Re: Thinking twice about surgery...is it worth it?

[Guest guest]

Hi ~ I can certainly understand where you're coming from.

Most things in our lives seem selfish when you compare them to the

terrible things going on in Asia and Africa etc. I had wanted my

underbite fixed since high school but it kept getting put off ~ I'm

27 now and finally getting it done. I can tell you that it does NOT

get better, and even though I am more comfortable with myself since

college, I am no less self-conscious of it and it is not any easier

to talk. I really regret that I didn't have it done a long time ago

as my 20s would have been a lot different.

You only get one life and it goes by very quickly ~ if this is

something that will greatly improve your communication skills and

your self-esteem, then why not have it done? Your quality of life

will be so much better, not just immediately, but in the long run

too. This surgery isn't a cosmetic procedure, but most of us tend

to focus on the cosmetic benefits ~ it's only natural when you feel

the need to hide your face/smile, it would be such a relief if you

didn't have to worry about it. Our mental health is just as

important as our physical health although it's hard to remember that

sometimes!

You are lucky to have the support from your parents and the

resources to do this now. Could part of your hesitation be a case

of nerves? When I was younger I sometimes thought it would be easier

just to live with my " deformity " than go through such a surgery or

even have braces ~ as I always hated drawing attention to myself.

We all deserve a chance to live our lives to the fullest, so I hope

you can see that it's okay to put ourselves first sometimes.

Especially when it will have such an impact on the rest of your

life! Good luck with everything, and feel free to vent here more

often ~ lots of us do=)

>

> I am planning to have upper and lower surgery (for my underbite)

as

> well as an upper palate expansion sometime in the next year and a

> half. My surgeon is a full day of traveling away (I'm from NY,

he's

> in NC), and I'm going to him because supposedly my case is very

> complicated and I need a very experienced surgeon. I'm a college

> student and I'm lucky enough to have my parents' support,

insurance,

> and financial advantages.

>

> We've already flown to NC once for the initial evaluation, and

we'll

> be flying back there many many more times. However, when I look

> back at this short excursion to NC and all the trouble my parents

> are going through to make this happen for me, I feel insanely

> selfish. I am in no pain in my current jaw situation, and

although

> it creates functional problems in terms of my bite, chewing,

> speaking, and general movement of the jaw, I know that this

surgery

> isn't a necessity for my survival. I also know that if my

underbite

> didn't create such self-esteem issues, and if the surgery wasn't

> going to have any positive physical changes, I wouldn't be going

> through with the surgery. I'm not expecting to look much

different,

> and my main concern is having a functional bite in the end. I

know

> that with this I can at least expect to have my underbite fixed,

and

> this will change my life in so many ways.

>

> But is this enough?? My self-esteem will likely improve and I'll

> have a functional bite. Is that worth all the days of traveling,

> money spent on orthodontic work and higher insurance rates, and

> stress I'm putting my parents through? The more serious I become

> about having surgery, the more I start to question myself. I know

> I'm a very strong person and can handle having this

> extreme " deformity " for the rest of my life. I start to feel like

> such a baby (and did I mention selfish) for wanting to have my

bite

> fixed when I think about all the other horrid problems people have

> around the world.

>

> I can't tell you how badly I want a functional bite, but I can't

get

> these feelings out of my head. Has anyone else felt similarly?

> Thanks for listening.

[Guest guest]

Yes, other people have had these issues.

And if they are crucial to you, be sure to ask your surgeon and/or

orthodontist to talk with you about them. The experts can help you

better than can I.

But -- put it in another context. Let us suppose that you had, say,

a clubbed foot, or a cleft palate.

Yep. You could live with either, even with both. But think how much

richer your life would be with the repair of either or both. And,

I'll bet that if you ask your parents, they'll tell you that an

investment in their child's true health and happiness is the one

they are most privileged to make.

Pension accounts and endowment trusts are rewarding, I'm sure, but

not in the way an offspring's real happiness and ability to function

can be. And believe me, unless you are far removed from the typical,

repair of your jaw structure, sooner or later, will prove essential

to the workings of your mouth, and perhaps your digestion and

nutrition, as well.

Dysfunctional bites generally do not improve all by themselves. So

if it's possible, get it fixed, is my take on the whole thing. And

nope. I don't think that's selfish one bit.

If you wish, you can then take your functional mouth and jaws, and

go to work doing whatever kind of human service seems most

appropriate, whether it's as a loving wife and mother, or serving

starving folks in Indonesia or India -- or even in the good ole

U.S.A. (Yep. We do have some, too.)

Cammie

>

> I am planning to have upper and lower surgery (for my underbite)

as

> well as an upper palate expansion sometime in the next year and a

> half. My surgeon is a full day of traveling away (I'm from NY,

he's

> in NC), and I'm going to him because supposedly my case is very

> complicated and I need a very experienced surgeon. I'm a college

> student and I'm lucky enough to have my parents' support,

insurance,

> and financial advantages.

>

> We've already flown to NC once for the initial evaluation, and

we'll

> be flying back there many many more times. However, when I look

> back at this short excursion to NC and all the trouble my parents

> are going through to make this happen for me, I feel insanely

> selfish. I am in no pain in my current jaw situation, and

although

> it creates functional problems in terms of my bite, chewing,

> speaking, and general movement of the jaw, I know that this

surgery

> isn't a necessity for my survival. I also know that if my

underbite

> didn't create such self-esteem issues, and if the surgery wasn't

> going to have any positive physical changes, I wouldn't be going

> through with the surgery. I'm not expecting to look much

different,

> and my main concern is having a functional bite in the end. I

know

> that with this I can at least expect to have my underbite fixed,

and

> this will change my life in so many ways.

