Recent thread on RNY experience (very long)

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Here's a thread (names withheld) from the OSSG list that I mentioned

here recently. It's rife with the kind of diet mentality I was intent on

never reliving! As I have said before, I would have stayed MO before

undergoing a potentially punishing procedure with mediocre long-term

results (when compared to DS).

While the advice exchanged isn't " bad " in and of itself, I think it's

important to note that these folks are compelled to permanently embrace

this sort of mentality in order to maximize their long term success.

I didn't want to have a life defined by limitations... I just wanted to

live like the " never been fat " folks and not have to think about this

crap! LOL. I'm happy to report that my DS is allowing me to do just

that. Woo hoo!

M.

---

in Valrico, FL, age 39

Lap DGB/DS by Dr. Rabkin 10/19/99

Starting weight 299, now 153

Starting BMI 49.7, now 25.5

Starting size 26/28, now 10/12

http://www.duodenalswitch.com/Patients/M/melaniem.html

Direct replies: mailto:melanie@...

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Subject: Re: Straying off the narrow path--HELP!

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MESSAGE ONE

Hi Folks--

I am now almost 3 months post-op, and have discovered an unfortunate

fact--I can eat sweets in small quantities and not dump. The bad part

is, I find myself snacking on a small oatmeal cookie here, a hershey

kiss there, a small sliver if pumpkin pie--you get the picture. I

wouldn't be so worried except that it has become a daily thing. I

probably eat 100 calories of unabashed sweets per day now--up from none

post-op.

Now, I realize this is a shadow of what I used to eat, but I have

stopped losing weight. More importantly, this is the same kind of

eating habit, in tinier form, that got me to where I was before WLS. I

know that I have about 18 months to change habits, and I do not feel

that I am on the right track any more.

I sure could use some inspiration and any practical suggestions you all

might have.

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MESSAGE TWO

I know I found myself eating way too many things over the holiday

weekend that were not the best choices for

me! I know I did not do like I could have pre op but I still felt bad

about it. I decided this morning that I was going to do my best to get

back on track and make better choices again. So far... so good. I still

take it one day at a time and sometimes, one minute at a time:)

Don't beat yourself up, just realize that you want to change that habit

now and ask yourself if you really

want it. Or even... try saying you will save it for later, sometimes

that works for me and it might be a

few days before that later comes. Trust me, I am no saint here but I am

trying to make better choices

because I want this tool to work for a lifetime.

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MESSAGE THREE

I had this problem early on too.. at about 3-4 months I was a nutcase,

testing my limits. I don't dump on sugars either. Sugar and starch on

the other hand... blammo. I finally started doing things like sucking a

lemon drop when I wanted some sweet, or now I eat watermelon. Sweet,

watery goodness. No sugar added popsicles do the trick too. And not

that bad for you either.

It took about 3 weeks for me to get my head around the problem. I still

find myself in the baking section at the grocery store, looking at the

tubs of frosting and thinking. That was my secret sin before WLS,

snacking on frosting, bleh. Last week I found myself staring at the

cake mixes and frosting, and actually thought about why I was there,

what I was stressed out about and went and bought some fitness magazines

instead. I think as long as you are aware of yourself and stop long

enough to think about what's going on inside and why you feel the need

for sweet, you have won 99% of the game.

For me, now, exercise has replaced my food obsession, tho that can be a

problem in itself. For now it's a healthy thing.

Maybe try writing your 100 reasons, and your accomplishments so far and

all the tiny things that are going well to help you get your head around

sweets.

You can do it girl!!!!

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MESSAGE FOUR

Cheating happens to the best of us. Just decide not to do it...or

substitute something else instead...like meat or cheese.

Don't keep the stuff in the house if possible. Are these cravings or

just habits? If they are sugar cravings I would look into taking

chromium picolonate one tablet a day. That wiped out any cravings I had

for carbs.

If it is a habit you need to stop that right now. Look at what is going

on in your lifestyle that supports that habit and see if you can modify

it. If you are having a hard time regaining control, talk to a

therapist.

It just ain't worth it to have a habit control us like that considering

how much we have invested into getting better.

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MESSAGE FIVE

So far, the recommendations for stopping unhealthy snacking have

involved the following:

1. Keep problem foods out of the house.

2. Substitute healthier versions of the snack (chocolate protein shake

for chocolate, grapes for candy).

