RE: OT - Tabitha

[Guest guest]

ee,

I will reply more to this later, but thanks. Having 's benefit here. I

have to be there in 20 mins and Karters still sleeping so got to run. THANKS

Tabitha

number23 wrote:

Tabitha, Sweetie,

Our hearts go out to you. I for one don't think you are psychotic or in the need

of mind altering medications. I think what you describe is a beautiful and

precious event.

The process you are traveling through is different for each person. For years,

my mother would smell her mother's perfume. Just a wiff, like Grandma had

stopped in a moment. Now days, my sister smells my mother's cigarett smoke. Who

is to say?

It's not a religious debate. I say that to everyone here. If you think

came to see you, that's a perfectlly OK thing to believe. If you think you're

losing your mind, well hang in there, you're not.

You and had what most people only read about in books - a life time of

loving. I tend to believe a loving God would let it be possible for a loving

husband to just come see you if he felt the need to. Why not? He obviously loved

you deeply, as you loved him. As a person who has never been fortunate enough to

experience the kind of bond the two of you had, I guess it might hold true that

was better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. will

never be completely gone from you heart, or your life. Try if you can to

celebrate the love you shared and don't be in too much of a hurry to dispose of

the reminders, painful as they may be at the moment.

I don't know your church affiliations, etc., but perhaps there is a grief

support group somewhere you could join to help you express your feelings in a

safe enviornment. Maybe the kids and you can build a collage of his photos to

hang on the wall, sharing stories and memories as you work on it. And perhaps

like me, when you thank God at night, tell him to tell hello and that you

love him. I say, " If you see Mom around... "

She was a loon, but I do wish Mom was here to see the kids grow or do some silly

thing they come up with. I wish I could pick up the phone and call her. When I

pass her house, I say, " Hey mom, how'r ya doing? " I talk to her a lot actually.

I have also been talking to a HOSPICE grief counselor via email. And like

suggeted I do, I wrote her a long letter and that did help too.

I guess I just want to reassure you that ther is no " Right " way or wrong way for

you to feel right now. It's not like we learn this in school or something. When

we had to go to Mom's service I told , " I've never done this before either,

so I don't know how anymore than you do - I think the only rule for us to

remember is to be polite to other visitors. "

We all love you dearly and support you completely. Please don't ever feel like

you cant say what is honestly in your heart to us. When you see around,

tell him we said hello.

ee

Mother of 3 Clubfooted Sons:

- Bilateral Club Feet April 1998

Everett - Bilateral Club Feet September 2003

Garrison - Bilateral Club Feet March 2006

Visit us on the Web!

www.WildlifeRevivalTaxidermy.com

[Guest guest]

ee~ That was beautifully written! I feel sorry for people who do not

believe that our loved ones remain with us. I lost 2 of my grandparents before

I was married (one when I was 9), and I still think about them and wish they

could see grow up. I look for signs of them all the time, but don't

really see any. I guess that doesn't mean they aren't there! Who knows,

maybe talks to them.

Tabitha~ You are much stronger than I believe I would be;however, I know from

everything we have been through with that you don't have much of a

choice. Life is what it is whether we like it or not. Grief is a hard thing

and different for a lot of people. I am not a big crier, but still do

sometimes, as I am a hard one to figure out! Take your time, talk to

when you need him. I still talk to my grandparents in my prayers. I think it

helps you feel like you aren't in things alone. There is always someone there

for you and with you. I am glad you feel like you can come here and express

your feelings! This site has helped me so much and just knowing there are

people out there to listen can help get you through some harder times. Just

know, we are here for you!

19 months old

number23 wrote:

Tabitha, Sweetie,

Our hearts go out to you. I for one don't think you are psychotic or in the need

of mind altering medications. I think what you describe is a beautiful and

precious event.

The process you are traveling through is different for each person. For years,

my mother would smell her mother's perfume. Just a wiff, like Grandma had

stopped in a moment. Now days, my sister smells my mother's cigarett smoke. Who

is to say?

It's not a religious debate. I say that to everyone here. If you think

came to see you, that's a perfectlly OK thing to believe. If you think you're

losing your mind, well hang in there, you're not.

