Re: OT-moderator other group-venting-long

[Guest guest]

Dear Pam,

Hell NO you are NOT being too sensitive. WLS, to me, is about a

process, a process of getting healthy. Sometimes, that involves

direct communication about the surgery, the experience, the problems,

the successes. Sometimes, it involves the emotional, the ups and

downs, the psychology of being fat, of getting healthy, of dealing

with plateaus, and sometimes, it just involves having something make

you feel happy, when life is getting you down.

Thank you for sharing your experience, and just IM not so HO....i

think that moderator is a weenie. I like this word, and it's the

only clean one I know, so feel free to substitute, relying on the

fact that I have a truck drivers vocabulary...no offense to any truck

drivers!

Huge hugs,

Theresa...(the other one!)

> I read previously here about the non-DS WLS support groups

moderators

> monitoring everything pro-DS/non-RNY. I think they are on a power

> kick and monitor everything! Following is an " incident " that

happened

> to me yesterday, after a really, really, terrible day.

>

> Someone had written in a response to an exercise question,

saying " So

> Diane bought me a tread-mill but that was a near tragedy. I had it

in

> the slowest speed walking along while I watched TV in the

background.

> Then suddenly, as before, I got so tired I could not put one foot

in

> front of the other. And the treadmill, without mercy, would throw

me

> off the back and if I did not fall clear of the walking service the

> belt would try to beat me up and gave me some nasty rub burns!

>

> So now my hunting dog sleeps on it when she is in the house. And of

> course I do not want to disturb her. So I don't do the treadmill

> thing anymore. I have even been tempted to turn it on while she

> sleeps and watch her get thrown off the back like I did. But I

don't

> want her to get hurt. I think it is just the devil tempting me with

> evil...He He ! "

>

> I had had a rotten day, and when I read this I just cracked up.

I

> had to tell the guy how he lightened my mood and helped brighten my

> day with this image. So I replied " I don't usually find myself

> laughing alone, especially when reading these posts, but I just

have

> to say you were hilarious. I am sorry to say I laughed when you

> described you treadmill experiences! I could just see this

> happening. I am really sorry that you got hurt. I thought that

> would be all the laughing, but I was wrong! That poor pup of

yours,

> if only she knew what you were thinking! I could imagine one of

my

> sons doing that when they were younger. How old did you say you

> were (his name)? Thanks for the laughs. "

>

> I get a response from the moderator saying " Since this note seems

> intended for (his name) alone, could I ask you to resend it

directly

> to him instead of to the entire list? " At the end of a bad day,

this

> was just the icing on the cake for me.

>

> I replied to the moderator, " Hi (So and so), my message was in

> response to a posting (his name) had made, and will probably be

> echoed by the group. I have seen many messages that were actually

> personal to other people on the group that don't seem to cause

> problems. I am very offended that one of the few times I respond

to

> something written I am rebuked. I could understand if I were

asking

> him to dinner, or talking to him about something that was unrelated

> to what had been previously posted, but this was only a response to

a

> posting about exercising and treadmills! "

>

> The moderator replied, " I'm sorry you're offended.Although the

> sentiments expressed in your note to (his name) are likely felt by

> many in the group, your comments were directed only to him. You are

> correct that notes that are personal replies appear on OSSG, but as

a

> rule those notes also convey information to the rest of the group,

> ask for support, or otherwise advance the group's discussion. On my

> reading, your note didn't do that. (his name) will be glad to have

> it, but I'm not sure what the other 4400 members of the group are

> supposed to make of it.If you care to resubmit it, we'll look at it

> again. But the question for us is how it relates to OSSG as a

group. "

>

> I thought these were support groups for individuals in a group

> setting. I guess the fact that I was " supported " , and so responded

> to let the person know, is not sufficient in their setting. I was

> really upset by this whole scenario.

>

> Then some one was looking for a ketchup recipe. I replied " I had

a

> recipe for ketchup. I will look for it when I get home from work

> tonight if you still would like one. I hope that this is of

interest

> to enough people in this group not to get rejected by the

moderators

> like my other response to a story told did. If it does get sent

back

> to me as being inappropriate, just remove my name from the list. "

> Apparently they rejected it, because I haven't received any more

> postings.

