I appreciate ya'lls support very much

June 29, 2004

I have been wallowing in self pity for days now. I have been very

depressed and cant seem to shake it off. I appreciate every body's

kind words about returning to work. I go back todday and on

thursday. Hopefully each day I will get a little stronger. Two

days of work is not a good measurement of success or failure.

Besides, I really dont want to give up yet.

I spoke with my doc yesterday, I asked him to refer me to a

psychiatrist or therapist. He said he is sending my most recent

films back to Cinci to the doc there who we had consulted about my

having the tp/ict. Meanwhile I may look into having a block to try

to buy some more time. If I am going to have another big surgery, I

would like to put it off until after the first of the year. I had

two really big surgeries in 6 months and I dont think I am

physically or mentally ready for another. Especially one so far

from home.

I had gotten so many kind responses that I dont know where to begin

thanking everybody. Heidi I would have loved the day trip but would

have to take my kids with me and that would have been a bit much for

all of us. I also appreciate hearing about the blocks. Thank you

all for sharing those stories as well.

I hope I shake off this depression soon, its so unlike me to have

the blues. I am usually one of those obnoxiously perky people, so

when I am down, I am way down. At least I got a lot of sleep..lol.

Thanks again for all ya'll kind words and support. I have said many

times I dont know where I would be without the kindness of the

people on this board. Well I need to get dressed for work and I

will check the mb tonight.

With all my love and respect,

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