3. Keep more healthy snacks handy (chicken or tuna salad and crackers,

SF popcicles, fruit)

4. Write out your 100 reasons for WLS and read it when tempted.

5. Get a therapist if all else fails (a good cognitive behavioral one).

I'll let you know if I get any other suggestions.

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MESSAGE SIX

You sound like me. Please let me know what answers you get offline. I

feel so out of control suddenly and know that I haven't lost weight in

about 3 weeks.

Somehow I need to find my way back.

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MESSAGE SEVEN

okay, I too, can eat sweets and not dump...and I found out all too soon

as well....and because of this, its the reason behind what I am about to

say:

now, something you wrote, intrigued me...... " I find myself snacking... "

you all of a sudden wake up and realize that you are snacking on

goodies, like you had no control over your mind or body?? I am not

trying to get smart here.....I just want you to see what it is that I am

seeing, based on what you wrote..........

and I want to tell you that you DO have control over what it is you do,

and the decisions you make......if you can remember this, and own the

fact that you are willingly putting sugar into your mouth, then you may

not " find yourself " in the predicament you have been in...does that make

any sense?

A few months ago, I would have probably wrote back to you and said

something like, " well.....you are not on a diet, and you need to live a

normal life....and a sweet here and there is how 'normal' people handle

thier sweet cravings.....and a sweet something-or-other has been okay

for me......so maybe this is okay too.. " ......

and now, I say.....that because I dabbled in eating sweet things again,

my tolerance level has increased, and you know what THAT means! It

means that my sweet cravings have increased, and my quantities have

increased as well......I had to get real with myself about one week

ago....and I had to go " cold turkey " ........I had to stop

completely......and this week, lo and behold, I finally broke into the

160's.....I have been at a stall for a few months, and just getting rid

of the sweets (even on the holiday weekend) I managed to lose a few

pounds....so, I know, that what I did for me, was exactly right on.

Anyway, I think that you need to stop the sweets, and not even replace

it for something else.....its gonna also be about breaking the

" snacking " thing, I think.

I also had to give up my protein bars.....I got to a point, that I

started to use them for a goodie.....a snack.....and that's another

reason, why I think I have lost a few pounds this past week...I gave up

sweets and protein bars.

If you can get more satisfying meals in, with perhaps one snack (only

healthy snacks that can count as protein, I would say) and drink to the

point of feeling like you are flushing yourself.....and really

concentrate on protein, with little amounts of carbs......I think this

is the key to getting over the desire to eat sugar......the sugar acts

like a drug on me, and makes me " want " to continue on with eating....and

then the whole merry-go-round starts up.....

You have to get this in line now, because the further you get away from

surgery, the harder this gets, if bad habits are not dealt with

aggressively.

I have to resolve, that yes, I will no longer diet....but no....I am not

" normal " ....I have to conduct my life in accordance with what works for

ME.....I will not be able to be like someone else down the road, who can

eat sweets a little bit here and there......sweets and me are like

alchohol to the alcoholic......and its just the way it is for me.....

this maybe will be what you will find, I don't know....

I would say, that you do not have 18 months to change....I would say,

that you have more like 8 months, possibly less, to change.....after the

8th month or so, you will see a huge difference in what you can eat and

tolerate...especially if you do not dump.....right around 8 months out,

I noticed a harder struggle in food isssues.....some days are better

than others.....but I am only 11 months post op right now....18 months,

is still kind of far away...and already, I am dealing with the issue of

food and making the right choices......its not easy, but its necessary.

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MESSAGE EIGHT

I don't post often but I totally agree with you and had to put in my 2

cents worth. I am only 3 months post-op and noticed my weight loss

slowing down and my desires increasing. Post op I was struggling to

get enough in and now suddenly I need to watch the snacking. But I

realize that I am not normal, I am a food addict/compulsive overeater

and the surgery doesnt change that....so I went back on a more

appropriate regeimen that better uses my tool, " the small stomach " . I

drink lots of water up until 30 minutes before eating. I allow myself 2

fruit & vegie snacks between the 3 meals otherwise my

protein based meals with some carbs are limited to 15 - 20 minutes,

approximately 1/2 cup - 1 cup depending on density, NO SUGAR and limited

fat. I DO NOT DRINK LIQUIDS for an hour and a half after eating. I am

not dieting, but I am staying healthy and have a measured way of

approaching food that acknowledges my disease of overeating. I have

chosen to participate in Overeaters Anonymous and find it to be a

lifesaver. The surgery is not the solution only a tool, we better start

getting it right now, it wont get easier as the

months and years go by.

