Re: Confidence

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 12/13/01 4:23:28 PM, duodenalswitch writes:

<< This may sound like a really dumb questioning here, but lately my life has

just been one big disappointment after another and sometimes I wonder why I

even try. While I know that not *every* problem will be solved by having the

surgery, I know that *some* things in my life will get better. I guess I am

just having to tell myself that I am worth having this done, even tho I wish

I could have had it 20 yrs ago and I hope I will be as " good " at doing what I

need to do for maximum weight loss as you guys are.

>>

Sorry, that got sent prematurely! I just wish I had been able to do it

without the extreme results of surgery.... I'd say I was even MORE confident

post-op because my body adjusted so damn well to the surgery... I think I

would have had more second thoughts in the first few weeks post-op (and it

would be totally NORMAL) if I had experienced problems eating or had nausea,

etc. I was really pleasantly surprised because I expected at least some

problems post-op... especially after seeing many post-ops go through pretty

serious complications -- I definately knew what *could* happen...

I think having it done now is GREAT --- I think also 'what if I weren't so

fat in my late 20's and thirties? How would my life have gone? What kind of

career succes *might I* have experienced without this weight as a barrier?

Would I have made drastically different decisions and/or would different

opportunities have presented themselves -- or not?' I can say that I'm glad

I had the surgery done AFTER birthing two children. I still *may* have

another (perhaps not with THIS husband, but... ROFL)... but I'm content with

the children I have and I think I would be a little more worried about

possible malnutrition, etc. if I were never prego and wanted a child after

the surgery...

I'm rambling here -- but I just wanted to say I can understand where you are

coming from with your doubts. It's a pisser that you have to wait,

especially when you were scheduled for around this time.. Perhaps you can set

a few small goals to complete within the month either to prepare for the

surgery or pamper yourself? It may make the time go more quickly.. I know,

everyone says 'keep a journal' (I even finally got myself one with beautiful

butterflies on it - I thought that was a perfect motto for me!) but I've had

difficulty actually sticking with it...

You ARE on your way.. every day is ONE STEP closer. I'd focus on getting

extra protein in, especially the two weeks before the surgery. Also, keep

WELL hydratrated. I mean, to the point of peeing ALL THE TIME. LOL Our

former Mt. Sinai nutritionist Niccole gave me these two pieces of advice and

they were the most valuable for me. I think the protein really helped in my

recovery (helps repair tissue), gave me a nice reserve, helped to prevent

nausea immediately post-op and the hydration helped my recovery and made me

more comfortable while I was waiting for that damn leak test result to come

back...

{{{{CArole}}}}}

all the best,

lap ds with gallbladder removal

January 25, 2001

Dr. Gagner/Mt. Sinai/NYC

10 months post-op and still feelin' fabu

preop: 307 lbs/bmi 45

now: 198 lbs/bmi 28/size sweet 16 but squeezin' into a 14! LOL

[Guest guest]

Carole,

Be patient...your day is soon approaching and all will unfold as it

should.

When I read your post I HAD to comment...CONFIDENCE...yes, after

surgery it increased...as my body as be getting smaller, I have felt

more confidence...in my physicalness, in my appearance, in my attitude

that I can do anything and take on the world! So, though I had

confidence prior to surgery, I really have lots more now.

What I thought this confidence would do for me would help me take care

of the problems in my life...that somehow, being thinner would make my

life better. It hasn't in the way I thought. It has allowed me to do

alot of things much easier...like walk, breathe, fit in a seat, tie my

shoes, shop for clothes and such...it really does change those things

in your life...but I think that it magnifies proplems that already

exist that are more significant than tying your shoes...

If you have relationships that are on rocky ground, a job that is

less than desireable, issues with sexuality...anything...any

issues that may have aided the weight to go on in the first place,

etc...it doesn't change those things. They are still there, whether

you are fat or thin...

What the confidence does, at least for me, is this - it gave me the

energy to know that I can look at these issues head on and take care

of them for myself. It gave me the motivation to want more for myself

because I think I deserve better.

Having this surgery also made me realize that I have always had all of

the opportunity and potential that I feel I have now...I just used my

fat as an excuse to settle or to not do something because I didn't

think I could...that is a tough thing to deal with. I am 33 and I

know that I am still young...but I look back and see that for at least

10 years, I have put off living my dreams, or at least trying them,

because I let my fat be my focus of why I can't...I let my fat be in

the forefront of everything...and with me now releasing the fat and

sending it on it's way, MY LIFE is in the forefront...not my fat...

It's a beautiful thing...but don't let anyone tell you that it's

easy...as they say, " they don't operate on your head " ... you still

have to " deal with life " ...but the confidence does help!

So, there you have it...that's my story and I'm sticking with it!

Keep asking questions, keep us posted and be well.

Mulvaney Rossell

San Obispo, CA

OPEN DS / 4.23.01

Dr. Keshishian

282 then / 195 today

-87 pounds in almost 8 months

[Guest guest]

Discovering DS surgery was like God finally saying " here, this for you,

take it, you have asked with all your heart for the weight to leave and

never come back, here is the answer to your prayers " . How can anyone

not think that they don't deserve surgery.

> Due to having to rearrange my surgery, I now have another month to wait.

> Geeze, sometimes I just wish I could go ahead and get it over with next week,

> like originally scheduled. But, other times I just have to be patient. Not

> something I am good at.

> But what I wanted to ask all of you is, how was your confidence level before

> surgery as compared to after surgery? Did any of you have to talk yourselves

> into feeling worthy of having the surgery?

> This may sound like a really dumb questioning here, but lately my life has

> just been one big disappointment after another and sometimes I wonder why I

> even try. While I know that not *every* problem will be solved by having the

> surgery, I know that *some* things in my life will get better. I guess I am

> just having to tell myself that I am worth having this done, even tho I wish

> I could have had it 20 yrs ago and I hope I will be as " good " at doing what I

> need to do for maximum weight loss as you guys are.

> Carole

[Guest guest]

Carole, three words: YOU ARE WORTHY! This will be the best thing

you could do for yourself! You definitely deserve it!

Tracey in Santee (San Diego)

> Due to having to rearrange my surgery, I now have another month to

wait.

> Geeze, sometimes I just wish I could go ahead and get it over with

next week,

> like originally scheduled. But, other times I just have to be

patient. Not

> something I am good at.

> But what I wanted to ask all of you is, how was your confidence

level before

> surgery as compared to after surgery? Did any of you have to talk

yourselves

> into feeling worthy of having the surgery?

> Carole