Guest guest Posted July 13, 2004 Report Share Posted July 13, 2004 Back in 1987/88 when I lost 130 pounds and got down to a size 8, I felt weird about the compliments. While I know most of the people meant it in a kind way, I felt it also meant, " God, you were such a fat pig before. " Like they were drawing attention to how awful I used to look. And then there was the, " I was SO worried about you before. " Yeah, and SO happy you weren't me! :-) Tressa999 I dont know about anyone else but since the surgery I've gotten alot of compliments about my weight loss, but to tell you the truth... I really hate them. I've never like compliments and i thought it was because I was over weight and had no self esteem but honestly after a year later I still feel the same and dont see myself any different. Its like I dislike the compliments even more now than when i was heavier. I just get mad, I dont know why. Does anyone feels slightly similar? I doesnt seem normal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2004 Report Share Posted July 13, 2004 I think that most people are astonished by how different I look and how quickly it is all happening. I think most people don't mean it in a mean way. I actually love the compliments, sometimes it's a little much, but otherwise, I appreciate how much people are noticing. I didn't do this for nothing, I did it for my physical health, mental health, of course we all have wanted to be thin or we wouldn't be on this site to begin with, etc. I mean at the point I was at it was all or nothing and I'm not going to do any of this half way. I am proud that my joints don't hurt every morning any more and that I am not putting a bunch of junk in my system. I am proud of how I look and if people notice my new look, attitude, health or whatever ... then thank you very much, because I went through a hell of a lot to get where I am right now. Be proud of yourselves and love every minute of it. from Delaware Lap RNY 3/10/04 261/182/125 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2004 Report Share Posted July 13, 2004 yea i felt like that before, I think more I just feel like that because I dont feel I deserve compliments. I dont know? > Back in 1987/88 when I lost 130 pounds and got down to a size 8, I felt > weird about the compliments. While I know most of the people meant it in a kind > way, I felt it also meant, " God, you were such a fat pig before. " Like they > were drawing attention to how awful I used to look. And then there was the, > " I was SO worried about you before. " Yeah, and SO happy you weren't me! :-) > > Tressa999 > > I dont know about anyone else but since the surgery I've gotten alot of > compliments > about my weight loss, but to tell you the truth... I really hate them. I've > never like > compliments and i thought it was because I was over weight and had no self > esteem > but honestly after a year later I still feel the same and dont see myself > any different. > Its like I dislike the compliments even more now than when i was heavier. I > just get > mad, I dont know why. Does anyone feels slightly similar? I doesnt seem > normal. > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2004 Report Share Posted July 13, 2004 I understand how you feel. I do not know how to take a compliment and never had. I do have a fear of being thin again too. I was thin all through highschool and college and I spent 4 years with a stalker. A serious stalker. I found myself trying to hide in crowds after that and not be noticed. When I think of myself as being thin, I think of myself as being noticed and that scares the daylights out of me. , you are the pscycholigist, is this crazy?? > I dont know about anyone else but since the surgery I've gotten alot of compliments > about my weight loss, but to tell you the truth... I really hate them. I've never like > compliments and i thought it was because I was over weight and had no self esteem > but honestly after a year later I still feel the same and dont see myself any different. > Its like I dislike the compliments even more now than when i was heavier. I just get > mad, I dont know why. Does anyone feels slightly similar? I doesnt seem normal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 14, 2004 Report Share Posted July 14, 2004 Crazy? No. But is more than just a bit skewed. By that I mean we all have facades to hide behind. Once we're out from that facade we are all exposed. It is not always a physcial trait such as obesity or begin thin but everybody knows somebody who acts like a real jerk but knows that inside they are kind and caring. Same principle here. When that event happened to you the process in your mind simply chose an easy 'tag' to put on a cause. The fact is that there could be another more dangerous stalker out there who likes LARGE women and spots you and becomes obsessed. Now is it easier to 'blend in' being thinner or being one of 'those LARGE women'? What he was attracted to might have been your hair, your lips or your eyes or the way you walked. There is no rationalization to predators. Enjoy the compliments and simply say thank you and let it go. Its easier to accept a compliment than a jeer any time. Just don't read an agenda into a kind word or two. > > I dont know about anyone else but since the surgery I've gotten > alot of compliments > > about my weight loss, but to tell you the truth... I really hate > them. I've never like > > compliments and i thought it was because I was over weight and had > no self esteem > > but honestly after a year later I still feel the same and dont see > myself any different. > > Its like I dislike the compliments even more now than when i was > heavier. I just get > > mad, I dont know why. Does anyone feels slightly similar? I doesnt > seem normal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.