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MESSAGE NINE

You are so RIGHT ON!!! I am not quite 8 months post-op and I agree with

your " take " on XXXXXX's situation. It is important to " nip " the

straying " in the bud. " It does not get any easier. In fact, it gets

more difficult.

Like you, I have been very successful post-op. But, I work at it all

the time. And yes, I have done some snacking myself - allowing myself

" just 2 macaroons a day. " It is a cycle of habit that re-visits all

of us who have had food addictions.

Your response to XXXXXX made me take a good look at what I have been

doing. Fortunately for me, hunger (in the usual sense) has not been a

part of my life over the last 7+ months. I get interested in eating,

but I am not hungry. Thank goodness for this.

I follow all the guidelines that we know so well - until about 9 PM.

Then, I decide to eat " just a bite or two " of something sweet. I can

" justify " it with how well I have followed the WLS plan - all day, all

week, all month, etc., etc. But, like XXXXXX, I have " strayed off the

narrow path. "

By next week, when I actually reach my 8th month, I will probably only

be down 6 lbs for the month of November. That's the smallest weight

loss for a month that I have had. I am not complaining. I am

grateful for my success. But, it is a wake-up call. I still have 60

lbs to lose.

I make my resolve with you XXXXX. No more bites of " something sweet "

just because I've done so well the rest of the day. I want to reach my

goal much more than I want to eat those 2 macaroons. It all seems so

BASIC and logical when I type it in black and white.

My " program " is a little different than yours - so I will continue to

eat my protein bars. You see, I eat no breakfast and no snacks. I eat

a protein bar - as a meal replacement for lunch - and a small

dinner that is 60% protein and a little vegetable. On a regular basis I

do not eat pasta, bread, crackers, cheese, or sweets of any kind. And

from this point on, I will grab a handful of grapes at 9 PM - and be

done with FOOD.

I MUST get past this addictive behavior.

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MESSAGE TEN

You are so right, girlfriend! I just need to be more mindful of my

choices and stick with protein--more solid protein at that. I started

doing that yesterday, and, lo and behold--2 lbs dropped off (had 3 oz of

steak for dinner today, yum!). I plan to keep your post and read it for

inspiration. It was the kick in the pants that I needed.

Thanks!

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MESSAGE ELEVEN

XXXXX and XXXXXX, THANKS. I needed that!!

I'm 10 mos. out from surgery tomorrow and have been struggling with the

" Snack Demons " for the past two months. And yes, my weight loss has

slowed down. It's so hard to be honest with myself about this. Turning

to food (as in sugar and fat!!) for comfort is so deeply ingrained in

me, it might as well be tattoed on my forehead: " FOOD JUNKY " .

I read a post a few days ago that stopped me dead in my tracks. Someone

had been to a support meeting where four women were in attendance who

had had WLS and had regained ALL their weight. Reading that was like a

bucket of freezing cold water being thrown in my face!! WHOA!!! Mew

(Mew is me!) not want that happen to HER, no WAY !!!!!!

So I really AM on a journey, and there really ARE ditches you can fall

into? And detours that can keep you from getting to your destination on

time? And rules to follow (or not, and suffer the consequences)? What

have I heard/read so many times about WLS? " This is NOT a magic pill or

a quick fix. " Oh DARN!! I wish it WAS!!!! <<sigh>> Yes, it's still

in my power to rob myself of the benefits of this surgery, by a simple

act of my will.

I think I need to start reading these posts more often. I tend to get

busy and forget to read. That's probably like a drowning man refusing

the offer of a raft, right??!!????? Or maybe a better analogy is, you

have this back yard full of treasures and somehow never find the time to

walk out your back door and pick one up. DUMB!!!!! REALLY DUMB!!!!!

So courage, my Sisters. At this time of year when everyone and

everything around us is shouting, " EAT!! EAT!!! It's ok, it's THE

HOLIDAYS!!!! " When the smells, sights and sounds of Christmas are

overpowering. When memories of our childhood Christmases and Hannukahs

and Ramadans are all about SPECIAL HOLIDAY GOODIES. THIS is the time we

should all have our noses buried in OSSG posts, our WLS books, or

whatever INSPIRES us to renew our resolve. Hey, let's not kid

ourselves. It's a real WARZONE out there.

Let's stay in touch.....and BE THERE for each other over the Holidays.

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