Re: WLS stigma - did you 'cover up' your WLS?

[Guest guest]

I'm a pre-op, and I don't work. But the only people that know about the

surgery are those I'm closest to. My Mom, My sister in law, my sister. As

far as anyone else, I'm not telling. When they ask how I did it I will just

reply, diet and excersise and leave it at that. I truly believe it's none of

thier business. However, if someone that is overweight like I am, notices my

weight loss, and would like to know how I did it, depending on how well I

know them, I would share the WLS with them, only so they could know what's

out there for them.

And that's my .02 worth.

.. ´¨¨)) -:¦:-

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((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Melisa -:¦:-

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Check out my homepage! <A

HREF= " http://ourworld.cs.com/melisa111968/myhomepage/personal.html " >My Personal

Quest</A>

[Guest guest]

nne,

Peptic Ulcers. Surgery is similar and will result in weight loss!

Theresa

Surgery date: DS Nov. 19, 2001

Dr. Gregg Jossart

Highest weight: 293

Surgery weight: 251

Current weight: 227

Height: 5' 7.5 "

> Hi, all--

>

> Question for you all: WLS obviously still holds a

> pretty rotten stigma. Did anyone here try to hide the

> fact that they had WLS, by saying perhaps that you had

> a different surgery?

>

> I don't know (and I know I need to work on this) that

> I'm able to tell co-workers and acquaintences that I'm

> having WLS... but I also don't know how I will explain

> taking a 3-4 week leave of absence and coming back

> smaller. On the one hand, its none of their business,

> and on the other hand, I'm having surgery and people

> are going to ask what for, so I need to be armed.

>

> Thoughts?

>

> Thanks, all!

>

> Hugs,

>

> nne

>

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

nne,

I told no one except my husband and one friend that I had WLS initially. I

told work that I was having my gallbladder removed and " some other things " .

This wasn't entirely a lie, just not the whole truth.

At about 1 year post op I started to come clean with everyone. At the time I

had surgery almost no one I knew or anyone that I knew, knew a person who had

wls. I really didn't want to constantly explain myself and have to listen to

other's opinions. After I was a year post op, when someone would just look

at me there was no explanation needed for why I would do this!

Dawn

Dr. Hess, Bowling Green, OH

BPD/DS

4/27/00

www.duodenalswitch.com

267 to 165 5' 4 "

size 22 to size 10

have made size goal

no more high blood pressure, sore feet, or dieting!

[Guest guest]

nne,

No one knows I'm going in for surgery and I'm not saying a word when

I go on " vacation " . If I need more time off, I'll tell them I had my

appendix taken out. If they ask about the weight loss, I'll tell

them what I told them during the last diet I was on: " I'm eating

less and exercising more. Hey, where'd you get that sweater? "

-m

At 12:19 PM -0800 12/9/01, timarie55 wrote:

>nne,

>

>Peptic Ulcers. Surgery is similar and will result in weight loss!

>

>Theresa

>Surgery date: DS Nov. 19, 2001

>Dr. Gregg Jossart

>Highest weight: 293

>Surgery weight: 251

>Current weight: 227

>Height: 5' 7.5 "

>

>

>> Hi, all--

>>

>> Question for you all: WLS obviously still holds a

>> pretty rotten stigma. Did anyone here try to hide the

>> fact that they had WLS, by saying perhaps that you had

>> a different surgery?

>>

>> I don't know (and I know I need to work on this) that

>> I'm able to tell co-workers and acquaintences that I'm

>> having WLS... but I also don't know how I will explain

>> taking a 3-4 week leave of absence and coming back

>> smaller. On the one hand, its none of their business,

>> and on the other hand, I'm having surgery and people

>> are going to ask what for, so I need to be armed.

>>

>> Thoughts?

>>

>> Thanks, all!

>>

>> Hugs,

>>

>> nne

>>

>>

>> __________________________________________________

>>

[Guest guest]

nne:

I told my co-workers and family I was having ulcer/diverticulitis and

gastric reflux surgery. I posted a " cover story " about it a few months

ago--a fast search of the archives should turn it up. I have never

lied about anything in my entire 49 years, but I lied about this. Why?

Because my co-workers are hypocritical and hypercritical. Saddest

thing? I'm an RN and my co-workers are RNs and MDs. I knew they'd give

me nothing but grief (as would my family)so, after a lot of soul

searching, I just plain lied about it.

down 35 lbs and considering tossing the scale out the window.

> Hi, all--

>

> Question for you all: WLS obviously still holds a

> pretty rotten stigma. Did anyone here try to hide the

> fact that they had WLS, by saying perhaps that you had

> a different surgery?

>

> I don't know (and I know I need to work on this) that

> I'm able to tell co-workers and acquaintences that I'm

> having WLS... but I also don't know how I will explain

> taking a 3-4 week leave of absence and coming back

> smaller. On the one hand, its none of their business,

> and on the other hand, I'm having surgery and people

> are going to ask what for, so I need to be armed.

>

> Thoughts?

>

> Thanks, all!

>

> Hugs,

>

> nne

>

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

I'm new to this website today, but since I'm pre-op and scheduled for

Lap DS on Jan. 8th, I thought I'd add my 2 cents worth. I have type

2 diabetes. So those who know I have diabetes (my wife's family

members) I am telling that I'm having pancreatic surgery to eradicate

my diabetes, which is true. I'm also telling them that one of the

side effects is a significant reduction in appettite, which is a good

side effect although it only lasts for a year or two. I am also

telling them that a part of the therapy after surgery is a strict

diet and exercise program, which will benefit in healing and

completely controlling the diabetes.

