Guest guest Posted July 25, 2005 Report Share Posted July 25, 2005 OK, I know this is a little silly thing to post when so many of you are going through such tough recoveries but maybe you can offer me some advice... A guy asked me out this week, friend of a friend kind of thing and we've just chatted via email so far. I like him and would like to meet but said I didn't want to just yet - I have my surgery 7 weeks today and I just feel so self-conscious about going on a first date with braces on my teeth and a big underbite - I've always been conscious of the underbite, I'm now 27, but now the braces just make me so much more aware. Even if he didn't care about that stuff, and we do keep seeing each other - isn't it weird that I'm then going to have double jaw surgery with a recovery of god knows how long when I'm going to be on soft foods (i.e. no romantic dinner dates for him), and from what I can gather from all of your experiences, unable to move my mouth much (ie. no long talks or goodnight kisses?) Are those fair expectations? My OS told me it would probably take 3 weeks before I'm ready to go back to work but he hasn't mentioned anything about what recovery is like after that time - and I'm too embarrased to ask him these kinds of questions! I've talked to my best friend about it but it would be so valuable to hear advice from people out there who know what its like to have been so self-conscious of having an underbite. Sorry for the trivial post to all of you with serious problems! Joanna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 25, 2005 Report Share Posted July 25, 2005 Hey, On this site, nothing is trivial. It all helps to have peoples opionons on all different matters. I would say that if he asked you out, even with your underbite...go out with him and with in the next week or two just mention to him that you are about to have major surgery. He should be understanding about it. As for asking your doctor questions, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE try to get over any type of embarassement that you may feel. You need to talk openly to your doctor so that you go into this surgery feeling confident. Your doctor has probably heard it all, so I wouldn't worry about embarassment. Let us know if you have any more questions. Austria --- Joanna Skinner wrote: > OK, I know this is a little silly thing to post when > so many of you > are going through such tough recoveries but maybe > you can offer me > some advice... > > A guy asked me out this week, friend of a friend > kind of thing and > we've just chatted via email so far. I like him and > would like to > meet but said I didn't want to just yet - I have my > surgery 7 weeks > today and I just feel so self-conscious about going > on a first date > with braces on my teeth and a big underbite - I've > always been > conscious of the underbite, I'm now 27, but now the > braces just make > me so much more aware. Even if he didn't care about > that stuff, and > we do keep seeing each other - isn't it weird that > I'm then going to > have double jaw surgery with a recovery of god knows > how long when > I'm going to be on soft foods (i.e. no romantic > dinner dates for > him), and from what I can gather from all of your > experiences, unable > to move my mouth much (ie. no long talks or > goodnight kisses?) Are > those fair expectations? My OS told me it would > probably take 3 weeks > before I'm ready to go back to work but he hasn't > mentioned anything > about what recovery is like after that time - and > I'm too embarrased > to ask him these kinds of questions! I've talked to > my best friend > about it but it would be so valuable to hear advice > from people out > there who know what its like to have been so > self-conscious of having > an underbite. > > Sorry for the trivial post to all of you with > serious problems! > > Joanna > > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 25, 2005 Report Share Posted July 25, 2005 Joanna, Everyone is different, but my feeling is to go on the date and enjoy yourself. If things continue to move forward into a serious relationship it will give you a good taste of his bedside manner My motto in life is " If it was meant to be, it will be " I'm no relationship specialist, but I think you should go out and have fun. Don't worry about the braces and the underbite. If you explain that you are having surgery, it shows that you are on top of the situation and are taking care of. Try not to worry about it, you never know when you will meet the love of your life. I met my husband 12 years ago when he came to install a heater in my house I certainly wasn't expecting to get a husband that day...but I did! We married 18 months later. He's been great throughout my two mouth surgeries, 3 D & C surgeries and the birth of our two children - I couldn't have done it without him. Best of luck and keep us posted. > OK, I know this is a little silly thing to post when so many of you > are going through such tough recoveries but maybe you can offer me > some advice... > > A guy asked me out this week, friend of a friend kind of thing and > we've just chatted via email so far. I like him and would like to > meet but said I didn't want to just yet - I have my surgery 7 weeks > today and I just feel so self-conscious about going on a first date > with braces on my teeth and a big underbite - I've always been > conscious of the underbite, I'm now 27, but now the braces just make > me so much more aware. Even if he didn't care about that stuff, and > we do keep seeing each other - isn't it weird that I'm then going to > have double jaw surgery with a recovery of god knows how long when > I'm going to be on soft foods (i.e. no romantic dinner dates for > him), and from what I can gather from all of your experiences, unable > to move my mouth much (ie. no long talks or goodnight kisses?) Are > those fair expectations? My OS told me it would probably take 3 weeks > before I'm ready to go back to work but he hasn't mentioned anything > about what recovery is like after that time - and I'm too embarrased > to ask him these kinds of questions! I've talked to my best friend > about it but it would be so valuable to hear advice from people out > there who know what its like to have been so self-conscious of having > an underbite. > > Sorry for the trivial post to all of you with serious problems! > > Joanna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 25, 2005 Report Share Posted July 25, 2005 First of all, nothing is trivial if it's what you are feeling. As for the underbite, I wouldn't be self conscious about it - it's most likely much more noticible to you than it is to anyone else. Does he know you're about to have surgery (ie...did your friend/you tell him)? I'm sure if he asked you out this week, he already knows at least that you have braces...and he asked you out anyway! I think it might be a nice distraction before the surgery - you will see that it's all you start to think about soon. And it might be nice to have a romantic dinner the weekend before your surgery...something to look back upon when you can't eat ) Who knows, he might turn out to be ultra supportive during your surgery...and the more people around to boost you up the better! I think seven weeks (and post op time) is way too long to put off a date...so go for it. And feel beautiful while doing it! Just my two cents... -becky > OK, I know this is a little silly thing to post when so many of you > are going through such tough recoveries but maybe you can offer me > some advice... > > A guy asked me out this week, friend of a friend kind of thing and > we've just chatted via email so far. I like him and would like to > meet but said I didn't want to just yet - I have my surgery 7 weeks > today and I just feel so self-conscious about going on a first date > with braces on my teeth and a big underbite - I've always been > conscious of the underbite, I'm now 27, but now the braces just make > me so much more aware. Even if he didn't care about that stuff, and > we do keep seeing each other - isn't it weird that I'm then going to > have double jaw surgery with a recovery of god knows how long when > I'm going to be on soft foods (i.e. no romantic dinner dates for > him), and from what I can gather from all of your experiences, unable > to move my mouth much (ie. no long talks or goodnight kisses?) Are > those fair expectations? My OS told me it would probably take 3 weeks > before I'm ready to go back to work but he hasn't mentioned anything > about what recovery is like after that time - and I'm too embarrased > to ask him these kinds of questions! I've talked to my best friend > about it but it would be so valuable to hear advice from people out > there who know what its like to have been so self-conscious of having > an underbite. > > Sorry for the trivial post to all of you with serious problems! > > Joanna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 26, 2005 Report Share Posted July 26, 2005 You go Joanna! I'm willing to bet lots of money on the fact that you're gorgeous with or without the underbite and braces. Actually, since I've had my braces on as an adult I've been hit on by several men much to my surprise. Something about the braces making me look cuter or something. I don't know. Either way, be confident because you deserve to be. You've had the courage to get this surgery done and that takes a lot of confidence. Hats of to you Ms. Skinner:-) Sara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 2, 2005 Report Share Posted August 2, 2005 Hi Joanny, I'm sorry to hear that your date didn't live up to your expectations but like you said, it's better to find out now. Don't let the braces and surgery stand in the way of your dating. If someone didn't want to date you just because you had braces, then that's someone not worth dating anyway. I had just gotten my braces on when I met my husband almost 10 years ago. Neither my braces nor my huge overbite (which I felt way more self-conscious about than the braces) bothered him in the least bit. Here we are two kids, six surgeries and nine years of braces later and we're still happily married. Go out and have fun! I hope your surgery goes well. > Hi all, > I just wanted to check in for those of you who gave me such great > advice last week and were wondering how it went...well, with a lot of > support and encouragement from all of you I went on that date *gulp* > It turned out fine and he was cool about the braces (I told him via > email before we met up) - not bothered at all. I'm very glad I didn't > wait post-op 'cause I don't see myself seeing him again and like Sara > said I would have just built up this huge fantasy in my head only to > be disappointed! So - thanks Sara! And thanks to all of you - I feel > quite proud of myself for facing up to my fears > Hope all your recoveries are going well - my surgery is 6 weeks from > today - I can't wait! > Joanna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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