Re: You look like a totally different ...

[Guest guest]

Thanks all for your comforting words. As usual you've made me feel

better and some of you even laugh:-) , a bulldozer. Lol! I swear

I can hear one just outside my house. Is that you?! And Cammie, " the

most improved woman " ? If it had been me I would have socked him in

the face but then again, I seem to have quite the temper. Hee hee.

For the benefit of and her daughter and any other pre-

opper let me make this clear: this " you look totally different "

factor has not been depressing me, it's been annoying me. This to me

at least is different. I haven't broken down and cried ever about

this. I've produced a grouchy face as a result of it which believe

me, with the fact that I can't smile as Borislittlesal suggested does

not make me look like a very sunny person. I think what has annoyed

me more is that I was surprised by how some people just don't have

the sensitivity or intelligence to realize that what they say can

affect you in a good or bad way. Naive am I? Probably because in

other realms of my life I've always shrugged off hurtful or stupidly

said things. But when someone says to you (and I didn't say this in

my other post because I didn't want to scare anyone but I guess

honesty is best here) " oh my god you look totally different, very

swollen, i liked you better before, " you really want to smack them in

the face. Instead you smile (as best as you can with half your face

swollen and this huge splint in your mouth) and try to not bark at

them " who the hell asked you in the first place and yes I look

different because I'm swollen. "

, like I used to be taunted as a child about my looks and

it hurt like hell. I think if has been through those taunts

already hearing someone say " you look totally different " will be a

walk in the park for her. She's tougher than you think and if some

kid does say this to her (especially if it was the jerk who taunted

her in front of you) tell her to say " yeah, I definitely look

different from you because I'm prettier and smarter. " My doctor

spent some time talking to me about the psychological after effects

of having your face changed from the surgery, probably because I was

very adamant that my surgery was for functional reasons and that I

did not want to change physically. I would recommend perhaps having

your doctor talk about it with so that she is somewhat prepared.

She might still get upset or annoyed as I did but I promise you that

she will get over it, especially with the help of a good and kind

mother like you. My own mother didn't understand why I was getting

annoyed about these comments until she witnessed someone telling

me " you look totally different " and suddenly she understood why I

felt the way I did. Last night after I posted to you guys she sat

down on my bed and we talked about how I felt for a very long time

and you know, just talking about it felt better. So my best advice to

you is to make sure you talk about it with . Provide her

with an avenue to vent or hopefully rejoice about her new chin:-)

As for me, I get annoyed about the comments but I am happy to say

that I am liking my new chin and my new look more everyday and I

swear I can still see that old twinkle in my eye. My mission for the

next week: learning to smile with the splint in my mouth. I'll let

you know how it goes!

Thanks to all for listening as always.

Sara