Re: Need help in justifying WLS

[Guest guest]

Some people have NO IDEA what the MO live with each and every day and WILL

NOT be told. Others however, just are really concerned out of love and

caring. My father was terrified at the idea of me having surgery! I am his

first born and we have always had an extremely close relationship, really

close now since he depends on me so much since my mom passed away 8 years

ago.

I sat down and wrote him a LONG (about 5 or 6 pages typed) letter about my

history of dieting. He had forgotten or maybe never even knew that a doctor

had put me on diet pills before I was out of high school! I went through

all the diets and battles and failures to control my obesity. I explained

the " problems " with fitting into booth when out eating, having to use the

handicapped bathroom because if I use the regular one I have to sit on the

toilet to shut the door behind me. I told him that with another 20 pounds

or so...I'm afraid that I will be unable to wipe my own behind! I even

expressed the changes in my sex life with my husband as I continue to get

bigger (not real graphic but enought to let him understand a few things)! I

told him about the " looks " we (fat people) get if we are in public eating or

grocery shopping and have something sweet or " fattening " in our plate or in

the buggy. I was just open and honest about these things (and so many more

I know that you understand and know)....

Then I explained the benefits of surgery. What I could expect. I discussed

the possible complications. I expained the amount of research I have done

and about my consult with Dr. Booth. I figured out what he would have to

weigh to have my same BMI (67 - 68). He was shocked at what he would have

to weigh and knew that he would barely be able to move! I am only 5 feet

tall but I weigh 350 pounds. That doesn't sound like a huge amount but it

is for someone 5 feet tall! His eyes began to see and his heart began to

understand how strong in spirit a super morbidly obese person has to be to

continue to have a full life!

He is still afraid for his " little girl " to go under the knife...any parent

who loves their child would be...but he now understands and supports me

fully. My husband and the rest of my family and church family are all for

it and are keeping me in their prayers. I am one of the lucky ones, my

husband makes me feel like I am a sex goddess, my family treats me no

different than the " skinny ones " and to my church family I am simply another

one of the " sisters in the church " . All the important people in my life see

the real me and not the weight. The doctors are surpised when they find

that I am a healthy 350 pound woman, I sleep flat with only a pillow, need

no assistance in walking, can still run after the 2 year old in the Sunday

school class I teach, etc.

I chose to fight with the insurance company to have this surgery because at

43, I can feel the " little problems " beginning to creep in that are weigh

related...knee pains, fluid retention, etc. I chose to control once and for

all my disease of obesity and get on with my life!!

If you could take a pill once a day for the rest of your life and control

obesity...everyone would think you stupid if you didn't do it...but surgery

is a bigger step. Funny how WLS is still considered by many to be " cosmetic

surgery " instead of the life saving surgery that it is!!

Good Luck

Jerry, Southern Gal from Louisiana waiting on insurance approval

>From: KathieSL@...

>Reply-To: duodenalswitch

>To: duodenalswitch

>Subject: Need help in justifying WLS

>Date: Wed, 31 Oct 2001 16:17:10 EST

>

>Recently, I have been having constant arguments with my very confident (and

>thin) brother who is at the tender and ignorant age of 23.

>

>I am in tears because he tells me ridiculous things like, " if you want to

>lose weight, just diet and exercise - start small. " It's insulting and

>hurtful. He's been thin and fit his entire life, whereas myself, I have

>been

>dealing with weight issues my entire life. We are 8 years apart in age, so

>he was too young to see what I went through with my weight while living at

>home. I am the only big person in my family (I take after my real father

>whom I was not raised by.) Are there any resouces out there (in plain

>english - the boy is not too bright) that explain why " diet and exercise "

>don't always work for the morbidly obese?

>

>I understand that I don't HAVE to explain anything this pain the arse, but

>he

>is my brother and in other ways we are close. I wish I could just make him

>see that things are different physiologically for we " morbid obese. " There

>are so many factors involved - I have had sleep apnea since childhood, I

>have

>PCO, food allergies, etc. He doesn't understand how " simply " making the

>stomach smaller and re-routing the intestines will be so dramatically

>different than good ole diet and exercise.

>

>I am in tears here after this latest argument - it hurts so bad when people

>think that I am just lazy and don't want to get it in gear, kwim?

>

>Man, between his attitude and BCBS (who denied me this week and refused any

>appeals) I am ready to slit my wrists (not really, but I feel quite low,

>kwim?)

>

>Kathie

>

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