Re: I feel like crying

[Guest guest]

It is really hard to deal with the guilt and I know you just want what is best for your son. My son is 20 mo old and just started a helmet and I would kill to have him only have a 7mm difference.

I know you are really upset, but you are actually really LUCKY. Feel glad you got him a helmet and you got him down to the almost "normal" range of assymetry which I have heard is between 0-6mm.

He is still young and his head is still growing, you can always try the alternative treatments out there. Kathy knows a lot about them and we just started Craniosacral Therapy and I feel like it is helping my boy.

I got post partum depression from the birth of my daughter combined with our helmet fiasco. The medication and counseling are really helping me cope. There is nothing wrong with what you are feeling, I really think professional help is the way to go.

Love him for who he is and tell him everyday you love him. Tell him he is perfect, because he is.

Estrella Moeller

From: sallyweaver29 <sallymcnab@...>Plagiocephaly Sent: Mon, October 11, 2010 6:49:39 AMSubject: I feel like crying

OK, I'm new. I need some support/advice. I have a two year old who had severe plagiocephaly. My health visitor brushed me off saying that his hair would cover it up and no-one mentioned helmets/treatments until he was more than 6 mo. We eventually got him a helmet. He was quite severe at 18mm and after 3 months we got him down to 7mm. He stopped improving so we were advised to take it off. I thought I could live with the results but the truth is that every single time I look at him I just see the wonkyness. I feel guilty and shallow. I wish I could see past it but I can't seem to. His ears are still quite wonky and his head from the front sticks out more behind his right ear and the right side of his forehead is less formed. I remember when I couldn't get pregnant - all I could see were pregnant women, or when you break up from a boyfriend, all you see are happy couples. All I see are little boys with perfect heads. It's really doing my head in. He's

been a difficult boy anyway (only in terms of feeding and sleeping) but it's been made so much worse by the head. I'm struggling to bond with him and am beating myself up for the way I'm feeling. Has anyone else gone through anything similar. Is there light at the end of the tunnel. I would hate for this to affect my relationship with him for the rest of his life. I have a three year old son, too. It doesn't help that his head is perfect. I can't help comparing. I feel evil.

[Guest guest]

Hello,Welcome to the group. Even when your child receives great correction, as a parent, it is difficult not to dwell even on the smallest amount of asymmetry that remains. I find myself focusing on the 2.5 mm asymmetry that remains for my daughter. I think parents become hyper sensitive to the slightest bit of imperfection, especially after a significant amount of improvement. We tend to forget how really bad the head shape was before treatment. Being a parent to one child is not easy, but it becomes so much more difficult when having more than one. It is challenging and can be very stressful at times, especially without support from others. There is no reason why your son's remaining asymmetry should be affecting your relationship with him. Please don't blame your little boy for something that is not his

fault and try not to compare your children. They are all different and very special in their own ways. I suspect there are some other things going

on. Find a friend or family member that you trust enough to share your feelings. You may even want to seek the help of a professional. Being a mom is difficult and without the proper support system, feelings of hopelessness can surface. There is nothing wrong with asking for help.Good luck to you and keep us posted on your progress.-AmyFrom: sallyweaver29 <sallymcnab@...>Plagiocephaly Sent: Mon, October 11, 2010 9:49:39 AMSubject: I feel like crying

OK, I'm new. I need some support/advice. I have a two year old who had severe plagiocephaly. My health visitor brushed me off saying that his hair would cover it up and no-one mentioned helmets/treatments until he was more than 6 mo. We eventually got him a helmet. He was quite severe at 18mm and after 3 months we got him down to 7mm. He stopped improving so we were advised to take it off. I thought I could live with the results but the truth is that every single time I look at him I just see the wonkyness. I feel guilty and shallow. I wish I could see past it but I can't seem to. His ears are still quite wonky and his head from the front sticks out more behind his right ear and the right side of his forehead is less formed. I remember when I couldn't get pregnant - all I could see were pregnant women, or when you break up from a boyfriend, all you see are happy couples. All I see are little boys with perfect heads. It's really

doing my head in. He's been a difficult boy anyway (only in terms of feeding and sleeping) but it's been made so much worse by the head. I'm struggling to bond with him and am beating myself up for the way I'm feeling. Has anyone else gone through anything similar. Is there light at the end of the tunnel. I would hate for this to affect my relationship with him for the rest of his life. I have a three year old son, too. It doesn't help that his head is perfect. I can't help comparing. I feel evil.