joke

[Guest guest]

THREE MEN IN A RESTROOM > >In the restroom, an accountant, a lawyer and a farmer were standing >side-by-side using the urinals. > >The accountant finished, zipped up and started washing and literally >scrubbing his hands ... clear up to his elbows....he used about 20 paper

>towels before he finished. He turned to the other two men and commented,

"I >graduated from Harvard and they taught us to be sanitary." > >The lawyer finished, zipped up and quickly wet the tips of his fingers, >grabbed one paper towel and commented, "I graduated from the University

of >Texas with a Law degree and they taught us to be environmentally

conscious." > > >The farmer zipped up and as he was walking out the door said, "I

graduated >from West Virginia University......... and they taught us not to pee on

our >hands.

[Guest guest]

Good one, lol 

 

Yep.  Speaking of sick & twisted, I don't remember if this joke has been on here before, but I'll post it again, with a Hoosier twist.

 

Stumpy and his wife Martha went to the Indiana State Fair every year.Every year Stumpy would say, " Martha, I'd like to ride in that there airplane. "

And every year Martha would say, " I know, Stumpy, but that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars. "

This one year Stumpy and Martha went to the fair and Stumpy said, " Martha, I'm 71 years old.  If I don't ride that airplane this year I may never get another chance. "

Martha replied, " Stumpy, that there airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars. "

The pilot overheard them and said, " Folks, I'll make you a deal.  I'll take you both up for a ride.  If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say one word, I won't charge you, but if you say one word it's ten dollars. "

Stumpy and Martha agree and up they go.  The pilot does all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard.  He does all his tricks over again, but still not a word.  They land and the pilot turns to Stumpy, " By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn't. "

Stumpy replied, " Well, I was gonna say something when Martha fell out, but ten dollars is ten dollars. "

 

Ramblin' RoseModerator

 A merry heart is good medicine.  Proverbs 17:22 

  

To: Neurosarcoidosis From: mebramer@...Date: Thu, 26 Aug 2010 23:26:51 -0600

Subject: Re: Disability

It's the sick twisted humor in life that gets us through. lol

 

Eww, , you are a sick individual!  i assumed they were like transplanted organs or something.

Ramblin' RoseModerator  

 

It's not that life is so short-------It's that we wait so long to begin. 

(attributed to Wooden, among others) 

 

To: Neurosarcoidosis From: mary_s777@...Date: Thu, 26 Aug 2010 15:54:07 -0700

Subject: Re: Disability

well you might not want to eat just anybody's body....but they are all 70 by then so it probably wouldn't matter....lol.  it would be like eating 'old' leftovers....lol.Life may not always be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we might as well dance!

 

Marla, I know that Connie is a disability certifier (? title) in Florida, but she is very knowledgeable about the process.  We do have lots of stuff in the archives, but I have saved several especially good posts.  I'm fixin' to hit the sack now, but will look for those in the next couple of days.

Ramblin' RoseModerator

 A merry heart is good medicine.  Proverbs 17:22 

 

To: neurosarcoidosis From: mebramer@...

Date: Sun, 22 Aug 2010 15:20:25 -0600Subject: Disability

I know there is someone or use to be, but with brain fog I can't remember who, that did or knew how to dodisability, I've put it off thinking I can just work more in my MK business, but I can't, it's still just too much work

for me.  I guess I should check out the archives too, I will do that too.  But suggestions are appreciated.Thanks:)Marla