this is it!!!

[Guest guest]

so i'm wide awake - and ready to go. well...not completely. i still

have to take a shower and pick up my parents (the ferry dock is a

block away from my building) - and take preop pics for you all, must

mentally ready to go.

i had a mini panic attack last night. it went somewhat like this.

ate pizza. joey took me to get ice cream. right before i could order

- my mom calls. " what time is the ferry - where do i go - what time

does it come back " ...i felt like screaming - get a schedule! don't

you see i'm under a lot of stress here! then i got into the ice cream

store - and looked at all the flavors and realized i didn't want any

of them. i didn't really want " chunky ice cream " but being as i

couldn't have it later i thought i should while i still could. that

let to the - what the hell am i doing?!?!? i feel fine right now. i

must be crazy. that led to the - hey, am i breathing? i don't think

i can breathe. oh no! no i feel sick. what if i'm too sick to have

surgery tomorrow? what if i don't breathe again...

luckily - joey was there to calm me down. a little crying - and a

little walking - and a little hugging - and we decided i didn't need

to buy any ice cream (he's so patient with me )

we then went to see cinderella man. i really liked it. i know this

isn't a movie review place - but i thought it was good. and it kept

my mind off things (for the most part).

i realized sometime between russell kissing bridget jones and getting

hit the smacker that i don't feel perfectly fine right now. i had

food up my nose - which happens all the time. i was clenching my

misaligned jaw. this surgery is going to ultimately feel better. and

that's where i am this morning. i remember why i'm doing this insane

thing, and why i chose to do it. and even if i'm bummed that i had

this stupid cleft to begin with...they can fix it and i'll be better.

ok - i'm going to take a shower and get dressed. thanks everyone for

everything. it means more than you could ever know (well...at least

until you go through it )

-becky

[Guest guest]

I know you are probably gone already, but good luck, and we will be

thinking of you! Be sure to post when you are up to it.

> so i'm wide awake - and ready to go. well...not completely. i

still

> have to take a shower and pick up my parents (the ferry dock is a

> block away from my building) - and take preop pics for you all, must

> mentally ready to go.

>

> i had a mini panic attack last night. it went somewhat like this.

> ate pizza. joey took me to get ice cream. right before i could

order

> - my mom calls. " what time is the ferry - where do i go - what time

> does it come back " ...i felt like screaming - get a schedule! don't

> you see i'm under a lot of stress here! then i got into the ice

cream

> store - and looked at all the flavors and realized i didn't want any

> of them. i didn't really want " chunky ice cream " but being as i

> couldn't have it later i thought i should while i still could. that

> let to the - what the hell am i doing?!?!? i feel fine right now.

i

> must be crazy. that led to the - hey, am i breathing? i don't

think

> i can breathe. oh no! no i feel sick. what if i'm too sick to

have

> surgery tomorrow? what if i don't breathe again...

>

> luckily - joey was there to calm me down. a little crying - and a

> little walking - and a little hugging - and we decided i didn't need

> to buy any ice cream (he's so patient with me )

>

> we then went to see cinderella man. i really liked it. i know this

> isn't a movie review place - but i thought it was good. and it kept

> my mind off things (for the most part).

>

> i realized sometime between russell kissing bridget jones and

getting

> hit the smacker that i don't feel perfectly fine right now. i had

> food up my nose - which happens all the time. i was clenching my

> misaligned jaw. this surgery is going to ultimately feel better.

and

> that's where i am this morning. i remember why i'm doing this

insane

> thing, and why i chose to do it. and even if i'm bummed that i had

> this stupid cleft to begin with...they can fix it and i'll be

better.

>

> ok - i'm going to take a shower and get dressed. thanks everyone

for

> everything. it means more than you could ever know (well...at least

> until you go through it )

>

> -becky

[Guest guest]

Becky,

I'm thinking of you and praying that all is going/has gone well for

you today. Maybe your ice cream attack was your way of getting it

over and done with. Now, you can relax and recover - the panic has

been sated.

Sending you happy, positive thoughts!!!

Carol

> so i'm wide awake - and ready to go. well...not completely. i

still

> have to take a shower and pick up my parents (the ferry dock is a

> block away from my building) - and take preop pics for you all, must

> mentally ready to go.

>

> i had a mini panic attack last night. it went somewhat like this.

> ate pizza. joey took me to get ice cream. right before i could

order

> - my mom calls. " what time is the ferry - where do i go - what time

> does it come back " ...i felt like screaming - get a schedule! don't

> you see i'm under a lot of stress here! then i got into the ice

cream

> store - and looked at all the flavors and realized i didn't want any

> of them. i didn't really want " chunky ice cream " but being as i

> couldn't have it later i thought i should while i still could. that

> let to the - what the hell am i doing?!?!? i feel fine right now.

i

> must be crazy. that led to the - hey, am i breathing? i don't

think

> i can breathe. oh no! no i feel sick. what if i'm too sick to

have

> surgery tomorrow? what if i don't breathe again...

>

> luckily - joey was there to calm me down. a little crying - and a

> little walking - and a little hugging - and we decided i didn't need

> to buy any ice cream (he's so patient with me )

>

> we then went to see cinderella man. i really liked it. i know this

> isn't a movie review place - but i thought it was good. and it kept

> my mind off things (for the most part).

>

> i realized sometime between russell kissing bridget jones and

getting

> hit the smacker that i don't feel perfectly fine right now. i had

> food up my nose - which happens all the time. i was clenching my

> misaligned jaw. this surgery is going to ultimately feel better.

and

> that's where i am this morning. i remember why i'm doing this

insane

> thing, and why i chose to do it. and even if i'm bummed that i had

> this stupid cleft to begin with...they can fix it and i'll be

better.

>

> ok - i'm going to take a shower and get dressed. thanks everyone

for

> everything. it means more than you could ever know (well...at least

> until you go through it )

>

> -becky