>

> I am feeling rejected by a group I joined as a support group. I am

> glad that this DS site is more open minded, and hope I haven't

> offended anyone by posting this, but I felt that I really had to

vent

> to get it off my chest. Hopefully our moderators won't reject

this,

> hopefully people who don't have time to read OT subjects won't have

> read it as they were forwarned, and hopefully I won't have offended

> any of the good readers here by posting this. I am getting

paranoid

> about opening my mouth (actually running my fingers.) Please be

kind

> in responding, my feelings have been hurt and need to mend before I

> get slammed again. Am I being too sensitive?

> Pam

[Guest guest]

Lemme guess... the moderator you're speaking of...

does her name rhyme with " monnie " ?

Actually, I'm not surprised at all. I hardly post

over there and, the few times I have, either my post

doesn't appear or it appears with her remarks on top.

She's famous for saying the RNY is what we should have

and don't even think of the DS. Honestly, I think it

was once or maybe twice that she didn't add onto my

posting.

When I was reading the beginning of your email, I was

laughing out loud. Thinking of the dog sleeping on

it... That WAS good!

Should we address remarks directly to the person?

Sometimes yes and sometimes no, in my opinion. If

it's something that others might benefit from or laugh

at or commiserate with, then absolutely. If it's

someone setting up a time to meet with another poster,

then I think it should be sent directly to the other

person. BUT... if everything's on the list, then it's

up to me to skip it if I don't want to read it.

Don't let her get you down, I don't think she's a very

happy person.

Take care,

dee

--- pbl4him@... wrote:

> I read previously here about the non-DS WLS support

> groups moderators

> monitoring everything pro-DS/non-RNY. I think they

> are on a power

> kick and monitor everything! Following is an

> " incident " that happened

> to me yesterday, after a really, really, terrible

> day.

>

> Someone had written in a response to an exercise

> question, saying " So

> Diane bought me a tread-mill but that was a near

> tragedy. I had it in

> the slowest speed walking along while I watched TV

> in the background.

> Then suddenly, as before, I got so tired I could not

> put one foot in

> front of the other. And the treadmill, without

> mercy, would throw me

> off the back and if I did not fall clear of the

> walking service the

> belt would try to beat me up and gave me some nasty

> rub burns!

>

> So now my hunting dog sleeps on it when she is in

> the house. And of

> course I do not want to disturb her. So I don't do

> the treadmill

> thing anymore. I have even been tempted to turn it

> on while she

> sleeps and watch her get thrown off the back like I

> did. But I don't

> want her to get hurt. I think it is just the devil

> tempting me with

> evil...He He ! "

>

> I had had a rotten day, and when I read this I

> just cracked up. I

> had to tell the guy how he lightened my mood and

> helped brighten my

> day with this image. So I replied " I don't usually

> find myself

> laughing alone, especially when reading these posts,

> but I just have

> to say you were hilarious. I am sorry to say I

> laughed when you

> described you treadmill experiences! I could just

> see this

> happening. I am really sorry that you got hurt. I

> thought that

> would be all the laughing, but I was wrong! That

> poor pup of yours,

> if only she knew what you were thinking! I could

> imagine one of my

> sons doing that when they were younger. How old

> did you say you

> were (his name)? Thanks for the laughs. "

>

> I get a response from the moderator saying " Since

> this note seems

> intended for (his name) alone, could I ask you to

> resend it directly

> to him instead of to the entire list? " At the end

> of a bad day, this

> was just the icing on the cake for me.

