up Alec. The

Principal saw me and asked to speak to me again. She said that she wanted to

apologize for possibly " over stressing me " , because her secretary over heard the

whole conversation on day care, and pointed out to her that I would probably be

a basket case over the weekend and that she probably ruined my weekend. That's

an understatement. She told me that she called the director of the latch key

program, and they agreed to allow him to come next week, until I find something

else. What else, I don't know. There is a silver lining to this whole mess.

My sister has been playing match maker with a divorced father of two, so I've

made a new friend, thanks to my sister. Well, we are going out tonight and he

called right when I got home and I was in tears. He's incredibly generous and

offered to take his lunches during the school dismisal time, so he could pick up

from school and deliver him to me at work, permanently or temporarily. How

thoughtful, but that would get old quickly. So, I turn to all of you for

advise..... Advise on the IEP issue and where to go for daycare with my

hyperactive, defiant, child. He really does have a lovely side to him, I just

wish others would witness it, as much as I do. I don't have any friends here,

so finding someone to care for him at home is out. Any

ideas???????????????????? I hate to loose this job. I can't even begin to tell

you how incredible the pay is. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would

land a job like this.

On top of all this, I've been asked to attend a special team meeting on my older

son Alec. I suspected back last year that he has an LD, and his new 2nd grade

teacher agrees. She feels he's way too far behind, and lacks in maturity. He's

sweet, quiet, but emotional (cries easily). He has a horrible time staying on

task, focusing, and completing work. Must be a family trait! At least he has

great behavior!

Boy do I need a glass of wine....................... or a

sedative........(LOL)

a - Peoria IL mom to Alec 7, 5.4 (ASD/SID/Resolved Apraxia - and boy

can he speak now!), and 3.6

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