You and had what most people only read about in books - a life time of

loving. I tend to believe a loving God would let it be possible for a loving

husband to just come see you if he felt the need to. Why not? He obviously loved

you deeply, as you loved him. As a person who has never been fortunate enough to

experience the kind of bond the two of you had, I guess it might hold true that

was better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. will

never be completely gone from you heart, or your life. Try if you can to

celebrate the love you shared and don't be in too much of a hurry to dispose of

the reminders, painful as they may be at the moment.

I don't know your church affiliations, etc., but perhaps there is a grief

support group somewhere you could join to help you express your feelings in a

safe enviornment. Maybe the kids and you can build a collage of his photos to

hang on the wall, sharing stories and memories as you work on it. And perhaps

like me, when you thank God at night, tell him to tell hello and that you

love him. I say, " If you see Mom around... "

She was a loon, but I do wish Mom was here to see the kids grow or do some silly

thing they come up with. I wish I could pick up the phone and call her. When I

pass her house, I say, " Hey mom, how'r ya doing? " I talk to her a lot actually.

I have also been talking to a HOSPICE grief counselor via email. And like

suggeted I do, I wrote her a long letter and that did help too.

I guess I just want to reassure you that ther is no " Right " way or wrong way for

you to feel right now. It's not like we learn this in school or something. When

we had to go to Mom's service I told , " I've never done this before either,

so I don't know how anymore than you do - I think the only rule for us to

remember is to be polite to other visitors. "

We all love you dearly and support you completely. Please don't ever feel like

you cant say what is honestly in your heart to us. When you see around,

tell him we said hello.

ee

Mother of 3 Clubfooted Sons:

- Bilateral Club Feet April 1998

Everett - Bilateral Club Feet September 2003

Garrison - Bilateral Club Feet March 2006

Visit us on the Web!

www.WildlifeRevivalTaxidermy.com

[Guest guest]

AMEN!

Re: OT - Tabitha

ee~ That was beautifully written! I feel sorry for people who do not

believe that our loved ones remain with us. I lost 2 of my grandparents before I

was married (one when I was 9), and I still think about them and wish they could

see grow up. I look for signs of them all the time, but don't really see

any. I guess that doesn't mean they aren't there! Who knows, maybe

talks to them.

Tabitha~ You are much stronger than I believe I would be;however, I know from

everything we have been through with that you don't have much of a

choice. Life is what it is whether we like it or not. Grief is a hard thing and

different for a lot of people. I am not a big crier, but still do sometimes, as

I am a hard one to figure out! Take your time, talk to when you need

him. I still talk to my grandparents in my prayers. I think it helps you feel

like you aren't in things alone. There is always someone there for you and with

you. I am glad you feel like you can come here and express your feelings! This

site has helped me so much and just knowing there are people out there to listen

can help get you through some harder times. Just know, we are here for you!

19 months old

number23 wrote:

Tabitha, Sweetie,

Our hearts go out to you. I for one don't think you are psychotic or in the

need of mind altering medications. I think what you describe is a beautiful and

precious event.

The process you are traveling through is different for each person. For years,

my mother would smell her mother's perfume. Just a wiff, like Grandma had

stopped in a moment. Now days, my sister smells my mother's cigarett smoke. Who

is to say?

It's not a religious debate. I say that to everyone here. If you think

came to see you, that's a perfectlly OK thing to believe. If you think you're

losing your mind, well hang in there, you're not.

You and had what most people only read about in books - a life time of

loving. I tend to believe a loving God would let it be possible for a loving

husband to just come see you if he felt the need to. Why not? He obviously loved

you deeply, as you loved him. As a person who has never been fortunate enough to

experience the kind of bond the two of you had, I guess it might hold true that

was better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. will

never be completely gone from you heart, or your life. Try if you can to

celebrate the love you shared and don't be in too much of a hurry to dispose of

the reminders, painful as they may be at the moment.

I don't know your church affiliations, etc., but perhaps there is a grief

support group somewhere you could join to help you express your feelings in a

safe enviornment. Maybe the kids and you can build a collage of his photos to

hang on the wall, sharing stories and memories as you work on it. And perhaps

like me, when you thank God at night, tell him to tell hello and that you

love him. I say, " If you see Mom around... "

She was a loon, but I do wish Mom was here to see the kids grow or do some

silly thing they come up with. I wish I could pick up the phone and call her.