>

> I replied to the moderator, " Hi (So and so), my

> message was in

> response to a posting (his name) had made, and will

> probably be

> echoed by the group. I have seen many messages that

> were actually

> personal to other people on the group that don't

> seem to cause

> problems. I am very offended that one of the few

> times I respond to

> something written I am rebuked. I could understand

> if I were asking

> him to dinner, or talking to him about something

> that was unrelated

> to what had been previously posted, but this was

> only a response to a

> posting about exercising and treadmills! "

>

> The moderator replied, " I'm sorry you're

> offended.Although the

> sentiments expressed in your note to (his name) are

> likely felt by

> many in the group, your comments were directed only

> to him. You are

> correct that notes that are personal replies appear

> on OSSG, but as a

> rule those notes also convey information to the rest

> of the group,

> ask for support, or otherwise advance the group's

> discussion. On my

> reading, your note didn't do that. (his name) will

> be glad to have

> it, but I'm not sure what the other 4400 members of

> the group are

> supposed to make of it.If you care to resubmit it,

> we'll look at it

> again. But the question for us is how it relates to

> OSSG as a group. "

>

> I thought these were support groups for individuals

> in a group

> setting. I guess the fact that I was " supported " ,

> and so responded

> to let the person know, is not sufficient in their

> setting. I was

> really upset by this whole scenario.

>

> Then some one was looking for a ketchup recipe. I

> replied " I had a

> recipe for ketchup. I will look for it when I get

> home from work

> tonight if you still would like one. I hope that

> this is of interest

> to enough people in this group not to get rejected

> by the moderators

> like my other response to a story told did. If it

> does get sent back

> to me as being inappropriate, just remove my name

> from the list. "

> Apparently they rejected it, because I haven't

> received any more

> postings.

>

> I am feeling rejected by a group I joined as a

> support group. I am

> glad that this DS site is more open minded, and hope

> I haven't

> offended anyone by posting this, but I felt that I

> really had to vent

> to get it off my chest. Hopefully our moderators

> won't reject this,

> hopefully people who don't have time to read OT

> subjects won't have

> read it as they were forwarned, and hopefully I

> won't have offended

> any of the good readers here by posting this. I am

> getting paranoid

> about opening my mouth (actually running my

> fingers.) Please be kind

> in responding, my feelings have been hurt and need

> to mend before I

> get slammed again. Am I being too sensitive?

> Pam

>

>

>

>

----------------------------------------------------------------------

>

[Guest guest]

> Am I being too sensitive?

Hi Pam -

Not at all. In fact you should really be angry.

Best-

Nick in Sage

Dr. Keshishian

8/29/01

[Guest guest]

Ninnie (oh, I guess maybe it's Nonnie) needs lots of bran!

Best-

Nick in Sage

Re: OT-moderator other group-venting-long

> Lemme guess... the moderator you're speaking of...

> does her name rhyme with " monnie " ?

>

> Actually, I'm not surprised at all. I hardly post

> over there and, the few times I have, either my post

> doesn't appear or it appears with her remarks on top.

> She's famous for saying the RNY is what we should have

> and don't even think of the DS. Honestly, I think it

> was once or maybe twice that she didn't add onto my

> posting.

>

> When I was reading the beginning of your email, I was

> laughing out loud. Thinking of the dog sleeping on

> it... That WAS good!

>

> Should we address remarks directly to the person?

> Sometimes yes and sometimes no, in my opinion. If

> it's something that others might benefit from or laugh

> at or commiserate with, then absolutely. If it's

> someone setting up a time to meet with another poster,

> then I think it should be sent directly to the other

> person. BUT... if everything's on the list, then it's

> up to me to skip it if I don't want to read it.

>

> Don't let her get you down, I don't think she's a very

> happy person.

>

> Take care,

> dee

>

> --- pbl4him@... wrote:

> > I read previously here about the non-DS WLS support

> > groups moderators

> > monitoring everything pro-DS/non-RNY. I think they

> > are on a power

> > kick and monitor everything! Following is an

> > " incident " that happened

> > to me yesterday, after a really, really, terrible

> > day.

> >

> > Someone had written in a response to an exercise

> > question, saying " So

> > Diane bought me a tread-mill but that was a near

> > tragedy. I had it in

> > the slowest speed walking along while I watched TV

> > in the background.

> > Then suddenly, as before, I got so tired I could not

> > put one foot in

> > front of the other. And the treadmill, without

> > mercy, would throw me

> > off the back and if I did not fall clear of the

> > walking service the

> > belt would try to beat me up and gave me some nasty

> > rub burns!

