Re: Rec's to Dr.R to Improve egroup

[Guest guest]

hi , forgive me if I sound ignorant, maybe I am whenever it

comes to computers and how these sites work, but I'm sure that I'm

not alone in not knowing how to " post " , I very rarely post but I for

one don't want to feel like I'm in an English class when I do, that

what I write will be scrutinized. You brought up some good

points...1,2,5) comment 6 was ugly, although I am educated, some of

those that contribute greatly to this site may have difficulty with

spelling or grammar and this should not keep someone from sharing

what is on their heart or by giving another encouragement. In my

opinion, comments 3 and 4 sound very uncaring about the whole person.

There is more to each one of us besides being morbidly obese and

wanting the mgb, and opening up and sharing about ourselves helps

others in joining in. I'm sorry if you find this reply offensive, it

is only my opinion, but then again, wasn't that what your suggestions

for this group based on...your opinions. good luck on October 4th.

Leilla from Claremont NC

In MiniGastricBypass (AT) egroups (DOT) com, " " <lavolpini@c...> wrote:

> Hello there,

>

> My surgery is scheduled for October 4th. Below, I have proposed

some

> guidelines when posting to this egroups list which perhaps (in a

very

> abbreviated version) could pop up in a dialogue box whenever one

logs

> on to access the list. After reading posts everyday for the last 2

> months, my personal recommendations are the following:

>

> 1. Before sending your message to the whole list, ask yourself (and

> answer it honestly) the question: would it be best to just reply

to

> one or a few personal email addresses or will many people want to

> read

> my intended message? Personal conversations between two or among a

> small group of people are not of interest to the rest of us (i.e.

> What

> time are we meeting at Cattlemans? " ).

>

> 2. When posting, change the subject line to reflect your message.

If

> you leave a prior subject line, the rest of us will open your

message

> expecting to read about that subject. It is misleading to have a

> subject line which does not relate to your message. When your

> message

> should have just been sent to a personal email address (see 1

above),

> it is doubly annoying. For example, do not subject the rest of us

to

> the following example:

>

> Subject: Re: Stricture of the Esophagus

>

> Thanks for your reply. I sent it onto him at college so

> that

> he'll know he can ask ??

> if he needs to!

> Wish me luck!

>

>

> 3)When posting, realize that some of us are not of your faith nor

> worship as you do. If you want to discuss your religion, ask for

or

> send your prayers, contact people by their personal email

addresses.

> This egroup list has one common theme - the MGB. That is what

unites

> us here. Religion, like politics should be kept off the list.

>

> 4) When posting, do not bring in topics which have nothing to do

with

> the MGB. This is not the place to vent and seek support for the

> myraid issues that plague all our lives. Each of us has to deal

with

> problems such as work, love life, sickness and death of our

families

> and friends and while it may be tempting to pour your problems out

> everywhere - refrain from doing it here. Contact people privately

for

> this type of support. Once again, this egroup list has one common

> theme - the MGB. This is what unites us here. Also, use some

> discretion about posting about food. Foods and drinks related to

> healing from the MGB are appropriate. Describing your healthy diet

> post op is appropriate. Describing your partying at Cattleman's

and

> all the " yummy " food you are eating makes a mockery of the rest of

us

> who take this surgery very seriously.

>

> 5) While I found the T. and DES (et al) emails a " guilty

> pleasure " for its soap opera/OJ Simpson value, this egroup is not

the

> place to argue or speak to each other disrespectfully. It holds the

> rest of us hostage to really negative emotions and brings the rest

of

> us onto the battlefield without a say in the matter. As much as

you

> would like to get in your two cents,and believe me, I had plenty I

> wanted to add, it really is wise to keep quiet so that it passes as

> soon as possible. Objective, factual and honest posts,including

> reporting on personal experiences - whether in support of, neutral

or

> against the MGB are appropriate. Those people who launch personal

> attacks are " egged on " when you choose sides, add your personal

> remarks to defend the attacker, attackee or even Dr R. Refrain from

> adding to the mix so that people who write nasty things won't have

an

> audience and a reason to keep posting this way.

>

> 6) Before sending your message, do the rest of us the favor of

> checking your spelling and grammer. I don't mean that you have to

run

> it by an English teacher, but at least look it over once before

> sending. Some of you may want to take remedial English in addition

to

> losing weight. Thin and uneducated is not particularly attractive.

>

> 7) Before sending your message, do the rest of us the favor of

> deleting the numerous headers and prior messages so we don't have

to

> wade through them only to find your message buried somewhere in the

> middle.

>

> 8) Don't forget to check " wrap words " so that we don't have such a

> difficult time reading what you have to say.

>

> I offer these recommendations to Dr. R to consider as he tries to

> improve this egroup list instead of just complaining or withdrawing

> because the egroup doesn't meet my needs. I am sending it to the

> overall list because I know that many of you may have additional

> recommendations or ones that are different than mine. Best regards,

>

[Guest guest]

,

> Hello there,

>

> My surgery is scheduled for October 4th.

