Mean Moms/help

[Guest guest]

I've read, with sadness, the posts about " mean moms " and I don't want to be

one. Ever! I need help and I hope I'm not blasted, but if that's what it

takes, I trust enough of you to give it to me full strength. You see, I

have little ones that are counting on me to be a stable mother.

I'm concerned about MY reaction to the weight of my children. I don't want

to be a " mean mom " . The other day my 9yodd put on her dance leotard and

skirt and I noticed a small tummy forming. Freaked me out. She's switched

dance studios (the 1st one had almost all thin girls to a new one that has

almost all overweight girls) and I don't want her to think that's healthy

for her.

We went for a walk yesterday and I asked her (big mouth!) if she noticed the

girls at the new studio struggled with weight. She said she didn't even

notice. I felt like an idiot that I HAD.

I guess my biggest concern is that I (1) cause her to have an eating

disorder - she can't tolerate sugar so she's already " different " there or

(2) she'll end up like dh and I.

I just so don't want her to go through what I had. My " mean mom " made 1

comment that I remember growing up. She said, " you're starting to get hips,

I see " (she said she " meant " that I was becoming a young woman) I took it as

" you're getting fat " .

That's all it took. From that night on I vowed to lose weight (I was always

the skinny one.) at any and all costs. I'd wake up and do sit ups every

chance I had. I'd sneak out of the house at night and run up and down the

street as fast as I could (isn't that pathetic?) I'd " punish " myself for

eating this or that by seeing how long I could go without eating.

I don't want to even imply weight issues to my children. They enjoy the

protein drinks. We've been discussing carbs/sugars and how it affects us,

etc. They are ages 5, 9 and 12.

I need help.

Hugs,

Lori