reassurance & reenforcement

[Guest guest]

Hi again everyone. It's been a couple of weeks since my one and only

(intro.)post a couple of weeks ago, but I read all of yours daily and

am glad to see many of you are still plugging along and losing those

lbs! Keep up the good work. You're inspiration to me and the other

pre-opers out there.

Anyway, I was wondering how some of you made it through not only the

pre-op jitters and doubts, but how you handled friends and family

memebers who told you you were crazy for contemplating the surgery.

I've told just about all of my close friends and only have my parents

yet to tell. I've been procrastinating telling them fearing they'll

be worried sick (especially since losing my brother earlier this

year), and am thinking I'll wait 'til closer to the surgery date

(11/6)to do so.

Anyhow, I've been researching WLS for over a year now, and came

across DS some time early this summer (thankgoodness!). I did a lot

of thinking and soul searching before coming to the decision the

surgery was something I wanted, and that it would be the solution to

conquering a lifelong battle with my weight. I came to this

conclusion on my own and wanted to be sure before I told anyone. And

while most of my friends have been very supportive (and nervous too,

which is understandble), I've come across a couple who question why I

would do something so radical. Their logic is that I'm young (I say

relatively, at 35), " beautiful " (their words, not mine), and healthy

(which I have to point out that is NOW), so why would I fix something

that's not broken? I do understand this logic, as those thoughts have

crossed my mind too, but realize that it would only be a matter of

time. I'm lucky not to have any co-morbidities(besides moderate

asthama,which I'm not sure how much or little has to do with the

extra weight-though I'm sure it doesn't help)which only makes the

decision that much harder, but I don't have to read all your posts to

know that they will eventually catch up to me. I can also honestly

say that I don't have one more diet in me, so if it's not this, I'm

done; a life resigned to being a BBW. Happy but not as happy, or

healthy, as I think a thinner me would be.

To add insult to injury, my surgeon, Dr. Ren, may stop, or limit,

perfoming DS surgeries in the future. I totally trust in her ability

as a surgeon and her discretion to choose the best and safest surgery

for her patients, but needless to say, that information has me a bit

concerned. I am not sure of her reasons, but hope to find out in a

reply to an e-mail I sent her this afternoon.

Sorry for rambling. I guess the point of this post is to see how some

of you handled the Doubting es in your life, pre-op,

and...needing a little reassurance that I'm going to undergo

something wonderful that will change my life in countless positive

ways (as it seems to have done for many, if not all, of you), even if

it's an often scary thought(as evidenced by my waking up thinking

about it in the middle of the night)! It feels right and has given me

a light at the end of the tunnel. So, I'm willing to have faith, be

brave and forge ahead. But any suggestions, words of wisdom, or kind

thoughts would be appreciated. Thanks!

~ D. in NYC

pre-op 11/6/01 Dr. Ren

BMI 49