Fw: Somethings to think about

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Great questions...but where are the answers?? Hmmm? Love, Judy FW: Somethings to think about Some of these are old but some are new. Most are worth the read...1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than anambulance. 2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front ofa skating rink. 3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the wayto the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy peoplecan buy cigarettes at the front. 4. Only in America......do people order cheeseburgers, large fries,and a diet coke. 5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chainthe pens to the counters. 6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars inthe driveway and put our useless junk in the garage. 7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen callsand then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone wedidn't want to talk to in the first place. 8. Only in America......do we buy hotdogs in packages of ten and bunsin packages of eight. 9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe theprocess so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning'bloodsucking creatures'. 10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines withBraille lettering. EVER WONDER Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquidmade with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Whydon't they make the whole plane out of that stuff? Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomedthrough stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumergoods. On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. On a bag of Fritos: ...You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.Details inside. (the shoplifter special)? On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but,it's "just" a suggestion). On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upsidedown." (well...duh, a bit late...) On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."(...and you thought????...) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." Funnything is I've actually done this. On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operatemachinery after taking this medication." (I bet there would be lessaccidents at the work place if we got those doped up kids out of carsand machinery) On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One can hope) On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet,eat nuts." On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does notenable you to fly." (I blame the parents)