> >

> > So now my hunting dog sleeps on it when she is in

> > the house. And of

> > course I do not want to disturb her. So I don't do

> > the treadmill

> > thing anymore. I have even been tempted to turn it

> > on while she

> > sleeps and watch her get thrown off the back like I

> > did. But I don't

> > want her to get hurt. I think it is just the devil

> > tempting me with

> > evil...He He ! "

> >

> > I had had a rotten day, and when I read this I

> > just cracked up. I

> > had to tell the guy how he lightened my mood and

> > helped brighten my

> > day with this image. So I replied " I don't usually

> > find myself

> > laughing alone, especially when reading these posts,

> > but I just have

> > to say you were hilarious. I am sorry to say I

> > laughed when you

> > described you treadmill experiences! I could just

> > see this

> > happening. I am really sorry that you got hurt. I

> > thought that

> > would be all the laughing, but I was wrong! That

> > poor pup of yours,

> > if only she knew what you were thinking! I could

> > imagine one of my

> > sons doing that when they were younger. How old

> > did you say you

> > were (his name)? Thanks for the laughs. "

> >

> > I get a response from the moderator saying " Since

> > this note seems

> > intended for (his name) alone, could I ask you to

> > resend it directly

> > to him instead of to the entire list? " At the end

> > of a bad day, this

> > was just the icing on the cake for me.

> >

> > I replied to the moderator, " Hi (So and so), my

> > message was in

> > response to a posting (his name) had made, and will

> > probably be

> > echoed by the group. I have seen many messages that

> > were actually

> > personal to other people on the group that don't

> > seem to cause

> > problems. I am very offended that one of the few

> > times I respond to

> > something written I am rebuked. I could understand

> > if I were asking

> > him to dinner, or talking to him about something

> > that was unrelated

> > to what had been previously posted, but this was

> > only a response to a

> > posting about exercising and treadmills! "

> >

> > The moderator replied, " I'm sorry you're

> > offended.Although the

> > sentiments expressed in your note to (his name) are

> > likely felt by

> > many in the group, your comments were directed only

> > to him. You are

> > correct that notes that are personal replies appear

> > on OSSG, but as a

> > rule those notes also convey information to the rest

> > of the group,

> > ask for support, or otherwise advance the group's

> > discussion. On my

> > reading, your note didn't do that. (his name) will

> > be glad to have

> > it, but I'm not sure what the other 4400 members of

> > the group are

> > supposed to make of it.If you care to resubmit it,

> > we'll look at it

> > again. But the question for us is how it relates to

> > OSSG as a group. "

> >

> > I thought these were support groups for individuals

> > in a group

> > setting. I guess the fact that I was " supported " ,

> > and so responded

> > to let the person know, is not sufficient in their

> > setting. I was

> > really upset by this whole scenario.

> >

> > Then some one was looking for a ketchup recipe. I

> > replied " I had a

> > recipe for ketchup. I will look for it when I get

> > home from work

> > tonight if you still would like one. I hope that

> > this is of interest

> > to enough people in this group not to get rejected

> > by the moderators

> > like my other response to a story told did. If it

> > does get sent back

> > to me as being inappropriate, just remove my name

> > from the list. "

> > Apparently they rejected it, because I haven't

> > received any more

> > postings.

> >

> > I am feeling rejected by a group I joined as a

> > support group. I am

> > glad that this DS site is more open minded, and hope

> > I haven't

> > offended anyone by posting this, but I felt that I

> > really had to vent

> > to get it off my chest. Hopefully our moderators

> > won't reject this,

> > hopefully people who don't have time to read OT

> > subjects won't have

> > read it as they were forwarned, and hopefully I

> > won't have offended

> > any of the good readers here by posting this. I am

> > getting paranoid

> > about opening my mouth (actually running my

> > fingers.) Please be kind

> > in responding, my feelings have been hurt and need

> > to mend before I

> > get slammed again. Am I being too sensitive?

> > Pam

> >

> >

> >

> >

> ----------------------------------------------------------------------

> >