>

> But is this enough?? My self-esteem will likely improve and I'll

> have a functional bite. Is that worth all the days of traveling,

> money spent on orthodontic work and higher insurance rates, and

> stress I'm putting my parents through? The more serious I become

> about having surgery, the more I start to question myself. I know

> I'm a very strong person and can handle having this

> extreme " deformity " for the rest of my life. I start to feel like

> such a baby (and did I mention selfish) for wanting to have my

bite

> fixed when I think about all the other horrid problems people have

> around the world.

>

> I can't tell you how badly I want a functional bite, but I can't

get

> these feelings out of my head. Has anyone else felt similarly?

> Thanks for listening.

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

YES!! IT IS WORTH IT!!

I am 43 years old and have waited 27 years to have my surgery. My

parents said NO WAY! when they heard what I was supposed to have. I

had an extreme overbite and each new dentist and orthodontist I went

to told me I needed surgery.

Well, I finally had it after 27 years and I feel great! My

confidence level has increased immensely. I wish I would have had

this confidence when I was 16. My life would be completely

different. Not only did I get my bite fixed, I no longer have those

nasty buck teeth.

So YES! By all means it is worth it.

>

> I am planning to have upper and lower surgery (for my underbite) as

> well as an upper palate expansion sometime in the next year and a

> half. My surgeon is a full day of traveling away (I'm from NY,

he's

> in NC), and I'm going to him because supposedly my case is very

> complicated and I need a very experienced surgeon. I'm a college

> student and I'm lucky enough to have my parents' support,

insurance,

> and financial advantages.

>

> We've already flown to NC once for the initial evaluation, and

we'll

> be flying back there many many more times. However, when I look

> back at this short excursion to NC and all the trouble my parents

> are going through to make this happen for me, I feel insanely

> selfish. I am in no pain in my current jaw situation, and although

> it creates functional problems in terms of my bite, chewing,

> speaking, and general movement of the jaw, I know that this surgery

> isn't a necessity for my survival. I also know that if my

underbite

> didn't create such self-esteem issues, and if the surgery wasn't

> going to have any positive physical changes, I wouldn't be going

> through with the surgery. I'm not expecting to look much

different,

> and my main concern is having a functional bite in the end. I know

> that with this I can at least expect to have my underbite fixed,

and

> this will change my life in so many ways.

>

> But is this enough?? My self-esteem will likely improve and I'll

> have a functional bite. Is that worth all the days of traveling,

> money spent on orthodontic work and higher insurance rates, and

> stress I'm putting my parents through? The more serious I become

> about having surgery, the more I start to question myself. I know

> I'm a very strong person and can handle having this

> extreme " deformity " for the rest of my life. I start to feel like

> such a baby (and did I mention selfish) for wanting to have my bite

> fixed when I think about all the other horrid problems people have

> around the world.

>

> I can't tell you how badly I want a functional bite, but I can't

get

> these feelings out of my head. Has anyone else felt similarly?

> Thanks for listening.

[Guest guest]

Thank you so much for all of your kind, extremely helpful words of

wisdom. I joined this board in the beginning of the fall, and it

has continually provided much support and advice. You've all

written exactly what I've been trying to put into words for quite

awhile.

It's very true that there are only benefits to having surgery young,

including because you still have the support of your parents. This

is clearly the most opportune time for me to have this surgery, and

I definitely won't pass it up. I certainly agree that my life will

be much more full in all aspects as a result. I actually plan on

helping others as a career - I'll be applying to medical school next

fall (as soon as I get through taking the MCAT's!).

Thanks for sharing your experiences and allowing those of us just

beginning this process to learn from them!

>

> >

> > I am planning to have upper and lower surgery (for my underbite)

as

> > well as an upper palate expansion sometime in the next year and

a

> > half. My surgeon is a full day of traveling away (I'm from NY,

> he's

> > in NC), and I'm going to him because supposedly my case is very

> > complicated and I need a very experienced surgeon. I'm a

college

> > student and I'm lucky enough to have my parents' support,

> insurance,

> > and financial advantages.

> >

> > We've already flown to NC once for the initial evaluation, and

> we'll

> > be flying back there many many more times. However, when I look

> > back at this short excursion to NC and all the trouble my

parents

> > are going through to make this happen for me, I feel insanely

> > selfish. I am in no pain in my current jaw situation, and

although

> > it creates functional problems in terms of my bite, chewing,

> > speaking, and general movement of the jaw, I know that this

surgery

> > isn't a necessity for my survival. I also know that if my

> underbite

> > didn't create such self-esteem issues, and if the surgery wasn't

> > going to have any positive physical changes, I wouldn't be going

> > through with the surgery. I'm not expecting to look much

> different,

> > and my main concern is having a functional bite in the end. I

know

> > that with this I can at least expect to have my underbite fixed,

> and

> > this will change my life in so many ways.

> >

> > But is this enough?? My self-esteem will likely improve and

I'll

> > have a functional bite. Is that worth all the days of

traveling,

> > money spent on orthodontic work and higher insurance rates, and

> > stress I'm putting my parents through? The more serious I

become

> > about having surgery, the more I start to question myself. I

know

> > I'm a very strong person and can handle having this

> > extreme " deformity " for the rest of my life. I start to feel

like

> > such a baby (and did I mention selfish) for wanting to have my

bite

> > fixed when I think about all the other horrid problems people

have

> > around the world.

> >

> > I can't tell you how badly I want a functional bite, but I can't

> get

> > these feelings out of my head. Has anyone else felt similarly?

> > Thanks for listening.