First off, let me congratulate you and wish you the best of luck on the 4th!

Second, I don't post to this list as often as I should, mostly because I

don't want to start slinging mud everywhere again.. But, I must voice <type>

my concerns this time.. Please don't take this to heart as like you,

these are only MY opinions... But, I believe I speak for most of this group

as I have been here since January and have come to know many of them well..

>Personal conversations between two or among a

> small group of people are not of interest to the rest of us (i.e.

> What

> time are we meeting at Cattlemans? " ).

Although you may disagree, I think this is a good thing for those who either

join this list late or who for some reason or another have missed previous

posts. Some may not know/remember what time they are meeting their fellow

pre/post-opers and would like to.. Just because something is not of interest

to you or me, does not mean it does not interest a lot of others. I do not

believe posts about going to dinner are a " mockery " as you put it. There is

NOWHERE in Dr R's patient manual that says that our lives stop and we are

not allowed to go to dinner with a bunch of friends! Actually he even has

cards to use when you go out to eat to save you some money. taking this

surgery seriously does not mean you're dead, it just means that you can eat

just a small appetizer and still have leftovers compared to an appetizer,

soup/salad, main course and dessert!!

> 2. When posting, change the subject line to reflect your message.

This has been a concern in the past as well and one that I agree with

whole-heartedly.

> 3)When posting, realize that some of us are not of your faith nor

> worship as you do. If you want to discuss your religion, ask for or

> send your prayers, contact people by their personal email addresses.

> This egroup list has one common theme - the MGB. That is what unites

> us here. Religion, like politics should be kept off the list.

I do not know who you worship, if anyone/anything at all but please know

that MY GOD is a very good, loving and wonderful GOD. MY GOD is my best

friend and I love him very much. I will speak about him as I please since he

is my father, mother, brother, sister and freind. He has helped me

throughout this entire process and has worked MANY miracles into my life. I

am VERY grateful for the GOD that I worship. If you do not like it, IGNORE

IT! I will keep my personal opinions to myself! THAT is MY OPINION! If you

<or anyone else does not agree with this, please don't post it on this list!

I don't want to start yet another flame war.. I will be more than happy to

recieve personal emails though and will reply to them.> I will also continue

to pray for everyone on this list as well as Dr R.

> 4) When posting, do not bring in topics which have nothing to do with

> the MGB. This is not the place to vent and seek support for the

> myraid issues that plague all our lives.

<SNIP>

>Describing your partying at Cattleman's and

> all the " yummy " food you are eating makes a mockery of the rest of us

> who take this surgery very seriously.

I do not agree with this one either. This is a SUPPORT GROUP! Different

things in our lives affect us in many ways and when it comes to death other

things that are really upsetting/depressing, we NEED the support of someone

who has been there.. There is NO WAY to know if someone has " been there,

done that! " unless you ask..

> 5) While I found the T. and DES (et al) emails a " guilty

> pleasure " for its soap opera/OJ Simpson value, this egroup is not the

> place to argue or speak to each other disrespectfully.

AMEN! Oops.. I mean, HERE HERE!!!!

> 6) Before sending your message, do the rest of us the favor of

> checking your spelling and grammer. I don't mean that you have to run

> it by an English teacher, but at least look it over once before

> sending. Some of you may want to take remedial English in addition to

> losing weight. Thin and uneducated is not particularly attractive.

I don't think thiz one is fare eether... Many peepole on thiz list hav onlee

ben using a computer a short time.. Many ov them are replying from werk and

dont hav tiem to chek speeling erors.. Agan, IGNOR IT!

> 7) Before sending your message, do the rest of us the favor of

> deleting the numerous headers and prior messages so we don't have to

> wade through them only to find your message buried somewhere in the

> middle.

>

> 8) Don't forget to check " wrap words " so that we don't have such a

> difficult time reading what you have to say.

I agree with both of these as well although I have never had a problem

reading posts that did not word wrap very well...

In my thoughts and prayers,

Terri

" But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate

you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. " - Luke

6:27-28

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[Guest guest]

--

I realize you are re-thinking some aspects of your recommendations,

but to be honest, I liked them pretty much as they stand. For

example, regardless of how supportive of the " whole person " we may in

all charity wish to be, I am a bit weary of wading through multiple

pleas for prayers, " you go girl " 's, or comments about people's

private

lives, EXCEPT as it relates to the MGB. I like and admire the group

as a whole, but my only connection with it is through a surgery that

we all want and which some of us have had. As for the " uneducated "

comment, well, actually, I'm tired of wading through careless,

stream-of-consciousness, ill-spelled messages, too. So I have to

echo

the wish - please check spelling and punctuation - commas and periods

are your friend and mine!

--Aimee