When I pass her house, I say, " Hey mom, how'r ya doing? " I talk to her a lot

actually. I have also been talking to a HOSPICE grief counselor via email. And

like suggeted I do, I wrote her a long letter and that did help too.

I guess I just want to reassure you that ther is no " Right " way or wrong way

for you to feel right now. It's not like we learn this in school or something.

When we had to go to Mom's service I told , " I've never done this before

either, so I don't know how anymore than you do - I think the only rule for us

to remember is to be polite to other visitors. "

We all love you dearly and support you completely. Please don't ever feel like

you cant say what is honestly in your heart to us. When you see around,

tell him we said hello.

ee

Mother of 3 Clubfooted Sons:

- Bilateral Club Feet April 1998

Everett - Bilateral Club Feet September 2003

Garrison - Bilateral Club Feet March 2006

Visit us on the Web!

www.WildlifeRevivalTaxidermy.com

[Guest guest]

Tabitha, I am with ee on this. Last summer a good friend of ours was

killed in a horrible accident. He left behind the love of his life since he

was 15-he was 42 when he passed. He had five little girls, the youngest of

them 3 year old twins. Early on the twins would be playing hide and seek

and seemed to believe their father was playing with them. Knowing the kind

of person he was and his sense of humor, he just might have been. Weird

things would happen and everyone would say it was Chip, and they still do.

Whether or not anyone believes in that is their own opinion. I know that

over the last year whether it was him or not-it sure has made everyone get

through things with a sense of humor. Everyone made collages of pictures

and they are all in the family's living room. I think it has helped the

kids. And it reminds us of all the good stuff! I know his wife has a hard

time at night, that to me seems obvious and does not mean you need

medication. Hang in there.

and Logan

OT - Tabitha

Tabitha, Sweetie,

Our hearts go out to you. I for one don't think you are psychotic or in the

need of mind altering medications. I think what you describe is a beautiful

and precious event.

The process you are traveling through is different for each person. For

years, my mother would smell her mother's perfume. Just a wiff, like Grandma

had stopped in a moment. Now days, my sister smells my mother's cigarett

smoke. Who is to say?

It's not a religious debate. I say that to everyone here. If you think

came to see you, that's a perfectlly OK thing to believe. If you think

you're losing your mind, well hang in there, you're not.

You and had what most people only read about in books - a life time of

loving. I tend to believe a loving God would let it be possible for a loving

husband to just come see you if he felt the need to. Why not? He obviously

loved you deeply, as you loved him. As a person who has never been fortunate

enough to experience the kind of bond the two of you had, I guess it might

hold true that was better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at

all. will never be completely gone from you heart, or your life. Try

if you can to celebrate the love you shared and don't be in too much of a

hurry to dispose of the reminders, painful as they may be at the moment.

I don't know your church affiliations, etc., but perhaps there is a grief

support group somewhere you could join to help you express your feelings in

a safe enviornment. Maybe the kids and you can build a collage of his photos

to hang on the wall, sharing stories and memories as you work on it. And

perhaps like me, when you thank God at night, tell him to tell hello

and that you love him. I say, " If you see Mom around... "

She was a loon, but I do wish Mom was here to see the kids grow or do some

silly thing they come up with. I wish I could pick up the phone and call

her. When I pass her house, I say, " Hey mom, how'r ya doing? " I talk to her

a lot actually. I have also been talking to a HOSPICE grief counselor via

email. And like suggeted I do, I wrote her a long letter and that

did help too.

I guess I just want to reassure you that ther is no " Right " way or wrong way

for you to feel right now. It's not like we learn this in school or

something. When we had to go to Mom's service I told , " I've never done

this before either, so I don't know how anymore than you do - I think the

only rule for us to remember is to be polite to other visitors. "

We all love you dearly and support you completely. Please don't ever feel

like you cant say what is honestly in your heart to us. When you see

around, tell him we said hello.

ee

Mother of 3 Clubfooted Sons:

- Bilateral Club Feet April 1998

Everett - Bilateral Club Feet September 2003

Garrison - Bilateral Club Feet March 2006

Visit us on the Web!

www.WildlifeRevivalTaxidermy.com