Re: Coby's surgery & Moms' whinning

[Guest guest]

Hey danielle!!

you vent away any time girl!!! i will keep your whole family in my

thoughts and prayers!!! i know what you mean about the diets, i am

doing weight watchers too plus trying to cram cal. down

christopher's throat!!! it is always something!!! good luck!!!

((HUGS))

jodie c

[Guest guest]

le - I totally understand the feeling of drowning. You feel

so overwhelmed that you just want to curl up under the covers and

stay there. THere are times that I would think that if I started to

cry, I wouldn't be able to stop. We get so we are on autopilot.

And the bottom line is that most people outside of our family have

no idea what we go through -- yeah, Coby may look good to them but

they don't realize the price you pay every day to get him that way.

Then there are the spouses -- I won't go there. But the fact is

that in most families (some are luckier than others), one spouse

does the majority of the health care dealings than the other

(whether it be husband or wife). The opposite spouse, from most

stories I have heard, simply doesn't understand the amount of time

and energy it takes to navigate the health care system. And don't

even mention having to bring siblings along for the doctors' appts!

You can barely listen to the doctor while you separate the two kids

from fighting, throwing things, opening drawers,etc.

So, what advice can I give you? There is one most important thing.

SLEEP. As you know I had surgery a couple of weeks ago, and since

then, for the first time in probably 5 years, I am dreaming again.

Turns out the sleep study showed I was waking 7 times an hour. I

never reached REM sleep so I never dreamed -- and I was eternally

exhausted (doctors kept telling me I was just tired because I was a

mom).

I have felt so much better these last 2 weeks. My life is even more

complicated right now due to overcommitments, but 2 months ago,

being placed in this same situation, I would be a wreck. Having

such improved sleep has enabled me to better handle all the balls

juggling without losing it.

So, how can you get more sleep? I don't know what your situation is

like -- but one idea is that you sit down with your husband and

explain that you need 2 nights away. You'll come back each morning

to take care of the kids, etc. THen you need to find a parent,

friend, or someone who has a quiet house nearby that you can go at

night after the kids are asleep and sleep at their house. You need

two nights of uninterrupted sleep. Yes, your husband may say " well,

I have to go to work, etc. " but you can politely remind him that you

work all day too. HA!

If you can hire a babysitter, even better. NAPS are essential. FOR

MOM! Can you pay the older kids to watch the younger ones for an

hour? Put a great video on, make some popcorn and put a plate on

the table with some yummy treats, and then go upstairs for an hour

nap. Worse case -- I would put my kids IN MY ROOM with a video and

snacks, lock my door, and I would put ear plugs in my ears and

actually take a nap in the same room....

Sleep is going to be your most important ally. You can not function

without sleep. The other stuff you can begin to tackle one item at

a time, but being sleep-deprived makes it oh so much harder.

I wish I lived close and I could take the twins for an afternoon.

Is there anyone you know? The problem is that you need a nap every

afternoon for a couple days consistently. Or two good straight

nights. One night, or one nap, will not fix things. Don't let the

spouse say " but I let you get 8 hours of sleep last night "

(unfortunately, one night of sleep doesn't fix the prior 6 months of

no sleep).

I bet there are many people on this listserve who wish they could

help you out! Just know we're here in spirit if not next to you in

body. Salem

>

> Hi everyone,

>

> I try not to complain much and I do a pretty good job of keeping

> things with Coby in perspective, but I'm starting to drown. I

guess

> I just need to vent to someone who actually understands and

doesn't

> look at me like I'm blowing things out of proportion.

>

> I haven't been able to sleep in a month so that is probably my

first

> problem. 2nd is that Coby has to go in for surgery AGAIN tomorrow

> for his 3rd set of tubes. Hubby has to work, down side of being

the

> owner. That leaves me to take the twins by myself to the hospital

> for Coby's surgery. He goes back to the hospital the following

day

> for the appt with the neuro to see what is going on with his

> seizures and his mood changes. 3rd the hosp is 2 hrs away and we

> have at least 2 appts a week for the next 5 weeks there. 4th he

has

> to have ANOTHER hypospadias repair, which will be #4! 5th I don't

> feel like he's getting enough calories and I struggle with him

each

> day to eat and I feel like it's a losing battle most days, but

> everyone thinks he looks good so no one else worries about his

> weight. 6th my husband was just diagnosed with Diabetes so we are

> going through the nutritional classes for him and then reversing

> everything for Coby. I swear with the diets, joining weight

> watchers, exercising and live style changes that are going on in

> this house, if Dr. H mentions me being overweight at the

convention

> this time I'll bite her head off and pretend it's the chocolate I

so

> love and miss…hehehehe! Oh, that thought made me feel better…

> lol

>

> Ok, I'm done whining. Thanks so much for listening to me. Take

> care and please keep Coby in your thoughts and prayers through the

> next few weeks of tests and his surgery.

>

> le, mom to:

> Shye 10, Brock 8, and Coby & Carlee 2 yr old twin terrors!

> Coby's new stats: 21 lbs, 33 in, Humatrope GH, Periactin, Protein

S

> Deficiency, and now possible Absence seizures.