Guest guest Posted June 16, 2003 Report Share Posted June 16, 2003 In a message dated 6/16/2003 6:37:44 AM Eastern Standard Time, ng5y@... writes: > I just feel out of control right now. I hate being > out of control. > > All I can say is " therapy. " Many people use their obesity to protect them from doing things that are not in their best interest. I know a fellow doing time for something he wouldn't have done preop. A good therapist might have prescribed some meds to calm urges until therapy uncovers the problem. Fay Bayuk **300/168 10/23/01 Dr. Open RNY 150 cm Click for My Profile <A HREF= " http://obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/profile.phtml?N=Bayuk951061008 " >http:\ //obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/profile.phtml?N=Bayuk951061008</A> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 16, 2003 Report Share Posted June 16, 2003 I completely understand and I can only tell you what worked for me. When I spent my entire life searching, wondering about purpose in life and in general wondering what would fill the gapping hole that I stuffed with food to no avail.........I found nothing of this world would work. Friends, food, family...nothing filled the " hole " all of these things let me down and disappointed me. Then I found the Lord. This is not a plee to convert...this is a fact for me. We have a soul that hungers for peace and contentment. It hungers for acceptance and a perfect love that is unconditional. It continues to hunger and we continue to fill it with the wrong things and never find that peace that surpasses all understanding. People disappoint us... Food hurts us and is often our weapon of choice... Drugs and cigarettes and booze never work... Rich people are often still unhappy, so money isn't the answer... When I realized the actual truth of my existance and found my " higher power " ..I also found a peace. With that I found a love and acceptance of others. I also learned how to forgive. My answers were in the Bible. I am down 155 lbs now and it seems maintaining it is much easier then I thought. I think it is because I have resolved some of the issues that made me fat to begin with. The search that never ended did indeed end and I can accept myself and others and love them for who they are and not what I expect from them. People were not put on this earth to meet MY needs and make ME happy and I have no right to expect that. I have made my peace with food and my soul and put them in their proper perspective. Nothing in life fills the " hole " you are trying to fill...maybe you want to look elsewhere. Just one girls story. God bless you, Carol G. > I just woke up from a nightmare. Could not go back to sleep. I have > been so successful. I have exceeded even my doctor's expectations > for me. But last night I was being outright stupid. Before bed I was > doing the kinds of things I used to do before the surgery. I actauly > raided the fridge and ate in the course of watching a movie what > amounts to todays breakfast and lunch. > > OK OK, so if that was before the surgery, what I ate would amount to > a snack and little else. > > I have lost 329 lbs so far and only 39 more lbs to go till goal. No > that's not a misprint. 329 lbs lost in only 16 mnths. I have my > consult for a TT this week. I have been waiting months and months > for that. > > Unresolved issues, especialy ones that I have no control over drive > me nuts. I realize now that I am just stressing out over several > unresolved issues. Some that I have no control over. Some grudges > that I need to drop. Guilty feelings over how I treat my wife. Our > marrige was on the rocks before the WLS. It teaterd near total > failure in the months after. Both things I have done and she has > done. > > Saturday we celebrated on 11th anniversary. But I was feeling like I > stayed with her more out of friendship and convenience and loyalty > rather than love. But she does love me. And I know that deep down I > love her. > > Being close to goal has brought new temptaions to me, and not just > food temptations. I just feel out of control right now. I hate being > out of control. > > > OK I will be painfully honnest with all of you. My wife has been > unfaithful to me in the past. Not just with men but wemon too. After > the surgery and a couple of hundred pounds I had an affair myself. > That's over, my wife and I have worked through it. Yes she caught > me. But all that is water under the bridge. > > But I am just having issues with myself, always wanting more than I > have. Never being satisfied with what I do have. Perhaps I am just > now understanding what drove me to almost 600lbs. Trying to fill > something that's empty. Something I can't even define. > > . http://home.attbi.com/~ng5y/photo.htm Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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