Those who don't know I have diabetes are those who typically give me

a hard time about my weight, like my parents, brothers and sisters,

all of whom live out of state, and some old acquaintances, etc.

They'll get just enough info to satisfy what they have been whining

to me about for years. I'll tell them that I've seen a physician and

dietician to help me distinguish between hunger and appettite, so now

I'm eating much less and exercising a lot more, and taking daily

vitamins and eating a lot less of the yummy stuff. That's it.

> Hi, all--

>

> Question for you all: WLS obviously still holds a

> pretty rotten stigma. Did anyone here try to hide the

> fact that they had WLS, by saying perhaps that you had

> a different surgery?

>

> I don't know (and I know I need to work on this) that

> I'm able to tell co-workers and acquaintences that I'm

> having WLS... but I also don't know how I will explain

> taking a 3-4 week leave of absence and coming back

> smaller. On the one hand, its none of their business,

> and on the other hand, I'm having surgery and people

> are going to ask what for, so I need to be armed.

>

> Thoughts?

>

> Thanks, all!

>

> Hugs,

>

> nne

>

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

At 12:01 PM -0800 12/9/01, wrote:

>Hi, all--

>

>Question for you all: WLS obviously still holds a

>pretty rotten stigma. Did anyone here try to hide the

>fact that they had WLS, by saying perhaps that you had

>a different surgery?

We each have to handle this in the way that meets our individual

needs best. In my case, I wrote to friends, family and selected

office colleagues with a long e-mail telling them what surgery I was

about to have, why I had made the decision, giving kudos to my PCP,

my cardiologist and my surgeon (Dr. Elariny) for their help and

support, and giving the readers a short summary of the surgery plus

URL's to Dr. Baltasar's writeup (still the best overview that I have

seen) and Dr. Gagner's video of the lap DS.

But, I did not write until I knew for sure that all was in order (my

insurance approval come just days before my scheduled surgery, and in

fact, we used the schedule to help move the insurance folks to their

decision, as they were dragging their heels), because I did not want

to look like a fool sending that long e-mail and then not having the

surgery.

In the end, you have to do it the way that is most comfortable for

you. I am 61 years old, about to retire next year, and i care not

one whit what people in the office think. Funny, though, they were

ALL very supportive. In fact, nobody among friends, family or

colleagues gave me any grief whatever about the procedure. And I get

approving comments now as the folks in the office see more and more

holes in my belt, loose clothes, and new clothes to replace those

" undergrown. "

My kids also are happy, because I am so fortunate to have just about

anything that a person could want materially, and that makes it very

difficult for anybody to buy me gifts. So this Christmas, they know

that I would be happy to get stuff in size 2XL, and, hopefully, next

year in 1XL.

Best,

Steve

--

Steve Goldstein, age 61

Lap BPD/DS on May 2, 2001

Dr. Elariny, INOVA Fairfax Hospital, Virginia

Starting (05/02/01) BMI = 51

BMI on 12/01 = 39 (-80 lb.) on a bumpy plateau!

[Guest guest]

When I had surgery I wrote up a memo stating that I needed time off because I

was going to have surgery. I was asked what kind...I said I would rather not

discuss it....And I didnt its no one business....People ask me all the time how

I am losing weight and I play dumb like " I have lost weight, why thanks " and

then I change the conversation....if a MO person asks me how I lost weight I

would tell...but the people in my life are not the kind who are asking because

they care but because they are bored and would love to use me as a conversation

piece to pass the time....

Lisbeth

tirafix@... wrote: Hi, all--

Question for you all: WLS obviously still holds a

pretty rotten stigma. Did anyone here try to hide the

fact that they had WLS, by saying perhaps that you had

a different surgery?

I don't know (and I know I need to work on this) that

I'm able to tell co-workers and acquaintences that I'm

having WLS... but I also don't know how I will explain

taking a 3-4 week leave of absence and coming back

smaller. On the one hand, its none of their business,

and on the other hand, I'm having surgery and people

are going to ask what for, so I need to be armed.

Thoughts?

Thanks, all!

Hugs,

nne

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

I didn't tell my job what I was doing except that it was medically

neccessary abdominal surgery.. but I worked with a bunch of

backstabbing petty people (not on my shift, but still- folks talk), so

I had good reason. There were 3 who knew what I was really having.

At my new job, I don't hide it at all.. I don't shove it in their

faces, but I don't hide it, either. I've already given the DS website

& some basic info to a nurse who works at one of my facilities, & she

plans on looking into it the second she has coverage. I think it

depends on the people you work with.. my concern was being told that I

could not have time off because it was " elective " surgery. Your case

may be different. Some days I'm tempted to get a shirt from

ObesityHelp, the one that says something like, " I'm shrinking! Ask me

how! " just to share. Other days, I just like being closer to " normal. "

Hope this helps a bit...

Liane

> Hi, all--

>

> Question for you all: WLS obviously still holds a

> pretty rotten stigma. Did anyone here try to hide the

> fact that they had WLS, by saying perhaps that you had

> a different surgery?