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Eeek! What am I doing?!

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I've been making the arrangements for my surgery -- it's scheduled for

July 8, and my friend and I have our plane tickets and hotel booked.

I'm still futzing with flex spending accounts and the loan

application. My surgeon's info packet arrived in the mail a few days

ago. I hadn't really been nervous at all until I started reading it.

It's all serious and stuff. :-)

I had a sudden moment of clarity where I thought: What the heck am I

doing to myself? Allowing people to slice and rearrange my JAW?! I

know these butterflies are normal. I know I'm in good hands. I expect

everything to go well, although I'm a little worried that the results

won't be dramatic enough to justify all this expense and hassle. I

know that at the very least I'll have straight teeth and a beautiful

smile, but my secret hope has been that I'll become pretty. Or

something approaching it. And the reality probably is that I'll still

look like me.

Anyway, I just read Cammie's and Grapebat's experiences with lower

advancement and that calmed some fears, raised others. Like, is it

really OK that I'll be discharged a few hours after surgery? I guess I

have to trust that my surgeon, who is one of the best, knows what he's

doing. But I'm a control freak! This is hard. :-)

All part of the journey, I suppose .... Thanks for listening.

Luna

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