Joke

[Guest guest]

Dearest Redneck Son,

I'm writing this slow because I know you can't read fast. We don't live

where we did when you left home. Your Dad read in the newspaper that most

accidents happen within 20 miles of your home, so we moved. I won't be able

to send you the address because the last Oklahoma family that lived here

took the house numbers when they moved so they wouldn't have to change

their address. This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine.

I'm not sure it works so well, though. Last week I put a load of clothes in

and

pulled the chain. We haven't seen them since.

The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first time

for three days and the second time for four days.

Bubba locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried because

it took him two hours to get me and your father out.

Uncle Bobby Ray fell into a whiskey vat last week. Some men tried to pull

him out but he fought them off and drowned. We had him cremated. He burned

for three days.

Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pickup truck. Butch was

driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your other two

friends were in the back. They drowned because they couldn't get the

tailgate down.

There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much out of the normal has

happened.

Love,

Mom